Melissa, Smiling Hellmaid

"Kurz, grab the getaway vehicle with tendrils. Sousuke, take down the sniper as quietly as you can. Kaname, see if you can scry that fellow we saw in Wien. Munchausen, TURN OFF THE ORCHESTRA! Covert operations do NOT have soundtracks!"


"Warmly, she smiled, her short dark hair shining in the light of the neon sign above her. Low fog curled about her ankles, and dark green tight pants covered her legs. She wore a dark green muscle shirt which proclaimed 'M^2: The Primal Chaos Tour' over that, and on her hips hung twin pistols. With one hand, she gestured inwards into some murky bar in a modern city. A sign up above indicated 'Blue Day' was playing that night. Except for the guns, she could easily have been one of their fans, unless you noted the eight men lying very still on the ground around her, mostly hidden by the mists. "


Born as a Summer Rites child in 1333 AY. She grew up friends with Munchausen, Kurz, and Sousuke. Trained by her parents and friends of theirs in House Alars, she insisted on serving as a grunt in Helgram's forces and working her way up. By 1368, she was the head of a special operations squad, to which her friend Kurz was assigned when he left the music business.

1372-1382 AY: The Wagnerian Jyhad Lord Loewen decides it's time for a war, in order to keep his army in shape. House Helgram's forces move into shadow and attack six variations of the high-tech shadow of Wagner in a row, gradually refining various strategies through experiment.

Kurz, Melissa, and Sousuke acquire experience in high-tech warfare from this.

Many adventures of theirs followed, until 1387, when Kaname came to Chaos to train with Millard Fillmore, her father. Lord Loewen assigned the three of them to covertly follow and guard her. She mistook them for deadly assassins and tried to defeat them all singlehandedly. This led to much embarrassment.

At the time, House Helgram had allied with the Stylite order against N'Stylite: Generation 3. The result of this is the disaster which becomes known as Second Altamont. Kurz and Marko fight a duel on top of a pillar as the battle rages around them. Sousuke, Kaname, and Melissa are all known to have been present, but it remains unclear what they did, in part because...

No one present will explain exactly what happened next, although mentioning Second Altamont to a veteran is likely to reduce them to either gibbering madness or homocidal mania. It apparently had something to do with Baron Munchausen, 'the Moon Princess', the Giant Bat of Sumatra, an army of Huggy Corrines, werewolf-vampire Brittney Spears clones, and Andy Jackson fighting Michael Jackson on top of Bessie, the Giant Cow of the Atlan Tepes. Maybe. That may simply be the deranged ramblings of lunatic minds.

Many hijinks followed together, until 1414, when Kaname left for the Jacquiverse to train with Mutsumi. Sousuke, Kurz, and Melissa went into covert operations. During the Chaos/Melnibone War, they provide valuable information to House Helgram; they end up commanding its defenses in 1424, during a major offensive push against Melnibone. And then...

An attack on House Helgram in 1424 by an elite Melnibonean Dragon Rider corps is blunted when Melissa, Kurz, and Sousuke stage a desperate defense of the House (while most of its armies are off fighting in shadow), followed by Allen von Munchausen, Princess Asuka, and Princess Kaname popping out of nowhere and crushing the Melnibonean commander flat with Munchausen's flying gondola. The commander survives, only to be pulled apart by berserk swans. No, really.

Lord Loewen rewarded the trio by promoting Melissa and Kurz to become the first two of Sousuke's Shin Ten Swords.

Personality and Aptitudes

Like her mother, Melissa wears two faces. Her face with friends is a fun-loving, slightly mischevious woman with a healthy appetite for food and sex. She'll try to sing like Mom too, though she's not so good at it. She can be very reckless when she's in this mode, and will cheerfully get drunk and tear the house down.

When at work, she is still cheerful, but becomes very efficient, putting her work first and any sort of entertainment second. She is not cold, but she does very much go into military hierarchy mode.

Melissa is born to command, instinctively taking charge of situations. This can lead to problems, such as when she orders Sousuke around with Lord Loewen watching. Or she and Kaname both try to take charge.

Melissa is no psyche-queen, but is reasonably well trained in Logrus (And has, in fact, delved into some advanced arts) and shapeshifting, and is no psyche peanut either. Fairly tough, she is middling in strength, but is a commander of great skill, though not quite on Asuka and Random's level. She's also a pretty good swordsman.

Melissa gets on well with both her parents, but is sometimes in trouble with Lord Loewen because of her tendency to assume command when Loewen expects Sousuke to be in charge. She has developed strong ties to Rebma, and is on good terms with King Miki.

Reactions to others:


The Founders

The Elders

Spouses of the Elders

The TAMD Generation

Spouses and lovers of the TAMD Generation

The UnS Generation

Spouses of the UnS Generation

F9R Generation

Notable Items

Melissa always seems to be carrying a goatload of concealed weapons.

In-Game Developments

Melissa seems to be #1 in getting maimed. BUT NOT DYING! ENDURANCE IS THE BEST STAT!!!!!