Scientific Report on the Zestiness of Evil Fate Clones

I said this can't be me
Must be my double
And I can't forget, I can't forget
I can't forget but I don't remember what.
--Leonard Cohen

Another life-another time
We're Siamese twins writhing intertwined
Face to face-no telling lies
The masks they slide-to reveal a new disguise
You never can win-it's the state I'm in
This danger thrills and my conflict kills
They say follow your heart-follow it through
but how can you-when you're split in two?
--Siouxsie And The Banshees

This report prepared by the F9R Bureau of Useless Measurements.

Name: Fate Akari
Aliases: 'Child Clad In Darkness'
Current Status: Dead, lingering as a Dream-shell
Zestiness: Not Zesty

While she possessed a significant resource base, including a huge Leng-based army and a Lion Spikard, Fate Akari failed to accomplish any goals or seriously hurt anyone. While the Session That Never Happened hinted at high Zesty Potential, in the end she was gutted like a fish. She has been revealed to be hovering about in the Dreaming still; she attempted an attack at the Grand Dance of the Stars, but was driven off by Hanajima and was last seen being chased by Nausicaa and Kaede. It is not known what the weakening of Destiny and Fate will do to her.

Name: Fate Chloe
Aliases: 'Servant', 'Noir', 'Yonag'.
Current Status: Erased by Pattern
Zestiness: Extremely Not Zesty

Fate Chloe has made three major attacks, all of which have failed miserably and resulted in her getting whooped on. She has failed to accomplish much beyond inflicting minor wounds, and died screaming for her mommy after being lured into a trap. And due to being erased instead of actually killed, she doesn't even leave behind a ghost. Looooooooser.

Name: Fate Kanako
Aliases: 'Krazy Kanako's Primal Khaos'
Current Status: Dead, Ghost, then Deleted
Zestiness: Quite Zesty 'til the End

While she didn't live long, Fate Kanako started out the gate early and auspiciously with a breakout of inmates at Arkham. She went on to achieve the utimate NPC Villian Accolade, killing a PC, by feeding Telemain Primal Chaos, taking out two major NPCs as well. She was quickly killed, but by high-powered NPC whoopass instead of PCs, this being the Amber Villian equivalent of retiring your jersey number. She indeed returned as a ghost, apparently having managed to abduct ghost-Telemain and bend him to her will in her efforts to do things like raise a ghost army in Limbo. She was finally deleted by the Pattern in a Belgalad crusade throwdown (probably because Destiny Kanako was there), but not before almost managing to give Suzuka a Primal Chaos enema via trump. Fate Kanako, we salute you and your maimin', killin', sodomizin' ways.

Name: Fate Orien
Aliases: 'ClawKillah'.
Current Status: Popsicled
Zestiness: Indeterminate

Fate Orien, while suspected of having been lurking in the background for quite some time now (and apparently operating under his Abyssal "mother's" direction), did not actually make any noteably visible moves until quite recently. He stole Melnibonean Demons for his Magic Pants, using them to cunningly turn a trap set by various Amber royals and friends into a trap -for- them. However, his plan backfired when they dealt with the deception quickly, and were able to keep him from turning Princess Azalyn into a wall trophy. While his accomplices escaped, he did not. He is now occupying a nice cryocoffin built for one, under the guard of Fuyutsuki.

Name: Fate Telemain
Aliases: 'Telmar'
Current Status: Erased by Pattern
Zestiness: Not Zesty

While Fate Telemain got off to a good start, snagging the Smoke Ring and working on Mageddon, his performance in the field was singularly unimpressive. His hideout was raided and he was picked off with minimal effor by a four-woman team. The Pattern later deleted him, ruling out a ghostly comeback.

Name: Fate Shiori
Aliases: 'Boston'
Current Status: Captive
Zestiness: Zesty

Fate Shiori performed better that Fate Telemain, putting up a staunch fight that gave Suzuka and Chloe a hard time. While she was ultimately defeated and led into captivity, she inflicted a fair bit of hurting before going down, and may possibly escape in the future.

Name: Fate Random
Current Status: Alive and Kicking with sandwich
Zestiness: Zesty and E-Ville Plus One.

Fate Random has a mixed success rate, but has made up for this by a fine sense of knowing when to run and a proven skill at pushing her opposite number's buttons. The fact that she remains at large despite having come to people's attention makes her Zesty by itself; expect her to remain in the game for some time to come. Zesty rating goes up a notch due to the discovery that she apparently hacked Gabrielle, for uses one can only speculate and shudder at. This plot would have gone undetected if it weren't for Chloe's paranoia about another entirely unrelated plot.

It is not known what the weakening of Destiny and Fate will do to her.

Name: Fate Suzuka
Aliases: 'Twilight'
Current Status: Dead, Possible Ghost
Zestiness: Extremely Not Zesty

How sucky. Despite having two Logrusfoils, Twilight managed to accomplish nothing except show up, die, and give Tomos Primal Loot. Very disappointing.

Name: Fate Kaname
Aliases: 'Tattoo?'
Current Status: Alive and Captured.
Zestiness: Formerly Zesty

The first non-vector Fate clone to be seen, Kaname performed considerably better than her cousin. On her first appearance she managed to not only maul a PC to the point of near death (impressive, considering how tough Tomos is), but also excape unscathed with a Logrusfoil as loot. Currently the target of her own personal manhunt - always a sign that you've truly arrived in the villian world. Well done! UPDATE Taken down with minimal resistance by a five-person hit squad, a decidedly unzesty end. Possibly she'll escape from prison, but otherwise a disappointing end to an initially promising career. UPDATE AGAIN Appears to have been dissolved in her cell by the Pattern.

Name: Fate Sousuke
Aliases: 'The fuck?'
Current Status: Might not actually exist
Zestiness: Not Zesty

A liquid-metal thing originally disguising itself as Nanami Minor showed up at the Tower of Metal. It was not Fate-Sousuke, but an artifact of the traitorous Logrus-Keeper Rose's home universe called the Silver Warrior. The only current evidence for Fate-Sousuke's existence is a videotape of him consorting with Fate-Random.