Even in the darkness of the bedroom, it felt too open. Under the covers, there was a measure of freedom, there was complete privacy and solitude.
"I have to say this..."
"You don't have to say anything."
"No, this I do. I love you. I wouldn't be doing this unless I did." She wanted to tell him the rest, but it felt silly and ultimately unnecessary.
Fortunately, he sensed her hesitation. "You are perfect," he whispered and kissed her lips gently. With one arm bracing his body, he brushed the hair away from her face with his opposite hand. "I love you too, and... I'll be gentle."
Guilty relief washed over Yui. She was just happy she hadn't been forced to say it; it was just too embarrassing. Instead of speaking further, she kissed him, deep, languid contact.
The feel of his body against her own, both bare and slick with sweat from the summer heat, was new and a little frightening. Yet she wouldn't have wanted it any other way, with anyone else.
There was a distinct image in her mind, of the final two pieces of a puzzle fitting together, and then fitting in to the whole. Whether that puzzle was her, just her life or something larger, she didn't care; the only thing that mattered was that the two pieces separated for so long were finally united.
Yui broke the kiss and smiled, feeling her heart pound in her chest. If only she could vocalize, explain just how right it was...
"What is it?" he whispered, panting on her cheek.
"Nothing. Just keep going," she replied, running one hand down Gendo's back. "I don't want you to stop."
His entire body quivering with need, Gendo kissed down her neck, his need intensifying as their bodies slid against one another.
There was a powerful urge in him to just complete the deed, find his own satisfaction, but just looking at Yui's face would not allow him to do that. Making her happy really was the single goal he had in his previously empty life.
Shifting his body so he was on his side next to her, he continued to cover her neck with kisses, letting his hand travel slowly down from her shoulder. The skin was smooth, flawless as he moved over the initial swell of her breast, and then finally he felt her nipple jutting out.
Yui sighed with pleasure and excitement. This contact was familiar, but the circumstances were new and more thrilling than she had imagined they'd be. This was a moment she'd thought about, dreamt about, fantasized about more than she'd ever admit, even to Gendo.
But if he continued to tease her, torture her, he'd find that she wasn't content to just allow him to lead. She'd take matters into her own hands.
Her hands weren't idle though; she liked the way his body had been so close to hers, his weight pressing down on her. Letting her own hand trail over his shoulder, her fingertips tracing a path down his upper arm, stopping to squeeze it briefly...
A soft cry escaped her lips and her body arched involuntarily as Gendo's fingers pinched her sensitive flesh while he suckled intently on her earlobe. Only for a moment did she allow herself to get distracted; her hand was soon moving down his forearm, across her chest, until it was over his, squeezing it lovingly, exerting gentle pressure.
He responded, covering her breast with his hand and cupping it. It was getting more difficult to control himself though, and he let his hand drift down.
With Yui's hand still covering his, Gendo moved over her smooth stomach, rubbing it gently and then continuing on. She was bold, he would give her that, feeling her other hand begin to stroke his thigh while he moved their hands together to her inner thigh.
Squirming a little at the ticklish feeling, Yui almost inadvertently moved Gendo's hand up to her eagerly awaiting sex. His touch, when it finally came, was foreign, but exciting, and she knew she couldn't wait any longer or risk exploding.
Forcing his hand away, Yui tried to pull him over so he would be on top of her, but couldn't quite manage it. "Damn it," she growled quietly in frustration.
Grinning to himself, Gendo did as she wished and retook his position on top of her, moving her hand over her head. Making a deep, thoughtful noise from the back of his throat, he just looked at her for a moment.
"Gen-chan." Her eyes were half-lidded as she looked at him, running her fingers through his hair.
He smiled gently at her. "Yui." He closed his eyes as he lowered his head to kiss her. The feeling was like everything he had ever wanted in the world was contained within this single moment.
Yui cried out in pain. It was sharp, but didn't linger, and it wasn't unexpected. Still, it was uncomfortable, and left her a bit shaken. For several breath-catching moments, she lay there, clinging to him with her arms around his neck, and just experienced the act.
It was a bit odd that Gendo didn't stop, but then, if she had really wanted him to, she would have said something. A child she was not and couldn't expect to be treated like one in the midst of such an adult activity.
"Gen-chan," she whispered, her fingers moving through his hair.
Eyes still closed, Gendo paused, though he didn't speak. Yui was a mystery to him, and even if he never solved her, this really was the one thing in the world he wanted. To be so ultimately close, to be one with her...
In the darkness, Yui saw a single tear slide down Gendo's cheek. Feeling the sudden lump in her throat, she touched his face and felt the track of the tear. "Oh, Gen-chan..." Not knowing anything else to say, she pulled him down and kissed him, feeling his body tremble ever so slightly.
His arms went under her body and held her tightly, his eyes closed. As long as they were close, the moment wouldn't end; they would always be together.
The emotion of it all overcoming her, Yui started to move against him, her earlier pain forgotten. For some reason, maybe stereotypes or cliches, she expected him to go into a frenzy, but she certainly didn't expect him to move so tenderly.
Holding her to him, as if she might be snatched away, Gendo treasured the experience. So entrenched in the moment, he missed the pleasure he had caused Yui.
"Tell me what's wrong," she said, more concerned with his odd behavior than the euphoria she had experienced.
"I... don't ever want this to end. I don't ever want to lose you."
She could almost hear the desperation in his voice. "You won't," Yui whispered, just holding him. "You'll always have this moment with me; no one can ever take that away."
Upon hearing those words, with a single grunt, he stiffened against her for a moment, moved briefly and stiffened again.
Her concern for the lack of birth control flashed briefly in Yui's mind until she really looked at Gendo's face. The expression she saw there was almost tortured. "Gendo..."
"Everything I am is for you," he said in a voice so low Yui could barely hear it. After that, he pulled away, leaving his arms around her body loosely.
Confused by his behavior, Yui simply looked up into the darkness. There was one definite she found in their act: their love was never to be in doubt again.
She smiled then, arranging herself closer to him so she could hear his deep, even breathing and feel it on her skin. Softly so she didn't wake him, she kissed him, then whispered, "I won't let go."