{These characters are not property of me. I would never attempt to claim them as my own. This story may not be used without my permission, and may not be used to make money in any way, shape or form. Characters and certain situations were created by Rumiko Takahashi, some ideas originated by id Software, so don't try any funny stuff!}
The skies darkened, the seas boiled, the sun... disappeared. A considerable amount of hell broke loose.
Ranma looked up at the sky as the earth trembled beneath his feet. "I wonder if Akane was cookin' again?" he asked no one in particular.
As he leapt away, the ground split asunder and flames belched forth. He didn't see what came out of the huge crack as he left, otherwise he might have stuck around a bit.
People were screaming and running in terror. Things were in complete chaos as the Armageddon seemed to have arrived. Ranma calmly watched from a building top wondering what the big deal was. It wasn't the end of the world really; Akane's cooking wasn't THAT bad.
Then a crowd of people came from around the corner, running like a well-controlled herd. Following them were a group of what could only be described as demons. Large fleshy beasts with sharp teeth and yellow eyes...
Ranma saw one person lag behind the others and be consumed by something vaguely man-like with brown scaly skin. Actually, the poor fall-behind was consumed by several of the humanoids.
In fact, looking around, Ranma could see these demons running around all over the place. There were bodies, parts of bodies, pools of blood everywhere. Hmm. Maybe this wasn't from Akane's cooking after all. Heading back to the dojo would probably be in his best interest.
Leaping from roof to roof, Ranma could hear the screams of the dying, the terrified all around him. It started to get annoying after a while. Things were fine and dandy really until he landed on a roof and it gave way, plummeting him into the house below.
"At least I didn't get wet," Ranma said, pushing some debris off himself. He stood up and dusted himself off, preparing to be on his way again.
That was when the wall exploded (right through a water pipe that sprayed Ranma and turned him female) and a group of ugly monsters charged at him.
Heck, fighting them was something Ranma felt at ease doing. Much better than running and avoiding them. He kicked one stump-legged thing in the face and caved it in. A couple of the brown things came at him, and he got a glimpse of a mouth filled with flames before he hit it, sending a shower of green and red blood into the air.
Twisting instinctively, Ranma felt his back get singed by a burst of flame from another creature. Fortunately, it shot past him to strike another, enraging it. Disposing of a few more beasts allowed Ranma to escape as the others had started battling each other.
He was running along a rooftop, a taller building with numerous windows next to him, concentrating on getting back to the dojo, when a hail of bullets shattered the glass and struck the roof next to his feet. Dancing merrily away, Ranma glanced up and saw a group of soldier-like men with automatic weapons glaring at him from the building with red-rimmed eyes.
OK, so the ugly things wanted to eat him, and the soldier guys wanted to shoot him. What next? As he jumped to the next roof, there was a whooshing sound and a ball of orange and red flames flew past his leg.
"Close one. Guess I have to be more careful," he said to himself. But the whooshing sound grew in volume, and when Ranma looked back, that ball of death was following him. "Why is it always me?" he asked himself and hopped over the flaming mass as it flew past him.
Things were getting a little hairy with flames and fireballs and bullets flying everywhere. Ranma thought he saw... other things flying around, but that was something he felt like avoiding so he had hunkered down until that little magical instinct in him told him it was safe.
Finally, there it was. The house looked unscathed and the yard was still in good shape, almost as if it had managed to avoid the destruction all around it.
Ranma landed in the yard and went right inside. He stopped when he saw the explosion waiting to happen inside: everyone was there. He pushed Shampoo off of him as he walked past, ignored Ukyo's greeting, trying to find someone who could tell him what was going on.
He jumped a little bit as he felt a hand grab his butt and turned around. Figures it would be Kodachi, he thought as he gave her a small frown. At least I hope it was her and not Kuno. He shuddered slightly as he left the crowd of wanna-be fiancees and rivals behind.
Kasumi was sitting at the table looking slightly shell-shocked.
"Yo, Kasumi. What happened?" he asked her.
Kasumi looked at him, her eyes a little wide, but she almost instantly regained her composure. "Why hello Ranma. We were so worried about you."
"I bet. But what happened? It looks pretty bad out there."
"Oh, well, Akane tried to cook dinner, and when the sun got blacked out and Hell started to slowly take over the Earth..."
Ranma's eyes bugged out a little. It WAS Akane's cooking. Wow. he never knew it could be that powerful.
"And none of the stores were open, so we had to make due," Kasumi finished, smiling sweetly.
"Too bad ya didn't cook Mousse..."
"Oh my, no. Akane was heartbroken really, but it had to be done. We had so many hungry guests..."
Ranma shook his head. Uh oh.
"I think there's still some left in the kitchen if you're hungry."
Ranma nodded slowly and went to the kitchen. As he feared, Akane was there, tears still falling from her eyes. She looked at him, her mouth curved downward into a frown. It pierced Ranma to his soul.
"I'm so sorry. If I wouldn't have tried to cook, it would have never..." Akane couldn't finish her sentence and started crying anew.
Ranma looked at the covered plate and shuddered. "Akane, what did you..." He didn't want it to be true, but things didn't look good.
His fingers twitched as he took hold of the paper towel. With a swift pull, he removed the towel and stared at what was there: a small unmistakable black haunch.
"I didn't want to eat poor little P-chan, but we had no other food!" Akane wailed.
The words Ranma had uttered less than three days ago haunted him. 'Ryoga, you suck so bad, I'm gonna eat you alive and spit out the bones.'
Shrugging, Ranma sat down and began to eat.