Note:  This fanfic takes place in the manga continuity of Excel Saga.  
It's a little more realistic than the anime, though just as zany.  The 
only thing that really needs to be known is that Hyatt's not an alien 
princess, just another employee of Across like Excel.  It takes place 
after manga 6, and ignores futures volumes.

Warning:  This fanfic is written by me.  This means that there may be 
moments that are serious.  Despite this, I will try to remain true to 
the characterization Koshi Rikdo has given.  Thanks, and enjoy!


     "HAIL ILPARAZZO-SAMA!!!!  Excel and Hyatt are here to ensure that 
Across become the leaders of the entire I'm 
faaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllliiiiiinnnggggg!!!" Excel said, not even bothering 
to pause or look surprised when Il Parazzo pulled the rope that sent her 
plummeting down into the water below.
     "Hail Il Parazzo-sama," Hyatt finished, raising her hand in a 
salute as best she could.
     "Hyatt," Il Parazzo nodded, letting go of the rope.  From far below 
could be heard the sound of Excel valiantly climbing up the long shaft, 
until she finally popped back up, looking soaked but still incredibly 
perky.  "Got carried away again," she murmured.
     "Listen, the two of you.  We have achieved a great breakthrough.  
If you can achieve this, there will be no stopping Across from stripping 
away its cloak of anonymity and taking the world to a new path.  Our 
firm and guiding hand will be seen to cover the globe, blanketing the 
Earth in its gentle yet firm touch."
     There was a few seconds pause while Excel and Hyatt desperately 
tried to parse this, then Excel simply gave up.  "Okaaaaayyy!!!  Never 
fear, Il Parazzo-sama, you can count on Excel and Hyatt to aaaaigh 
shutting up now, please don't pull it again."  Excel froze as Il 
Parazzo's hand moved towards the rope.
     Hyatt's lips were still moving faintly, trying to figure out what 
her leader had said.  Eventually she spoke.
     "...Hail Il Parazzo-sama."
     Excel hung her head.  "Ha-chan..."
     Il Parazzo seemed to be ignoring their by-play.  Instead, a picture 
flashed up on the wall, showing what seemed to be a small, unassuming 
doorway within the city.
     "This is Avalon, an exclusive nightclub.  The two of you will go 
there tomorrow evening and rendezvous with an employee of the Safety 
Assurance Agency."
     Excel's eyes widened.  "One of the enemy?"
     Il Parazzo smiled thinly.  "She was.  However, she has recently 
become a convert to Across' way of thinking.  She is prepared to risk 
her life and career to give us sensitive, inside information about her 
superiors."
     Excel cheered.  "Once again it's obvious that Il Parazzo's way of 
thinking is the only one for all right-thinking, decent 
peopleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!!!" Excel exclaimed, her speech only being 
cut short by another trip down into the water.
     Hyatt blinked.  "Why doesn't she meet directly with you, Il 
Parazzo-sama?"
     Il Parazzo smiled.  "Good thinking as always, Hyatt.  She is being 
very careful not to act suspicious in any way.  She chose the meeting 
place herself, and ensured that it would be the sort of place no one 
could possibly imagine meeting me."
     Excel had crawled back up by now, and caught the last half of the 
explanation.  "Huh?" she breathed.
     "You'll see when you get there.  Excel, Hyatt... I cannot emphasize 
enough how important this liaison is to Across... and to me.  Do not 
fail this time."
     Excel stood up and saluted proudly, tears coming to her eyes.  "Our 
lives are yours to command, Il Parazzo-sama!  We will not fail you!"
     Hyatt opened her mouth, with a similarly tearful expression.
     "H..."
     And then she coughed, bent over, and fell to the floor, a trickle 
of blood coming from her mouth.
     Excel urked.  "OK, time to get back and get Hyatt her pills!  Fear 
not, Il Parazzo-sama, we shall bring glory to all of Across!"  And with 
that she grabbed her fallen comrade and raced out of the room.
     Il Parazzo sighed, rubbing his temple.
     "I wonder if this will work," he murmured.

***

     Misaki Matsuya walked into the offices of the Safety Assurance 
Agency, tossing her hair back.  it was rare to see her smiling, but she 
had to admit that she felt pretty good about her latest assignment.  Not 
only was it a clever tactical maneuver, but she had made sure that this 
would be a solo operation.  No Sumiyoshi, no Watanabe, and *especially* 
no Iwata.
     As such, she entered the office cheerfully, not even bothering to 
knock.  "I have some good news for you, Directo-WHOOOOAH!"
     She spun around, a blush rising to her cheeks.  "I--are you feeling 
alright, sir?"
     Director Kabapu sat blithely in the center of his office, wearing 
nothing but his excessively trimmed moustache.  He was in the lotus 
position, his hands to his head.  "Misaki-san.  You were saying?"
     Misaki seemed to have lost her train of thought.  "Errr..."
     Luckily, she was interrupted by the door opening, and Secretary 
Momochi appearing.  "Your tea, sir."
     "Just set it down beside me, Momochi-san.  Misaki-san, would you 
like some tea?"
     She shook her head.  "That's OK, I'm not staying long.  I just 
wanted to update you."  She was admiring the finish on the door, it must 
be very expensive wood.
     "The director was just finishing his meditation for the day," 
Momochi said as thought nothing unusual were happening.  As usual, she 
didn't really seem to react to anything.  "Here's your towel, Director."
     Misaki took that as a subtle indication that it was safe to turn 
around.  Sure enough, Kabapu was at least semi-clothed now.  She 
breathed out.
     "After some time, I managed to get through to who I think is the 
head of the organization," she began, becoming all business once again.  
"I was able to convince him that I was willing to betray this Agency for 
the greater glory of his own."
     Kabapu raised an eyebrow.  "Greater glory?"
     Misaki coughed.  "He seemed to believe me more when I used such 
terms.  I think the man has a large Messiah complex."
     The director nodded.  "Go on."
     "I arranged a secret meeting where I would reveal confidential 
information about our operations.  He agreed, and promised to send two 
of his agents to the rendezvous?"
     "Why not come himself," Kabapu mused.  "After all, he must think 
you're important."
     "I made sure the venue was one that he would be noticed if he 
appeared.  I didn't want to seem too suspicious... after all, I'm 
supposedly selling out my colleagues.  I decided it was best to look 
paranoid."
     "Smart thinking, Misaki!  Where will you be meeting?"
     "A club downtown called Avalon."
     Momochi actually turned her head slightly, the closest she got to 
an emotional reaction.  "Avalon?  Isn't that a women-only club?"
     Misaki kept her expression stony, though a smile had reached her 
eyes.  "Yes, it is.  It seemed the perfect meeting-place to ensure 
privacy, and that their esteemed leader wouldn't be joining us.  He's 
sending two of his agents.  Apparently he'd heard of the club himself, 
as he indicated they'd both be women.  I'm supposed to be wearing a red 
carnation to be recognized."
     Kabapu nodded.  "You really should have backup, however..."
     Misaki pretended to look chagrined.  "I know that, sir.  But 
obviously it can't happen, what with the club's demographic.  I should 
be quite capable of handling myself--"
     Momochi interrupted her.  "Director, what about Ropponmatsu?"
     Misaki froze.  Kabapu's brow furrowed.
     "Isn't she underage?"
     "The other Ropponmatsu, Director."
     Misaki started to sweat.  "I thought she was back in the shop, so 
to speak..."
     Momochi beamed.  "Oh, I just got a phone call from Shioji-san this 
afternoon!  Ropponmatsu-ichi has finished her repair and upgrade and is 
ready to come back to working for the SAA full time!"
     Kabapu clapped his hands.  "Perfect!  She can watch discreetly, and 
is powerful enough to take care of any problems in case something goes 
wrong.  Speaking of which, Misaki-san, don't underestimate our 
opponents.  We may have the intellectual advantage but there is no 
denying their pure raw cunning!"
     He had stood up at this last sentence, his eyes gleaming.  
Unfortunately, his towel took that moment to fall to the floor.
     Misaki spun around again.  "Fine, I'll take Ropponmatsu."
     Momochi walked over.  "I'll show you out, Misaki-san."
     After they'd left the Director's office, Misaki hmmphed.  "You did 
that deliberately, didn't you?"
     Momochi's expression didn't change.  "You do need backup, Misaki-
san.  We have no idea what kind of agents the enemy might be sending.  
And you do have a tendency to think you can handle everything..."
     "God, why her?  She's socially inept!  What about..."  Misaki ran 
through her limited choices.  "Hey, what about you?"
     Momochi stopped in the corridor, her face getting even more 
inscrutable.  "I couldn't."
     "Why not," asked Misaki.
     "I might be recognized."
     Misaki paused, her eyes widening.  "Aaaahhh... wow."
     "Wow?"
     "Well, I have to admit, I thought you... um... I thought you had a 
thing for the Director."
     "Oh, I do," Momochi responded cheerfully.
     Misaki suddenly decided that she was learning far too much about 
the young secretary.  "Right.  OK, let's go find Ropponmatsu and bring 
her up to speed..."

***

     Excel leaped into the room, startling a sleeping Menchi.  "All 
right!" she yelled.  "Excel is down with it, and ready to stomp to the 
beat!"
     She was dressed in a pair of hot pink leggings, matching colored 
hot pants, Doc Martens, and a black top cut off halfway down her front, 
leaving her midriff bare.  She was also wearing a pair of Kenneth Cole 
sunglasses, and after half an hour had even managed to figure out how to 
move around in them without smashing things.
     She posed again.  "C'mon, Menchi, tell me the truth.  Am I ready to 
groove or what?"  She started doing some dancing moves.  "You're 
awesome!" she said cheerily.  "I love your style.  Show me how to do 
it!"
     "Do I look covert, Excel-sempai?"
     Excel turned, then sagged against the wall.  Hyatt was dressed in a 
yellow dress that looked almost 100 years old, complete with what might 
have been a corset.  Excel boggled at the thought of Hyatt tightening 
one of those things by herself.
     The effort had clearly taken its toll.  Hyatt was trying to smile, 
but the gouts of blood pouring from her mouth made it seem all the more 
grotesque.  The yellow dress was already ruined.  In addition, she was 
apparently suffering her 'heat stroke' again, as steam was rising from 
her head.
     Excel sighed, and moved forward to catch Hyatt as she fell forward.  
"C'mon, let's try this again..."
     Menchi watched all this with a curious expression, then settled 
back down to sleep.

***

     Eventually Excel got Hyatt into more appropriate attire, and they 
set off for the club.  It was in the middle of the district, in a part 
of the city that was almost low-rent but not quite, just nice enough so 
no one felt nervous.
     At least until they saw the club, and the large muscular woman that 
stood outside the steel door, quizzing everyone who tried to get in.  It 
seemed a very good idea to both Excel and Hyatt not to annoy this woman.
     Excel tried for the breezy 'we're meant to be here' approach, which 
didn't work at all.  A burly forearm caught her on the shoulder and 
flipped her around.  "ID's?"
     "Of course!" said Excel, promptly producing both their licenses.  
The woman stared at Hyatt, and Excel quickly jumped in.  "I'm carrying 
both because she's going to be dancing.  She didn't want to lose it."
     The woman snorted, then continued to examine the licenses.  "Ah.  
It seems you two share the same birthday.  And hair color."
     "Hers is dyed," Excel quickly added.
     "Well, no problem then."  The woman handed the IDs back.  "Those 
seem perfectly sufficient for what they are.  I'm firmly convinced you 
are allowed to drive rickshaws in Bangkok."
     "Eh?" Excel stuttered, and grabbed the IDs.  After a moment she 
started to sweat.  "Ahehehehehe..."
     "I think you two had better go," the woman sent, managing to look 
even more intimidating.
     "No, wait, I just handed you the wrong one, I know I have it here 
somewhere... Ha-chan, did I give them to you by accident?  Um... Ha-
chan?"
     This last was prompted by the rather green pallor on Hyatt's face, 
which looked even worse in the fluorescent light of the streetlamps.  
Hyatt stared vacantly at Excel, then over at the bouncer.  Then she 
hiccuped, and her red lipstick grew even redder.
     "Oh no, not again," Excel murmured.
     The bouncer looked startled.  "Is she all right?"
     "She should be..."  Excel reached for her purse.  "Hang on, I know 
her pills are here somewhere...ah hah!"  Excel grinned and pulled out a 
small pillbox.  Unfortunately, on opening it she found it empty.  "Uh 
oh," she murmured.
     Hyatt coughed, and blood sprayed out from her lips.
     "Oh my god," the bouncer said.  She reached out and caught Hyatt as 
she fell.  "What's the matter with her?"
     "She has this anemia," Excel said quickly.  "It's treatable... I 
just need to get more pills..."
     The bouncer was cradling her while trying to check a pulse.  "God, 
that sounds horrible.  OK, let's get her inside.  We have a doctor, she 
can take a look."
     Excel panicked a bit.  "No!  No doctors!  Ha-chan doesn't like 
doctors, they always want to study her!"
     The bouncer reached out with the hand not holding Hyatt up and 
grabbed Excel by the throat.  "Kid, if we don't get her medical 
attention, she is going to die!  I don't fucking care if she hates 
doctors, we need to get her help!  Now follow me or don't, whatever you 
like."
     She dropped Excel to the ground and began to walk quickly into the 
club.  Excel blinked, then followed.
     "She's going to die in any case," Excel said, but was thankfully 
ignored.

***

     Excel wasn't able to see much of the club proper, as the bouncer 
took a right turn almost as soon as they entered.  Going past several 
offices, they were met by a 40-ish woman with slicked-back hair.  
"Umeno, what the hell?"
     Umeno gave a short head nod.  "Furiko-san, this girl collapsed 
outside the club.  Her friend says she has anemia, and her pulse is 
weak.  We need to get her to Sonoka right away."
     Furiko nodded.  "I'll get someone to cover you at the door.  Take 
her back.  Is this her friend?" she said, nodding at Excel.
     Excel debated telling them the truth again, that Hyatt would be 
fine as soon as she'd had a nice death.  However, she did want to get 
into the club, and was supposed to be undercover.  And she suspected 
that the people around her would react badly.  After all, Excel 
remembered the first time she'd seen Hyatt die.  She's absolutely 
freaked.  It was only when it became an hourly occurrence that she grew 
so blase about it.
     She made a deep bow to the woman, who looked to be the owner of the 
club.  "Yes, I am her friend!  My name is Excel, and I thank you for 
your hospitality!"
     "Excitable, isn't she?  Go, go, we shouldn't be talking like this."  
Umeno nodded, and continued carrying Hyatt down the corridor and into a 
small hospital-like room, with a padded table.
     "Sonoka!  Emergency!" she shouted as they came in and lay Hyatt 
down.  After a short curse, a young woman came out of the anteroom.  
"What is it... what the hell?"  She rushed over to Hyatt and took a 
quick pulse, then cursed again.
     Excel settled back against the wall and took this all in.  She 
needed to think of a new plan of action.  Obviously they weren't going 
to be able to simply blend in anymore.  But she had to get to the club, 
as her contact was due there in half an hour.  If she screwed this up, 
Il Palazzo would never forgive her.
     She also had to work out how to deal with this enemy agent.  Sure 
she was helping them by turning against her peers for the glory of Il 
Palazzo, which is only what any sane person would do once they had been 
introduced to him.  But she was still a traitor no matter which way you 
looked at it, and should be treated with the loathing and contempt all 
traitors deserved.
     Excel became vaguely aware that the big bodyguard, Umeno, was 
slapping her face lightly.  Excel blinked twice and looked over at the 
bed.  Ah, Ha-chan was dead.  Good, they should be able to get started 
soon.
     "I think she's in shock," Umeno was saying to her friend.  "She 
sounded like her friend always recovered before, I doubt she was ready 
for something like this."
     "I'm amazed her friend managed to live as long as she did.  Excel-
san, can you hear me?  I'm sorry, but we need to get some details about 
your friend so we can notify the next-of-kin."
     Excel finally managed to shake herself out of intense thought mode 
and walked over to the table.  She picked up Hyatt's hand and slapped it 
a few times.  "Ha-chan, wake up."
     She felt a hand on her shoulder, trying to pull her away.  "Miss, I 
understand this is a shock, but--"  The voice died off as Hyatt blinked 
and sat up, looking around.  "Oh, did I cause too much trouble?"
     Excel dug out a handkerchief and started wiping Hyatt's mouth free 
of blood.  "Ha-chan, you have to stop doing that.  It really upsets 
people who don't know you."
     "I'm sorry, sempai."  Hyatt straightened her top, and tried to 
pretend nothing had happened.  "Are these your friends, sempai?"
     Excel looked over at the other two, who were staring at Hyatt open-
mouthed.  "Sorry.  She just dies occasionally, I told you that earlier."
     The doctor put a hand to her head, then shook it.  "I can't believe 
it... I just examined her two minutes ago.  Excuse me, miss...?"
     "My name is Hyatt," Hyatt supplied helpfully.
     "Hyatt-san, I apologize for this, but would you mind if I ran a few 
tests on you?  I promise I won't do anything that would make you 
uncomfortable, it's just... well, this seems so incredible."  The doctor 
still sounded dazed.
     Excel frowned.  Her dislike of doctors had mostly to do with the 
weird one who kept kidnapping Hyatt whenever she died to do weird tests 
on her.  This one seemed friendlier, though, and she really needed to go 
off to meet her contact.  She bent over to whisper in Hyatt's ear.
     "Hyatt, if I leave you here with them I can still go meet our 
contact.  Is that OK?  Don't let them tie you to the bed and stick weird 
instruments up you, then take your DNA and splice it to create a giant 
mutant monster that terrorizes Tokyo, where they only way to stop it is 
for me to have to shoot you because you and the monster are 
biotechnically linked through your planar souls, OK?"
     "Oh, I'd never do that again, sempai," Hyatt responded cheerily.
     "Right."  Excel turned back to the doctor.  "I have to go meet our 
friend in your club.  Would it be OK if I left Hyatt here with you while 
I do that?  Then she can join us when you're done."
     Umeno, the bodyguard, scowled.  "Wasn't I about to throw you out 
when this happened?"
     The doctor was smiling, though.  "That would be just fine, Excel-
san."
     "What?  Sonoka!"
     Sonoka walked over and dropped into a hushed conversation with 
Umeno, the upshot of which seemed to be that Umeno grumbled and gave in.  
Then the doctor turned to Excel and spoke in more low tones.
     "Pardon me for intruding, Excel-san, but I'm simply stunned at what 
just happened?  Do you know how this happens to your friend?  I mean, 
she was dead."
     Excel nodded.  "The first few times, I really got upset by it.  I 
asked Il Pal--our supervisor about it once, but he told me not to worry 
about it.  Oh, and he gave me these.  But I've run out... I didn't 
realize till we got here."
     The doctor looked at the bottle.  "Um..."
     "What?"
     "These seem to be Tic-tacs."
     "Really?"  Excel peered at the bottle.  "Wow, these are a lot 
better for you than I thought!  Are hospitals using them as well?"
     The doctor was staring at Excel in a way she'd come to be very 
familiar with.  She gave the bottle back and smiled.  "But that's really 
all I know."
     "Um... yes.  Any strange things happen in her past?  Unusual 
ancestry?"
     "Nope.  She's just like me.  She's only a Martian Princess in the 
anime."
     "What?"
     "Ah, you're interested!  Il P--I mean, our supervisor always has me 
bring along the DVDs just in case.  Let me show you."  Excel reached 
into her purse and pulled out a DVD case, which she handed to Sonoka.
     Umeno peered over her shoulder.  "Excel Saga Volume One?"  She 
looked at her colleague, and then over at Excel who was busy plugging in 
a TV-DVD player system that hadn't been in the corner before.
     After 26 episodes of Excel Saga passed by, the two women were even 
less enthusiastic about being around Excel and Hyatt.  And wondering how 
they'd seen 13 hours of anime in less than 3 seconds.  They turned to 
Excel, who was munching popcorn.
     "It's not bad, but the characterization is way off.  And I think 
they drew Il Palazzo all wrong.  He's much more handsome and gorgeous."
     Excel hopped up.  "Anyway, I have to go meet my contact.  Did I say 
contact?  I meant friend.  Because I'm nothing like the anime, I mean, 
*I'M* not working for the Mysterious Secret Agency ACROSS to take over 
the world, no sir!"  She walked over to Hyatt.  "You be good, and don't 
go dying again!  Not even if they ask you to!  I'll be back right after 
I meet up with our contact."
     "Yes, sempai."  Hyatt smiled.
     Excel smiled and started to leave the room, but was stopped by 
Umeno's large hand on her shoulder.
     "I'm letting you go..."
     "No you aren't," Excel pointed out helpfully.
     The hand tightened, and Excel winced.  "I'm letting you go, 
*but*... you need a bracelet to get into the club.  We'll go pick one up 
at Furiko-san's office."
     "Oh, OK!  Does it come with a free radio/TV/blender/gene splicer 
like the ones in Cracker Jacks?"
     "No."  Umeno leaned over to give Sonoka a quick kiss, then escorted 
Excel out.
     Furiko was on the phone when they got back.  "Did everything work 
out alright?"
     "Um... eventually," the bodyguard replied uncomfortably.  "You 
might want to drop by back there at some point, make sure things are 
working out.  Excel-san has to meet a friend of theirs, so she's going 
down to the club while Sonoka examines Hyatt-san.  She'll be back after 
they rendezvous."
     Furiko raised an eyebrow, but didn't comment.  "Well, she'll need 
to get back here, then.  Give her a gold bracelet."
     "What?!?!  Those are for VIPs!"
     Furiko shrugged.  "I'd rather she went in and out of the offices 
quietly, and the gold passages are the best way to do that."  She 
reached out and took a small gold band off the wall and handed it to 
Excel.  "Wearing this will mean that you can come back here and meet 
your friend.  It also means that you have unrestricted access to the 
entire club.  I'm sure I can trust you not to abuse it, am I right?"
      Excel wriggled nervously.  She'd heard enough implied threats from 
Il Parazzo to know when she was hit with one.  "Of course!  I would 
never dream of abusing the complete and total privilege to go anywhere 
that you're giving me!"
     Furiko smiled.  "Good.  Umeno, take her through the east wing out 
to the main room, then come back here.  I'll leave one of the other 
girls on the door tonight; you stay with Sonoka and watch over Excel-
san's anemic friend."
     Umeno nodded, and went back out into the hallway with Excel, who 
was strapping the bracelet around her right wrist.  "There are separate 
entrances and exits into the main room for important clients.  They have 
gold trim.  We'll use those.  Here's Sonoka's room..."
     "Hello, sempai!"
     "Hi, Ha-chan!"
     Umeno sighed.  "From here, you take a right, then go by 2 doors to 
get to the main room.  It's the large double door.  Got that?"
     Excel nodded.  "Go right, 2 doors down, large double door."
     "Don't cause any disturbances, don't get into any fights, and if 
someone tells you no, accept it - or else."
     Excel blinked.  "Okaaaay..."
     Umeno stopped with her hand on the door.  She stared at Excel for a 
moment.  "You know, I'm starting to believe that you really don't know 
where you are."
     "Of course I do," Excel said.  "This is Avalon, the hot new 
exclusive club for young women!"
     "That's right.  And it's exclusively for women too."  Seeing no 
reaction in Excel's eyes, she continued.  "This is a place for women to 
meet other women.  Intimately."
     Excel blinked twice more, then her eyes widened.  Umeno smiled, 
pulled the doors open, and thrust Excel through them.  "Knock yourself 
out," she called after.

***

     Misaki looked around the club to try to spot her contact.  There 
wasn't really any way she could find out - she had to be approached 
first, that was part of the deal she'd made with the enemy's 
organization.  Still, she scoped out the room anyway, noting the easy 
exits and useful potential weapons in case things turned nasty.
     Plus she had Ropponmatsu with her, who was practically a walking 
arsenal in herself.  Misaki was dressed in a men's tuxedo, tailored to 
fit her own ample figure, with the pre-agreed red carnation in place.  
Ropponmatsu, of course, was dressed as she always was, in her simple 
women's business attire.  She hadn't even taken off her headband.  
Misaki wondered if she could.
     Misaki decided to settle at the bar, and ordered a Coke.  "Do you 
drink?" she asked Ropponmatsu, as politely as she could.
     Ropponmatsu nodded.  "Shioji-sama says I shouldn't drink alcohol, 
but I'm fully capable of ingesting other liquids.  I can urinate as 
well."
     Misaki winced.  "All right, about one sentence too long there, but 
thank you.  I'm not drinking either, we need to be at our best tonight."  
She did order another Coke from the bartender, however.
     A sultry young redhead - well, badly dyed red hair - walked up to 
Ropponmatsu.  Uh oh, Misaki thought.
     "Hi there, cutie.  My named Keiko.  What's yours?"
     "We're really not interested--" Misaki began to say.
     "Excuse me, was I talking to you.  No, I don't think I was.  So why 
are you talking to me?"  The frost in the girl's voice made Misaki 
shiver.
     She turned back to Ropponmatsu.  "I don't really like the 
atmosphere in here.  Would you like to go somewhere else?  We could 
talk, find out a little bit about ourselves."
     Ropponmatsu blinked and looked over at Misaki, who considered it.  
Ropponmatsu was certainly in no danger.  Plus if she refused, the woman 
might cause a scene, which was the last thing Misaki wanted.  Of course, 
there was also the possibility that the woman would try to take things 
further, but Ropponmatsu wasn't stupid.  She would be able to stop Keiko 
if anything like that happened.
     So Misaki decided to simply shrug, an indication that Ropponmatsu 
could do whatever she wanted.  Ropponmatsu shrugged as well, and rose 
from the stool.  Keiko took her hand, in a manner far too rough for 
Misaki's liking.  "Now what was your name?"
     "Ropponmatsu," said the android as they walked off towards one of 
the doors trimmed with purple.
     "Wonderful!  What do you do?  You look like someone who works with 
her hands..."
     As they walked away Misaki sighed.  Already things weren't going as 
planned.  Oh well.  At least now she was alone, which was what she 
wanted in the first place.
     She sipped at her soda.  Now if only her contact would get here...

***

     Excel frowned.  She looked out at the main room, trying to look as 
nonchalant as possible.  People had looked over at her for a moment when 
Umeno had thrown her out, but then turned back to their dancing and 
socializing.
     If Excel had been paying any attention, she might have been 
surprised at the layout of the club.  It was very low-key, with a piano 
player back along one wall, and lots of 'conversation nooks' rather than 
open areas.  There was a bar up towards the north, and exits trimmed in 
purple at the corners and gold at the sides.
     Excel noticed none of this, as she really needed to use the 
bathroom.  She looked around.  There was a sign over by the entrance 
hallway, but as she headed over there she wondered whether she was 
supposed to use it.  She looked at her hand.  She had a gold bracelet, 
she was one of the VIP customers.  VIPs likely had their own special 
toilets, made of bronze or somesuch.  And she had to keep up 
appearances.
     So she turned to her right, and went over towards the set of double 
doors opposite where she'd come in.  Another tough-looking woman like 
Umeno glanced over at her, but saw her bracelet and looked back out at 
the club.  Excel smiled and went through the double doors, coming across 
an identical corridor to the last one she'd been in.
     She looked around, but in here all the doors seemed rather 
anonymous.  No obvious facilities around.  Well, she'd just work 
backwards from Umeno's directions, see where that took her, and find the 
bathroom by process of elimination.
     She held a pointing finger out in front of her.  "Go right, two 
doors down.  So here I need to go LEFT and then go two doors UP."  She 
turned her finger to the left, and began following it.

***

     Umeno slipped back inside Sonoka's office, smiling at seeing her 
lover trying to industriously get as much information as she could about 
Hyatt without actually doing anything to her.
     She slipped an arm over her shoulder.  "Back," she said, kissing 
Sonoka's ear.
     "That was quick.  Furiko send you back here?"
     "Mmm-hm.  I think she wanted both of us to watch over our new 
guest."
     "And what about Excel?  I'd have thought you'd be chained to her 
wrist all evening."
     Umeno frowned.  "Furiko gave her a gold bracelet, told her not to 
abuse it, and had me let her into the main area."
     Sonoka blinked.  "You're kidding."
     "Nope.  I think Furiko's getting involved in another web of mayhem 
and intrigue again."
     "Wonderful.  Definitely best to stay in here, then."
     "Oh yeah."  Umeno looked over at Hyatt, who was smiling vacantly at 
them.  She pulled Sonoka into her inner office.  "Be right back," she 
told Hyatt, who nodded happily.
     "What's up with her?" she asked after the door closed.
     Sonoka sighed.  "I asked her if I could take some blood, and she 
agreed.  She'd never had experience with needles before... she said 
other times she apparently just coughed up enough for a sample.  Other 
than that... she's been like this since she turned ten, she's had 
several doctors looking after her, and she genuinely doesn't seem to 
care that this is happening to her.  She's utterly matter of fact about 
the fact that she just dies several times a day."
     Umeno looked down.  "That the sample?"
     "Mmm.  Was about to take a look."
     They walked out and saw Hyatt, who had stood up from the table and 
was curiously looking around the room.  "This is a lovely hospital you 
have here," she said.
     "It's not really a hospital, just a room where we take care of 
clients in case of accidents or other such things.  It's fairly well 
outfitted, though, thank you."  She set the blood sample up on a slide.  
"Oh, I knew I forgot to ask something.  Do you take any medications?  
Your friend had a pill bottle, but I think she must have grabbed the 
wrong one."
     Hyatt smiled.  "Oh, Il Palazzo gave that to sempai.  He told me it 
would reassure her."  She reached into her bag.  "This is what a doctor 
told me to take daily."  She pulled out a long piece of paper, unfolded 
it till it was much longer, then gave it to Sonoka.
     Sonoka read it.  "Urk," she said quietly.
     Umeno looked over.  "Glk," she added.
     "Is there something wrong?" Hyatt inquired.
     Sonoka looked up.  "You take this daily?"
     "Oh yes.  I know it seems like a lot, but Il Palazzo has 
supplemented my insurance benefits, so pharmacies are very friendly with 
me."
     "I wasn't really thinking of the monetary aspect of it... this much 
medication would kill anyone before they'd even taking half of it.  In 
fact, I see at least six drugs here that are lethal when combined with 
each other."
     "Oh no," Hyatt said.
     Umeno looked at Hyatt suspiciously.  "Is this some sort of setup?  
You aren't trying to scam us or anything, are you?"
     "I don't think so... sempai would have told me if I was supposed to 
trick you."
     Sonoka meanwhile had somewhat dazedly put down the list of 
medications and gone to look at the blood sample.  "What the HELL?" she 
cried.
     Umeno looked over with a resigned expression.  "Somehow I knew it 
would be too easy for her to simply be a scam artist.  What's up?"
     "I think I've figured out why the drugs have trouble affecting 
anything in her body.  Her entire body appears to be one big drug 
cocktail.  There's also a lot of stuff I don't really recognize... my 
god, how did you grow up?  Were your parents this way?"
     "Oh good heavens no," Hyatt said.  "They were both wonderful.  They 
let me see lots of scientists, and they'd get lots of money for it.  
Then I would get ice cream.  I had a perfect childhood."
     There was a loud snap from Umeno's direction, and Sonoka looked up 
startled.  Umeno was holding the arm of the chair she'd been gripping, 
her lips thin.  "That does sound interesting.  By the way, what were 
your parents' names?"
     Before Hyatt could answer, Sonoka stood and grabbed her lover's 
arm.  "Umeno, *no*."
     Umeno growled.  "Were you listening to the same story I was?"
     "Yes, I was.  But Hyatt-san obviously doesn't hold it against them.  
And she's old enough that we have no right to make those decisions for 
her.  *Leave it*."
     Umeno stared at her for a few more moments, then seemed to crumple 
a bit and nodded.  Sonoka smiled and kissed her briefly - well, it was 
meant to be brief but for some reason it simply went on for a minute or 
two.
     After finally parting, Umeno turned to Hyatt and coughed.  "Sorry 
about that."
     Sonoka blinked.  "Why on earth are you apologizing?"
     "Her friend Excel-san apparently never knew this was a lesbian 
club... so I suspect Hyatt-san doesn't either."
     "If they didn't know what kind of club it was, why were they coming 
here?" Sonoka asked.
     "Search me."
     Suddenly, Hyatt coughed.  Both women froze and looked over at her.  
Hyatt stood there, a hand clasped to her mouth.  Her face had turned 
pale green.
     "Oh my god," Umeno said.
     Sonoka was at her side.  "Cough, don't worry about it.  Don't keep 
it all bottled up."  She grabbed a basin from the floor, which Hyatt 
obligingly coughed a small gout of blood into.
     "Umeno, get over here and keep her vertical.  If she wants to vomit 
or cough, let her.  Watch her temperature, I need to get my things."  
She ran into her office, leaving Umeno to catch Hyatt as she fell.
     "Whoah, kiddo, that's it... stay upright."  Hyatt tried to nod, but 
that seemed to make her tilt forward.  Umeno threw an arm across her 
front as well, noting idly that Hyatt's nipples were noticeably erect.  
She mentally cursed herself and went back to making sure Hyatt wasn't 
any closer to death.
     "Back," Sonoka said, putting a stethoscope to Hyatt's chest.  "My, 
aren't you pleased to see us," she noted idly.  "OK, well, your 
heartbeat seems OK... tell me, do you always react as badly as you do 
when you get these fits?  Or are there lesser symptoms?"
     Hyatt opened her mouth, then simply wilted, collapsing into Umeno's 
arms like a dead weight.
     "Dammit!  Lie her back on the table."  Sonoka breathed into Hyatt's 
mouth, then thumped her chest.  She waited for a reaction.  "Nothing.  
Trying again..."  She did, then checked.  Hyatt lay still, her eyes wide 
and unseeing.
     Sonoka stared at Hyatt, tears coming to her eyes.  "Shit!" she 
cried.  Umeno hugged her.
     They stayed like that for a moment, and then Hyatt's eyes fluttered 
and she sat up.  "I'm sorry.  Did I upset you again?"
     This time it only took a second or two for Sonoka to come to terms 
with the fact that the young girl who had died in her arms moments ago 
was now alive once more.  "OK, Hyatt-san, if you could lie back on the 
table?  I want to see how you are right after... um, right after you get 
better, so to speak."
     Hyatt nodded and lay back.  Sonoka quickly took another blood 
sample and went to put it under the microscope.  "Ah hah!"
     "What is it?"
     Sonoka smiled over at Umeno.  "Her blood has far fewer poisons in 
it right after she's recovered than it did earlier."
     Umeno stared.  "So her body is rejecting the poisons by having her 
cough them up until she dies, then having her recover after they're 
gone."
     "Exactly!"
     "How?"
     "Not a clue."  Sonoka shrugged.  She turned back to the sample.  
"That's odd..."
     "Now what?" Umeno said.
     "Well, I'm starting to think her blood isn't the direct poison.  It 
has traces, but not enough to be the source."  She tapped her finger on 
the microscope.  "Sweat?  Saliva?  Hrm... Hyatt-san?"
     Hyatt now seemed fully recovered... or at least as recovered as she 
ever was.  "Yes?"
     "When you get these attacks... how do you feel before they happen?  
Is there anything you do, anything you see?"
     Hyatt blinked.  "Well..."
     Sonoka walked up to her.  "Wait one moment.  Lie back and relax.  I 
have an idea.  Hyatt-san, do you trust me?"
     "Of course."
     "I want to hypnotize you.  If I do that, I think I can keep you 
calm and relaxed enough that you can tell me how you feel during your 
attacks without the danger of them happening again."
     "Oh.  All right.  How does it work?"
     With some help from Umeno, Sonoka was able to put Hyatt under,  she 
lay on the table, staring at the ceiling.
     "Now Hyatt-san, I want you to stay relaxed as you answer my 
questions.  Nothing frightens you, nothing excites you... all you feel 
is calm.  Do you understand me?"
     "Yes."
     "Now, when did you have your first attack?"
     "I was ten years old.  The scientist man had just given me a pill 
that had made me sick."
     "Sick how?"
     "I bled a little from my legs, and my insides hurt."
     Umeno blinked.  "You're kidding.  How sheltered was she?"
     "Shh.  Hyatt-san, how soon after the first time you bled did you 
first have an attack like you have now?"
     "It was six months later.  My friend showed me a magazine, and 
there were naked people in it."
     "Ah hah.  And this made you sick?"
     Hyatt nodded, but still seemed to be calm.  "Yes.  My friend got 
very upset, and her parents wouldn't let her play with me any more.  
They said I was possessed by a demon."
     Umeno emitted another low growl.  Sonoka continued the questioning.  
"How often did you have the attacks after that?"
     "I had them every week or so."
     "But not several times a day?"
     "No."
     "When did they get so frequent?"
     "When I first joined ACROSS."
     "The place you and Excel work for?  Is that where you met Excel?"
     "Yes.  Il Palazzo introduced us."
     Sonoka stepped away for a moment.  "Her boss... the one Excel 
obsesses over.  I wonder if Hyatt is the same way."
     Umeno rubbed her temples.  "I can't believe what I'm hearing."
     "Hyatt-san, how do you feel about Il Palazzo?"
     "He's a wonderful man.  He wants to help everyone so much.  I love 
working for him."
     "Does he make you feel any odd feelings?  Does your pulse race, do 
you feel light-headed or warm?"
     "Oh no, it's nothing like when I'm with sempai."
     Sonoka stopped.  She looked at Umeno and then looked down at Hyatt.  
"You feel that way when you're around Excel?"
     "Oh yes."
     They stood back once more.  "Bing," Sonoka said.
     "Wonderful.  So she poisons herself whenever she gets aroused, and 
she's around a woman who apparently does nothing but arouse her."  Umeno 
was still rubbing her temples.
     "That would seem to be it.  The poison is activated when she feels 
horny, then it contaminates the blood and adrenal glands, just making 
things worse.  I still have no clue how she recovers after all this.  
Maybe the 'friendly scientists' gave her another pill that enables her 
to recover from death-like states."
     Sonoka frowned, and walked over to Hyatt.  "Hyatt-san, did the 
scientist men ever talk to you about the pills they gave you?"
     Hyatt nodded.  "Oh yes.  They always told me exactly what each pill 
would do to me.  They said they had to tell me so they could stay 
ethical."
     Sonoka's eyebrow was starting to twitch as well, and she grabbed 
Umeno's hand.  "Do you remember what they told you about the pill you 
took right before your period... um, before the first time you bled?"
     Hyatt's face scrunched up for a moment.  "They said it was to 
suppress my desires.  I was supposed to feel sick whenever I had certain 
feelings, and it would help me to not have them.  They were upset, 
because apparently it made me sicker than they wanted... they gave me 
another pill after that that helped me get better, though."
     Umeno sat in the chair, tapping at the remains of the armrest she 
had damaged.  "I'm starting to feel that going after these scientists 
might be more dangerous than I'd really like."
     Sonoka nodded.  "Me too.  Hyatt, were they upset because you ended 
up getting so sick you'd die?"
     Hyatt nodded.  "Yes.  They said it was pointless, because either 
way of recovery involved death."
     Sonoka blinked.  "'Either way of recovery'?  Hyatt, what did they 
mean?"
     "I don't know."
     Sonoka tapped her fingers against the table.  she walked over to 
talk to Umeno.  "OK, they're working on a desire suppressant, but it 
goes too far, and ends up nearly killing her.  They're able to give her 
something that helps her body expel the poison and helps her recover."
     "Right," Umeno agreed.  "She recovers by dying."
     "But they said she could recover another way.  How else could the 
poison kill her?"
     There was silence for a few moments, then there was a knock at the 
door.  Furiko stepped into the room.  "How are we getting on here?"
     Sonoka stood up.  "Poorly.  Have you been listening?"
     Furiko smiled.  "Always.  I decided to drop by because I thought I 
could help."
     "Help how?" Umeno asked.
     "Hyatt's 'death' provides enough of a catastrophic reaction for the 
body to temporarily expel the poison she created by getting aroused.  In 
a sense, it is genuinely helping her arousal."
     "I wouldn't call it help..."
     "Well, then try another tack.  What if Umeno-chan was aroused?  How 
would you help her?"
      Sonoka blinked.  "No need to die there, I'd just..."  She stopped, 
staring at Furiko.  "You're kidding."
      "I don't believe so.  I think that might be the answer.  Remember, 
it's called 'the little death' by some.  That would explain the 
scientists' remarks."
     Umeno rose from her seat.  "How is that supposed to help her?  She 
gets aroused, she poisons herself, she dies.  There's not really a lot 
of room for a quickie."
     "Not a lot, no, but some.  Especially when she's as relaxed as 
this."  Furiko walked over to Hyatt, who was still staring at the 
ceiling in a trance.  "Hyatt-san?"
     "Yes?"
     "It's possible we can help you with this problem.  Would you like 
us to help you?"
     "I suppose so..."
     "After all, if you get better you could actually be with Excel-san.  
You wouldn't need to worry about how you feel around her.  Wouldn't that 
be wonderful?"
     Hyatt smiled.  "Oh, that sounds lovely."
     "But in order to help you, we might have to experiment a bit.  
We'll probably have to touch you quite a bit, intimately.  Do you mind 
that?  I promise we wouldn't do anything that would permanently hurt 
you... and it would help you a lot in the end."
     Hyatt's brow furrowed.  "I'm not sure whether Il Palazzo would 
approve... he's always told me I have to keep myself pure."
     Furiko reached into a pocket and pulled out a small piece of paper.  
"Hyatt-san, I want you to read this.  What does it say?"
     Hyatt took the paper and her eyes focused on it.  "August 5, 1997.  
This certifies that Furiko Izumi is licensed to practice medicine to 
treat members of ACROSS.  In this she is allowed unlimited authority to 
keep ACROSS employees alive and viable.  Il Palazzo has signed it."
     Furiko took back the paper, ignoring the open-mouthed stares of her 
employees.  "So you see, Il Palazzo has authorized me to help you.  That 
paper says so."
     "You're right."
     "So are we allowed to help you?"
     "Yes, please."  Hyatt smiled, and her eyes closed briefly.  "I want 
to be closer to sempai."
     Furiko nodded.  "Then we'll help."  She turned back to her stunned 
colleagues.  "Umeno, Sonoka, I need to ask that you don't tell anyone 
else about this."
     "Um..." Umeno stuttered a response.  "About the letter, or about 
the fact that we're going to bring her to orgasm in order to cure her?"
     "Yes," Furiko said simply, and removed her jacket.

***

     Misaki frowned.  Her contact was running late.  She'd been here for 
half an hour now, and no one had approached her at all.  Which was not 
only annoying in terms of the assignment, but was a slight blow to her 
ego, even though she wasn't a lesbian.  She found herself checking 
herself idly in the mirror above the bar, making sure she didn't have 
anything stuck in her teeth or something.
     Ropponmatsu suddenly appeared next to her, making Misaki jump.  
"That was quick," she commented.
     The android shrugged.  "She didn't want to talk."
     "I'd gathered that," Misaki said dryly.
     "So we merely pleasured each other until she was satisfied.  She 
was... adequate, I suppose."
     Misaki almost choked on her drink.  "You had sex with her?"
     "Isn't that what I should have done?  This is a lesbian club, 
correct?  And we're trying to remain inconspicuous."
     "How in god's name is it that you're able to have sex?  You're an 
android."
     Ropponmatsu picked up her drink and sipped.  "My creator is a 
pervert."
     After a moment, Misaki shrugged and leaned back against the bar.  
"That's true enough."
     "Have you met with the agent from ACROSS yet?"
     "No, she's late.  Although this might be her now," Misaki said 
brightly, seeing a blonde woman walking in their direction.
     Unfortunately, the blonde veered to the left, and immediately 
latched onto Ropponmatsu.  "Hiya.  My make's Yuki.  Do you want to go 
somewhere and talk?"
     "Do you want to talk?  Or is that merely a polite euphemism for 
wanting to have sex with me?"
     "It's polite, I want to have sex with you."  The woman hadn't even 
blinked.
     "All right."  And they got up and walked off, in a different 
direction than Ropponmatsu had first gone.  Misaki stared after them for 
a few moments.
     "She waved a hand.  "Bartender, can you refresh my Coke?  And add 
some rum?"

***

     Excel was still wandering around the halls of the club, getting 
incredibly lost.  She had fortunately managed to find a bathroom about 4 
or 5 doors along, but then she turned left again and somehow ended up 
going down a ramp, and there weren't any staircases to get her back up a 
level.  She then backtracked, but the ramp wasn't where it had been, and 
the lighting wasn't as good either.  And the doors had gotten much much 
thicker, with some sort of insulation on the inside.
     Oh well, this was probably the secret part of the club, where women 
were chained to tables and tortured by the use of various devices until 
they were screaming in a combination of pain and exquisite pleasure...
     Excel shook her head.  She'd been watching far too much Cinemax 
lately.  Her body was still virginal and pure, for Il Palazzo's loving 
and adventurous hands only to use and abuse and toss aside like tissue 
paper.
     She sighed and noticed another door, with quite a few bolts and 
locks on it.  Maybe this was a door to the back of the building, and she 
could double around the front.  She unsnapped and unbolted and then 
opened the door.
     Inside was a dungeon.  But it also wasn't.  Certainly the decor was 
very Inquisition-ey, with lots of chains, whips, and a rack attached to 
the wall.  The rack appeared to have silk bindings, though.  And the 
large king-sized bed on the south wall was far too fluffy and pink to 
qualify as a device of pure evil, unless you didn't like cute things.
     There was a young woman with one arm handcuffed to the bed.  She 
sat in bra and panties, looking fairly morose and staring over at the 
array of weapons in the corner.  As the door closed after Excel, the 
girl started and turned around.
     "Hi!" Excel waved, trying to act as nonchalant as possible.  "I got 
lost.  Do you know how to get to the main room from here?"
     The woman blinked.  "Start as a janitor and work your way up?"  She 
shook her head violently, and Excel relaxed a little.  This seemed like 
someone who might communicate on her wavelength.
     "Sorry," the woman laughed.  "You need to go 7 doors down on your 
right, and there's a ramp back up to the main level.  How'd you get down 
here, anyway?"
     "Looking for the bathroom and got lost," Excel admitted.  "They 
gave me one of these," she said, holding up her wrist.  "I think they 
need to work some kind of map in here, or maybe a homing device so that 
you could trigger something and be able to see where you were.  I have 
that in my uniform when I'm working for Il Palazzo, and there was a time 
we--HHHRK!"
     Excel's rambling monologue was suddenly cut off as the woman 
slipped out of her handcuffs, jumped over to Excel and slammed her back 
up against the rack.  It was made of wood, Excel noted, and quite 
painful when a body hit it with force.
     "You work for ACROSS?!" the girl snarled.  Her demeanor was utterly 
different now, though Excel noticed she didn't seem so much angry or 
murderous as scared out of her wits.  "Did he send you here?  He said we 
could all go, that he never wanted to see us again!  Furiko said we were 
free!  I won't go back, do you hear me?"
     Excel felt a small trickle of sweat work its way down her spine.  
She tried following what the girl had said.  She failed completely.  
"What are you talking about?"  Then her eyes suddenly lit up.  "Wait, 
are you my contact?  The one with all the top secret information?  What 
are you doing down here?  No, wait, you can't be the contact, the 
contact was supposed to give out top secret information to us, not give 
out our top secret information, and besides, we were supposed to meet up 
in the main room, unless you're trying to double cross me, and you 
somehow made me need to go to the bathroom so you could lure me down 
here..."
     Smoke was starting to rise from Excel's brain.  The woman released 
her from the chokehold and stood back.  "God, you sound just like I 
did..." she murmured.  "I wonder if... nah, that's a little too 
conspiracy even for me."
     Excel danced back and forth, trying to get circulation back into 
her brain.  "Um, why were you trying to kill me, if you don't mind my 
asking?"
     She waved a hand, still lost in thought.  "Oh, I used to work for 
ACROSS."
     Excel brightened.  "You did?  How long ago?  Did you work for Il 
Palazzo?  What was he like then?  Oh my god, that's why you got upset!  
You must have been one of Il Palazzo's many and varied lovers, and were 
never able to recover after he threw you over for a younger, cuter 
model!  God, I'm so jealous!  What was he like?  Did he make long, slow, 
hot passionate love to you over and over again until you were begging 
for mercy?"  Excel sighed happily, a little drool running down her chin.
     The girl stared at Excel for a long moment.  Then she sighed.  "I 
imagine he was much the same when I was working for him as he is now.  I 
was a lot like you, I suppose.  I was utterly devoted to Il Palazzo, and 
tried my hardest to achieve his plan of world conquest.  Every move I 
made, for two years, I made for him.  I ate, slept and breathed for Il 
Palazzo.  And through that time, he would drop me in pits, or shoot me, 
or forget that I even existed."
     Excel stared at the girl, starting to sweat a little.  "This is 
sounding a little *too* familiar..." she said, but the girl went on, not 
seeming to hear her.
     "And all that time, there was another... but I couldn't see her.  
Couldn't see what she was feeling... what we were both feeling, I 
suppose.  Il Palazzo is a shining light, Excel, the kind that acts as a 
beacon to anyone around him.  But if you stare at him too long, you 
can't see even the simplest things right by your side."
     The girl sat back on the bed, putting her head in her hands.  "I 
loved Il Palazzo, and I loved working for ACROSS.  That was the problem.  
So... even though I've ended up losing everything, I don't regret it.  I 
don't regret leaving."
     She looked up at Excel, and smiled.  "I'm sorry.  I shouldn't be 
doing this sort of thing.  My name is Saki, by the way."
     Excel continued to stare nervously at her, but shook herself out of 
it.  "I'm Excel.  Wait, no, I need to use my cover name.  Except I've 
forgotten it.  Dammit, why can't I have picked an easier name to 
remember?  OK, you can call me Excel, but when I leave, you have to 
forget all about it.  You can just call me that strange girl, lots of 
people do that.  Actually, come to think of it, you probably shouldn't 
be talking about me at all, because I'm supposed to be on a secret 
mission, though I suppose it's not so secret anymore now that I already 
know you used to be in ACROSS, and you know I am, and Hyatt's upstairs 
getting taken care of by the doctors, so really the whole thing's fallen 
apart again as it always seems to, but we have to keep up appearances 
anyway, so I'd appreciate it if you called me Excel but only till I get 
out of here then you don't refer to me at all and everything will be OK.  
All right?"
     There was a short pause while Saki moved her lips, repeating 
various bits of Excel's ramblings to herself.  Then she smiled.  "All 
right, Excel."
     Excel smiled, and sat down on the bed.  "So you don't work for 
ACROSS anymore.  Do you work here?"  Excel's eyes widened, and she 
suddenly nudged herself further along the bed.
     Saki sighed.  "Excel, just because I work here doesn't mean I'm 
going to seduce you.  Relax, your purity is still Il Palazzo's to use 
and abandon."
     "Um... sorry..." Excel stammered out.  "So what do you do?" she 
asked, looking around at the various paraphenalia.
     Saki shook her head.  "Not this.  I'm normally a hostess in the 
main room... and yes, I'm *only* a hostess.  This was... this was 
supposed to be something special.  But it didn't work out, so never 
mind."
     Excel looked at Saki some more, then frowned.  "Hhhmmm..."
     For a moment, nothing was said.  Then Excel began to get curious 
again.  "You know... I think you left ACROSS a little too soon.  I know 
Il Palazzo better than anyone.  He's just very shy about showing his 
affection.  The pit, and the guns, those are his ways of expressing the 
love he can't reveal through words."
     Far from cheering up Saki, this seemed to make her even more 
depressed.  "We really are alike..."
     Excel wasn't quite sure what to say to that.  She was starting to 
wonder if perhaps Il Palazzo might still have feelings for Saki.  After 
all, she used to fill Excel's position in ACROSS.  Could it be the 
reason that Il Palazzo had never passionalte taken Excel to his bed and 
ravished her over and over again until she was screaming for mercy was 
because he was still nursing his broken heart?
     "For the longest time, Excel, I was confused by love.  Love to be 
was Il Palazzo's love, the harsh kind.  The abuse, and the cruel words, 
all tricks to hide his real feelings.  But he was very good at the 
tricks.  In all the time that I was there, he never outwardly showed 
anything but contempt and hatred for me.  But it was all right.  Because 
that was love."
     Saki lay back, and continued, tears coming to her eyes.  "And when 
I was around someone who was always kind to me... who always considered 
my feelings and never put her own first... someone who watched as I 
stupidly kept going back to Il Palazo for more abuse again and again... 
I didn't see it.  She was my best friend, of course.  Kindness, caring, 
someone who understood everything I was thinking... that was a friend.  
It wasn't love."
     Excel felt like she should say something, but nothing was coming to 
mind.  Her mind was trying to wrap itself around what Saki was saying, 
and it wasn't very happy with it.  In fact, there were some dark, evil 
thoughts in Excel's mind at the moment, and she pushed them back out of 
the way before they turned into ideas.
     Saki was utterly unhelpful, continuing on, though the words were 
starting to get buried under a stream of crying.  "And then Furiko 
helped us all to leave... and helped me to understand that I was all 
mixed up... that what I thought was love... and friendship..."  She took 
in a deep, shuddering breath.  "So I got this job, and slowly started 
putting together a life.  A real life, with people acting with genuine 
caring.  I had friends, and felt respected.  And I thought... I thought 
that maybe it was the time to try to resolve things.  To show that I had 
learned, and now knew what my true feelings were."
     At this point Saki simply stopped talking, and lay on the bed 
crying.  Excel shifted nervously, knowing she should offer some sort of 
condolences, but also not wanting to interrupt.  She didn't really know 
the girl that well, anyway, aside from her apparently being a carbon 
copy of Excel herself.  Well, except for physical appearances, and basic 
personality, and things like that.
     Saki stood, and walked over to the rack, slowly fingering the 
restraints.  "Look at this.  Even when I was trying to do the right 
thing, I was still stupid.  I set this all up so she could tie me up, 
and abuse me, and get revenge on me for the way I always treated her.  
No wonder she never showed up.  I still don't even know what love is."
     "Actually, I think you may just have finally figured it out."
     Excel spun around on hearing the voice in the doorway, and then 
stepped back a bit.  A tall blonde stood leaning against the doorway, 
her head docked to one side.  Her hair fell over one eye, but the other 
was shining.
     Excel turned back to Saki, who had gone sheet white.  "Arisa..." 
she murmured.
     Excel blinked.  "Wait, *this* is your friend?"  When she had been 
hearing the story, for some reason Excel had been imagining a totally 
different person.  Someone shy, and softspoken... a lot more like Hyatt.  
This woman, though, looked as if she could fold Excel in half and toss 
her through the wall.  Indeed, the look she was giving Excel right now 
promised just that.
     On turning back to Saki, however, the look softened.  "You never 
needed to do this.  You never needed to do anything.  I would always 
have been waiting for you."
     Saki still stood a few feet away.  "It can't just be like that.  
After all my ignorance... you putting up with me for all these years... 
why is it that you think everything can just be okay?"
     Arisa walked slowly up to her friend, and pulled her into a deep 
kiss.  Excel watched for a moment, a blush coming to her face, then 
looked away again.  *This place is really bringing out the worst in me,* 
she thought.
     After a long while, they parted.  Arisa spoke softly again.  "Do 
you think I wanted you to change?  Why do you think I fell in love with 
you?"
     Saki stared at her, and then pulled her down to kiss her again.  
This went on for quite some time, until the two of them stumbled across 
the floor and landed on the bed.  Arisa flipped Saki up into the air, 
removed her bra in one motion, then pulled her back down.
     Excel's eyes bugged out, and she began to sidle towards the exit.  
She was stopped by an arm across the door just before she left.  Arisa 
had gotten up from the bed and was now staring at Excel with fire in her 
eyes.  "So what will you be saying about us once you leave here?"
     Excel gulped, watching the arm flex casually.  "Um... nothing at 
all?"
     This startled Saki, who lay on the bed, an arm covering her 
breasts.  "You heard everything?"
     Arisa nodded, but kept talking to Excel.  "And in return, of 
course, we won't mention what you're doing here."
     To be honest, the whole secret mission had fled from Excel's mind 
after seeing the kissing and nudity.  "I thank you!"
     Arisa stared at Excel for a few seconds more.  "You really are like 
her.  I pity you.  You don't know what you're doing to yourself."
     Excel blinked.  "What?"
     The arm retreated.  "Saki and I are going to make love now.  Get 
out."
     And suddenly Excel was in the hallway again, and the door slammed 
in her face.
     Excel stood there for a few seconds, then her brain switched into 
'I must not think too deeply on such matters' mode.  "Okaaay!  Now to 
find the way back to the main room!  Um... what did she say was the 
right way?"

***

     Furiko sighed, looking over at Hyatt.  She hated not being in 
complete control of any situation.  This young woman was a complication, 
and helping her would only bring further ones.  At the same time, she 
couldn't stand by and see a potentially happy relationship ruined by 
morally bankrupt scientists and power-mad... well, best not to go there.
     Unfortunately, it looked like she might have to go there.  Sonoka 
had taken her arm in a brutal grip.  "Furiko-san?"
     She sighed.  "You want to know about ACROSS, then."
     Umeno was shaking her head.  "The girl showed us something, but... 
an anime?  You mean to say it was the truth?"
     Furiko sighed and sat down next to Hyatt's examining table.  "I 
don't know how much of what she showed you was true.  All I know is what 
I experienced.  You two know that some of the girls here worked with me 
before we opened the club.  Well, we all worked for ACROSS.  We all 
worked for Il Palazzo."  Furiko ran her hands through her hair, clearly 
upset.
     Sonoka frowned.  She'd never seen Furiko like this.  "Furiko, I 
want to hear this, but... just tell us as much as you want to."
     Furiko smiled.  "It's not always pleasant to think back on one's 
past.  I always tend to want to rewrite it, make sure I don't make the 
same mistakes.  But you and Umeno should know the truth.  Please don't 
tell anyone else about it."
     "Of course," the two women murmured in unison.
     Furiko shuddered slighly, then began to speak.
     "The world was corrupt.  All around us was the sign of human decay 
and selfishness.  In politics, in business, in society, everything was 
lacking.  So one man decided to do something about it.  He created an 
organization that would remake humanity in the correct image.  ACROSS."
     Umeno coughed.  "He sounds insane."
     "He is, in many ways.  But he has a strong personal charisma.  Very 
strong.  When you speak with him, you can't help but believe in what 
he's saying.  He was able to recruit eight of us... all women... who 
would do anything for him," Furiko continued, looking like she was 
eating something sour.