Message-Id: <3.0.3.32.19971206122223.006e1740@qlink.queensu.ca>
Date: Sat, 06 Dec 1997 12:22:23 -0500
To: 4cw6@qlink.queensu.ca
From: Chris Willmore <4cw6@qlink.queensu.ca>
Subject: [R2096] CYCLES (By Sean Gaffney)
Mime-Version: 1.0
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All feedback greatly appreciated. 
                          -CW

---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Editor's Introduction:

    I like Childra.  I think she's a neat character, and the development
that she's been receiving in Converging Series has only made her all the
more attractive.  Her romance with Ishido has brought out a whole different
aspect of her personality, and been an all-around good read, to boot.
    However, at the rate things are going, it doesn't take a genius to find
out that her love affair with Ishido will probably NOT have a happy ending.
    Sean Gaffney was one of those non-geniuses, and he was rather upset
about the whole thing. You see, he likes Happy Endings, and seemed a bit
miffed that I'd tricked him into reading a series where he'd be denied that
satisfaction.
    His solution?
    He wrote his own ending for the pair. Or rather, trio, since he was
nice enough to remember Childra's female lover, Zannen, who stayed in 2096.
    His spins on Childra, Ish and Zannen are quite different from my own,
but still very interesting, and definitely worth a look. (That Sean's quite
a good writer also helps. ^_~)
    While you read it, remember that it does NOT take place in official CS
or R2096 continuity - it's an ALTERNATE, warm-and-fuzzy-feeling conclusion
to a thorny romantic situation.
    Anyway, I've gone on for long enough. Here's the story, and I hope you
enjoy it as much as I did!

                                              -Chris Willmore

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UNOFFICIAL * UNOFFICIAL * UNOFFICIAL * UNOFFICIAL * UNOFFICIAL * UNOFFICIAL
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                                                         /
 ____      ___             _               ___          /
|    \    |   \      /\   | |   /\   /\   |   \        /   /\
|     \   |    \  . |  \  | |. /  \_/  \  |    \       \  /  \
|  __  \  |  _  \   |   | | | |         | |  _  \    /\ \/   /
| |  \  \ | | \  \ .|   | | |.|         | | | \  \  /  \ \  /
| |  /  / | |__\  | | |  \| | | |\   /| |.| |__\  |/   /\ \/
| | /  /  |       | | |\  | |.| | | |.| | |       |\  /  \
| |/  /  .|  ___  |.| |.|   |.| |.| | | | |  ___ /\ \/   /
| |\  \   | |  .| |.| |.|   |.| |.| |.| |.| |  ./ |\    /
| | \  \ .| |   | |.| |..\  |.| |.| |.| | | |  /| | \
|_|. \__\ |_|. .|_|.|_|...\/..|_|.|_|.|_|.|_|. \|_|  \
                                             /\ \    /
Written by Christopher Willmore.            /  \ \  /
           4cw6@qlink.queensu.ca           /   /  \/
Based on a story by Rumiko Takahashi and      /
Developed by C. Michael Schumacher           /   /
[Kensu: cschumac@waun.tdsnet.com]            \  /
R2096 pages: http://qlink.queensu.ca/~4cw6/   \/(Logo:Armakuni)

==========================================================================
                                   CYCLES
==========================================================================
                              by Sean Gaffney
                            <gaffney@iconn.net>
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
      Based on ideas by Ross McKenzie, Kevin Eav, RpM, Chris Willmore,
      Caroline Seawright, and Mike Loader.  Plus, there are bits that
       are very similar to Dreams, by Erin Mills.  But I came up with
                        them independently, honest.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

                     "If I had words to speak my heart
                       If only I knew where to start
                      I know you'd see much more in me
                          Than an ill-mannered man
                            Through and through
                         Or a boy unworthy of you."

                             -Andrew Sabiston,
                               in 'Napoleon'

---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Author's disclaimer:
    Attention!  The following story, though it uses characters created by
Kevin Eav and Chris Willmore, has absolutely _nothing_ to do with
Converging Series, Ranma 2096, or The Way Things Are.  It is a _completely_
_different_, _non-canonical_ continuity based off of those series.  Thus,
don't think this is what happens to Childra and Ishido, because it _isn't_.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Somewhere in Northern Japan, 1999]

     Ishido walked along the mountain path and tried to figure out
what to do next.  He wasn't having much success.
     He'd never asked himself what he would do once he'd completed
his 'mission'.  Everything was taken care of.  Muhoshin had been 
stopped (well, in a way), Ryouga and Ukyou were probably on their
honeymoon by now, Akane was close to delivery.  Admittedly, Cologne 
was still trying to get Ishido to marry that Amazon, but...
     Childra.
     He still loved her, but there was nothing he could do about it.
She was from 100 years in the future, and a different universe.  Even
if he lived until 2096, and even if there was a Childra Jansen, it
wouldn't be _his_ Childra.  It would be some other Childra, one that
hadn't gone through what they had.  The woman he loved was gone.
     He wished...he'd been more outgoing.  Like she was.  He hoped
that she understood just how much he loved her.  His declaration of
love seemed so muted in his memory.  She was so alive, and all he had
to offer was a fruitless quest from a universe that wasn't even her
own.
     Did she still think about him?  He thought about her every day,
and now that his mission was completed, the pain was getting harder
and harder to bear.  She'd probably found someone else.  A brilliant,
vivacious woman like her would have men falling all over her.  He
blushed as he realised that she'd probably have no problems with that
at all.
     Should he try to move on, find someone else, be happy?  He thought 
about happiness, and realised that any future without Childra would be 
a hollow one.
     So here he was, walking along this path, wondering if he shouldn't
just throw himself off the mountain.
     No!  Childra would never forgive him if he killed himself because
of her.  He would not let this depress him.  He only had to remember
Rat to see how that would destroy his life.  He would find himself a
future.  For her.
     But he continued walking aimlessly, as he had no idea how to go
about it.

                                 * * * * *

     Ishido sat by the fire and attempted to relax.  Whatever he decided,
he couldn't stay here.  He needed to go somewhere.  Not China, that
would be too dangerous.  Despite what everyone seemed to think, Ishido
did _not_ like danger, and would not willingly walk into it so soon
after the Nerima debacle.
     He could go back to Nerima.  He'd been asked to stay.  But there
were just too many memories.  Good ones, but mostly bad ones.  One very
bad one in particular.  He'd lost her there.
     Suddenly a flash of silvery fire flickered in his peripheral vision.
He turned to see a bright light, carrying some sort of shape along with
it.  *Danger,* his mind flashed.  He quickly moved to an attack stance 
automatically, ready to maim or kill whoever tried to stop him - 
     Stop it!  Stop thinking that way!
     But he knew he would always be a bit like that.  There would always
be a part of him that was a killing machine.  He didn't have to like it,
though.
     The light grew, and he realised with a sinking feeling that he
recognised it.  It was just like the time he'd first met Childra, with 
that business of the locket.  Ishido had thought that it had been
destroyed. But apparently someone was using it, or something like it,
to travel again.  Maybe it was that other Muhoshin, the insane one.  
Well, they were both insane, but one at least had someone to calm him 
down.  Ishido should have known that he'd never been completely destroyed 
in that last battle with Ryo Saotome.  Well, he would see to it that his 
evil wouldn't plague _this_ universe.  He quickly moved silently towards 
the clearing, hoping to catch Muhoshin by surprise -- 
     Then the figure turned, and he gasped.
     It was her.
     She looked around the clearing desperately, and then her eyes lighted
on him.  He almost cried out with joy.  She was still just as beautiful,
just as vivacious.  And best of all, she looked at him with a gaze that
was filled with just as much love as the day she left.
     Running towards each other, their lips met in a passionate kiss.
However, much to Ishido's surprise, she broke off the kiss after only a 
few seconds.  It was then that Ishido noticed a mirror in her hand.
     A very familiar mirror.
     She looked up into his eyes.  She was wearing her green contacts
again, but that didn't make her eyes any less beautiful.
     "Ishido...do you love me?"
     "Of course."
     "Do you trust me?"
     "With my life."
     "Then trust me now."  He saw a tear fall from her eye onto the mirror,
and she leaned in to kiss him again.  And with a flash, the two of them 
vanished from the clearing.

                                 * * * * *

[Tokyo, 2097]

     Zannen was awoken by a nasty beeping near her ear, which after a
moment's concentration turned out to be her pager.  She mumbled something
to the other side of the bed, and went to get the phone.
     "Tei, this had better be important."
     "The Mirror is gone."
     That woke Zannen up.  She straightened up and began to yell into the
phone.  "WHAT?!"
     "Someone broke in and stole the mirror.  I don't see how they beat
our security -- "
     "Stuff it," Zannen said.  She quickly began to turn over possibilities
in her mind.  Who could want to steal the mirror?  Well, lots of people,
but who would have the needs and the ability?  She turned to the bed.
     "Childra, could y--"
     Childra was gone.  She'd been in bed with Zannen last night - the
state of the bed left no doubt about _that_ - so where could she have 
gone?  A nasty suspicion began to surface in Zannen's mind.
     "Tei, lock everything down.  I don't care if you have to guard it
personally.  I'm testing a theory, I'll be right back."  She hung up and 
raced over to her computer.
     After a moment's search, the computer confirmed what Zannen had
already half-known; Childra was gone.  No longer in Tokyo.  Childra had 
stolen the mirror for whatever reasons, and was using it illegally.
     Zannen felt herself growing angry.  She remembered their conversation
in bed last night.  Childra had softened her up with a long bout of sex, 
and then started asking all these questions.  Zannen hadn't thought too
much about it at the time, and so had answered them without much thought.  
Including the Nanban Mirror.
     Of course her guard was down.  She hadn't expected the woman she loved
to BETRAY her.  Zannen felt her anger grow into fury.  She quickly dressed
and got out of the house, running towards EH.
     Despite her rage, she was quickly sifting through possibilities.  The
University's time machine did not have the capability or power to yank
Childra and the mirror back.  She'd have to think of something else.
     She entered the building, deserted at this time of night.  That was
good, it meant that she'd be able to deal with this without the authorities
getting involved.  This was something between her and Childra, and no one
else.
     There was one small chance.  If she watched the readings and waited
until the moment Childra used the mirror, she could redirect the Mirror's
energies and bring them here.  Not enough to stop whatever damage Childra
was doing in the past, but enough so that she couldn't get away afterwards.
     *You're already thinking of her as a criminal.  She's never done any
damage to the timestreams before.  She's your most trusted agent.* Zannen's
mind thought.
     Her anger answered for her.  *Why did she steal it?  Why the
deception?  She's doing something, and she doesn't want me to know.*
     While her mind was arguing with itself, Zannen quickly set up another
disturbance.  This would throw up a cloud of chronal particles in a disused
warehouse across town.  They'd used this before when missions had to be
carried out in secret.  However much Childra had betrayed her, Zannen was
not about to let the Kunou Foundation get their hands on her.
     That done, Zannen had nothing to do but watch the readings and try to
explain why Childra had betrayed her.
     The thought occurred to Zannen that Childra had found someone else,
that there was another woman.  She rejected it almost immediately.  She
knew Childra better than she knew herself.  There wasn't anyone else...
     Then again, Childra had seemed odd lately.  Not distant, in fact the
two of them were closer than ever.  Childra just seemed...a little less
alive.  Zannen had put it down to culture shock, but it was more than
that.  It was as if...
     As if Childra had left something behind in 1996.  Or someone.
     Now Zannen began to be a little afraid.  She continued to watch the
screen.
     Suddenly the screen showed that the Mirror was in use.  Quickly,
Zannen pulled all of the energies from whatever destination Childra had
chosen, and dumped them all here.  A form began to develop in the 
corner of the lab.  Zannen ignored it for the moment, and set up the 
diversion she had planned earlier.
     That having been completed, she turned to greet her lover.
     Who was in the arms of another man.  Kissing him passionately.
     Another MAN.
     It has been said that Zannen, being intelligent and in control of
herself, does not possess the extremes of emotion or tendencies toward
psychotic rages that are typical of Hibikis.  This is false, of course.
Zannen is just a person who likes to put her temper to good use, usually
by destroying the life of anyone who had the misfortune of raising it.
However, she is still, above all, a Hibiki, and that is why seeing
Childra with that man...no, _boy_...shoved her brain onto a single track.
     *Betrayed.  Betrayed me.  She betrayed me.  _She_ betrayed _me_.
Betrayal.*
     Childra looked up, presumably puzzled that she wasn't where she 
intended to be.  Then she looked and saw Zannen, and turned white. 
     Zannen was still in control of herself enough to realise that she
might hurt Childra if she stayed in the room, and that wasn't an option.
They'd have to talk later, she couldn't control herself.  She spun on 
her heel, and began to walk out of the room.
     She was stopped by Childra tackling her full force and wrestling
her to the ground.  Even with the advantage of surprise, it didn't take
long before Zannen threw her off and prepared to leave again.  But 
before she could do that, she looked in Childra's eyes.
     Zannen liked to think that she knew Childra better than anyone.  
Childra's eyes were mirrors to her soul, if you knew where to look.
Childra had opened up to Zannen a lot, and she was confident that
she could always tell what her lover was feeling.
     There was guilt there.  A lot of it.  And self-loathing.  And love,
still.  So much love that Zannen found she couldn't rip her eyes away.
But there was no malice.
     "Zannen, please listen to me.  Please understand why I had to do
this."
     "Why you had to betray me?" Zannen growled.
     "I didn't betray you!  Not in the way you think!"
     Zannen wanted to get away.  To go somewhere where she could think 
about what had happened clearly.  It was very difficult to think clearly
with Childra looking at her that way.
     So, eventually, she relented.  "Fine.  But not here.  You don't
seem to realise how stupid this was, Childra.  You risked your life so 
that you could bring back that boy.  I don't want to further risk it by 
staying.  We can go to the house."
     Childra seemed to look around and notice where they were again.
"Fine, let's go."
     Zannen turned to look at the boy.  He was still standing in the 
middle of the room, looking around in confusion.  Then his eyes locked 
with hers.  She gave him a glare of pure hatred.  Much to her surprise, 
he didn't quail under it, but met it with an equally intense gaze.  
This was bad, thought Zannen.  He's dangerous.
     She turned back to Childra.  "He does not come with us.  I don't
care where he goes, but I am talking with you alone."
     Childra stopped at the entrance.  She seemed to gather her resolve.
"I'll talk with you alone, but he's coming with us.  Zannen, Ishido's 
from 1999.  He wasn't that good at interpersonal skills when I first met 
him," and here she smiled apologetically, which infuriated Zannen, "and
he'd be totally lost here.  I didn't go back and get him just to abandon
him."
     Childra's words pierced Zannen's heart.  She had never heard Childra
speak that way about anyone, much less a MALE.  The thought galled her.  
She didn't accede verbally, but instead just spun on her heel and stalked 
out, giving careful attention to which cameras were on so that she could 
come back and disable them later.
     Her head was still screaming at her.  *Betrayal.*

                                 * * * * *

     Ishido walked through the streets heading towards what he assumed 
was a safe place, probably Childra's house or dorm.  Normally, he would be 
taking the time to get used to his surroundings, especially since it 
seemed Childra had managed to bring him back to her own time.  But with 
this new woman around, he wasn't taking his eyes off of Childra.
     He was still having difficulty guessing what kind of a threat this
woman posed.  She seemed full of anger.  In fact, he'd be willing to bet
that there was a lot of Ryouga's ancestry in her.  She set off all of
his danger senses.  The only thing keeping him from attacking was the
fact that none of that rage seemed directed at Childra.  He could take 
her despising him, God knows enough people had done that.  But if any
of that rage was aimed towards Childra...she would be stopped.
     Childra seemed very odd as well.  She had always been very secure
and confident around him, at times overwhelming him with the sheer force
of her personality.  But around this other woman, she seemed very shy and 
apologetic, always letting her take the lead.  Was this what Childra was 
really like, and her confidence in 1996 was just an act?  He remembered 
when they had first made love, how different she looked, how vulnerable.  
Likewise when he found her in the graveyard, she had let down all her 
defences when she kissed him.
     He realised now that she acted the same way around this other woman.  
Childra trusted her enough that she could afford to let down all her 
defences, to admit that she was not as strong as she pretended to be.  
She had once admitted the same thing to him.
     Looking at the two of them, and especially the way that Childra was
acting, it occurred to him that they loved each other deeply.  You could 
see it in everything they did.
     So why was he here?  Why did she bring him here?
     Ishido glanced at the other woman, and his looks darkened once again.

                                 * * * * *

     Zannen turned on the light to her bedroom and lay down, facing away
from Childra.  She couldn't look at her now, she needed to stay angry.
If she looked at Childra, and saw the love in her eyes, she'd lose that
rage, and that other man would win.  She couldn't have that.  So she
carefully looked at the wall, keeping Childra to her back.
     They'd arrived at the house, and Childra had gotten the boy some
food and drink.  Zannen was appalled that Childra would abuse her 
hospitality like that.  She'd quickly left the room.  She could hear
quiet talking coming from the kitchen, and then steps as Childra headed
for the bedroom.
     For a while there was no sound at all except for Zannen's heavy
breathing.  But finally Zannen decided that she couldn't take any more of
this, that she needed to know why Childra had done this.  She turned to
face towards Childra, but still looked away, showing Childra that she 
could start attempting to explain.
     "Zannen...there are so many things I have to apologize for."
     Zannen just gazed at the wall evenly.  She wouldn't speak until
Childra had finished.
     "Not for Ishido.  If I had to do it all over again, I'd still have
gone back for him.  But for what I did to you.  You say that I betrayed
you, and maybe that's true, but not in the way you mean."
     Childra began to pace up and down the room, talking faster and
faster.
     "When I first met Ishido, I didn't recognise what I was feeling,
because I hadn't experienced it all that much.  Only with you.  I had
no idea how to act in this situation.  What if I drove him away?  I
didn't know what to do."
     "That's when I turned to you.  You've always been my rock, Zannen.
The one who I can always depend on to be there for me.  The strong one,
when my strength has finally given out.  I tried to do that for him.
I tried to be like you."
     Childra finally gave up on pacing and sat down on the bed, facing
the opposite wall from Zannen.
     "I've no idea why I did it.  I treasure our relationship, Zannen,
and I would rather die than hurt you.  But I did, almost without
realising it.  I put my trust in someone else.  That is what I am 
apologising for.  I can never be sorry enough.  And I can never expect
your forgiveness."
     Zannen couldn't take it any more, and finally spoke up.  "Then why
are you telling me this, if you don't expect me to forgive you?"
     Childra turned to look at Zannen for the first time, and there 
were tears running down her cheeks.  "I don't know what I'd do without
you."
     Zannen managed to feel even angrier, if that was possible.  "What
about your new...love?"  She spat out the last word.
     "It wouldn't be enough."  Zannen stiffened as she felt Childra's
hands wrap around her body.  "I still need you, need you so badly." She
moved her lips across Zannen's neck.  "I thought it would be enough to 
be with you, but it wasn't, I felt incomplete."  Now she turned towards
Childra, looking directly into her eyes while stroking her hair.  "And 
it would be the same if I were only with him, because I feel just as 
incomplete without you.  I missed you every moment that I was in the 
past, even if I didn't realise it at the time."  Here she turned away,
unable to look at the anger that had risen again in Zannen's eyes.  "I 
can't do without either of you."
     Zannen was finding it impossible to concentrate.  She was trying 
to hold onto her rage, but her body was rebelling against her.  And,
loathe though she was to admit it, her heart was as well.
     She giggled through her tears.  "I sound like the Kunou I met in 
that time.  Maybe it's a cliche, but...I have a lot of love in my heart,
Zannen.  More than enough for both of you.  Please understand one thing,
if nothing else.  I still love you just as much as I ever have.  With
all my heart and all my soul."
     Neither of them spoke for at least five minutes.  Zannen tried to
gauge everything Childra had said, desperately trying to find dome sort
of deceit in her tone.  It broke her heart to try to do this, but the
alternative was that she was telling the truth, and Zannen didn't think 
she could live with that.
     Finally, Zannen spoke.  "Was he your first?"
     Childra looked up, startled.  "What?"
     Zannen's eyes narrowed.  "Was he the first man you made love to?"
     Childra bowed her head, and Zannen could tell what the answer was.
     "So, any sort of relationship we've had in the past has also been
based on lies."
     "I thought you would reject me."
     This startled Zannen.  "What?"
     "I didn't know how you'd react if you found out I was sleeping 
with other men.  I thought...I thought that you would leave me.  I
couldn't take that chance.  So I didn't tell you, though it hurt not 
to."
     "It hurts more to find out now.  Is there anything else about you
that I don't know?  Any other deep, dark secrets?"
     Childra thought about that for a moment.  "Some.  But none that
would hurt you.  No more secrets that would endanger what we have."
     *What _do_ we have?* Zannen thought.  There was one more question
she had to ask.  "If you were back in 1996, at the point where you met
him, and you could prevent it...would you still fall in love with him?"
     Childra was once again silent for a moment.  "Yes.  I don't regret
for one moment what I found with Ishido."
     So that was it.  Zannen could tell Childra was serious.  She loved
both of them.  Which begged the question of what was to be done about 
it.
     Zannen turned back to the wall.  "Leave me a while.  I need to be 
alone."
     "Of course," she heard Childra say, and there were steps moving
back towards the kitchen.
     Zannen, alone with her thoughts, tried to summon up the anger that
she had felt before, but she couldn't do it.  She couldn't deny Childra
her happiness, not even with all of the deception that had happened.
She would do anything to see Childra happy.
     She would also do anything to avoid Childra becoming miserable.
This Ishido was an unknown card.  She thought of him, and smiled grimly 
as her anger came back full force.  They would need to talk.  Without 
Childra there.  And see what was to be done.

                                 * * * * *

     Ishido sat at the kitchen table staring into space.  He hadn't
eaten any of the food Childra had given him, simply because he sensed 
that this was the other woman's house and that his presence was 
decidedly unwelcome.  So he stared at the walls and tried to decide 
what he was going to do next.
     He heard footsteps after about fifteen minutes, but they paused 
before reaching the room.  Finally, Childra entered.  But this wasn't
the Childra that he had seen with Zannen, the passive girl who seemed
almost afraid.  This was the Childra he had first met in the past, 
larger than life and almost overwhelming.  She quickly gathered Ishido
up in her arms and gave him a torridly passionate kiss.  Not the 
hurried kiss they had had in the field back in the past.  This kiss
oozed sexuality and eroticism.
     She began to stroke his face, then moved her lips down to his 
neck.  She quickly moved the chair aside and sat in his lap, still 
kissing him all over.  She started to stroke his chest, murmuring
quiet noises.
     She whispered fiercely into his ear.  "Did you miss me as much as 
I missed you?"
     Ishido was starting to sweat.  It occurred to him that Childra
was going to attempt to seduce him right here and now, despite the
fact that that other woman was only a room away.  With incredible
difficulty, he pushed her away from him.
     Childra looked offended.  "What's the matter?"
     Ishido attempted to reign in his raging desires.  He had missed
Childra with a fierce desperation.  He wanted nothing more than to just
take her in his arms and make love to her for the rest of the evening.
But he needed to know what she really felt, why she had brought him
here.  "Childra, why am I here?"
     That question brought her up short.  Her eyes came back into focus,
and Ishido realised that she had been running on autopilot, not really 
thinking about where she was.  Now she looked at him with genuine love,
instead of just sexuality.  This made it even more difficult for him to
make his point.
     "What do you mean?" she asked.
     "You love that other woman," he shot back.
     "Of course," Childra responded.  Ishido started; this wasn't what 
he had expected to hear.  "Why can't I love both of you?"  She tried
once again to move to kiss him, but Ishido pushed her away again.  This
time, her face definitely looked hurt.
     "You can't love both of us the same way," Ishido insisted.
     "Why not?"
     "Childra, I've spent the past three years in Nerima watching the
rivalries there.  There were so many people who loved so many other
people.  And yet, in the end, almost everyone there ended up hurt.  
They couldn't get the one they loved, because those two loved each 
other.  If Ryouga and Akane's situation taught me anything, it's that
this sort of situation can't be dragged out.  You can't just go on
as if we both mean the same to you.  You have to make a choice."
     There was a long silence.  Finally, Childra turned towards him,
and her face was very serious.  "I did.  I chose both of you."
     "Childra -- "
     "No, Ishido, listen to me.  I am not some teenager who doesn't
now how to deal with people.  I'm thirty-six years old, and have more
experience in matters of the heart than any of those clowns back in
the twentieth century.  So you listen to me, and listen good."
     That might have been difficult, as Ishido was still having 
trouble grasping what Childra had said.  Thirty-six?  _Thirty-six_
years _old_?  Good Lord, that meant that she'd been over twice his
age when they first made love!  He knew she was a few years older,
but..._thirty-six_?
     Childra continued.  "What they had wasn't love.  It was obsession, 
or puppy love, or misplaced gratitude, but not real love.  I know what 
real love is, and it's rare.  Most people only get to experience it 
once in a lifetime.  I'm one of the luckiest people I know, because I 
got to experience it twice.  Once when I first met Zannen, and once 
with you.  Love isn't about sex, or friendship, or even happiness.  
Love is when you look at the person you're with and feel complete."
     Ishido thought about that.  Maybe she was right.  Hell, she 
certainly did have more experience than him:  more than fifteen years'
worth.  Who was he to lecture her about love?
     Something still didn't sit right with him, and he decided that it
was the other woman, Zannen.  He didn't trust her, let alone like her, 
but Childra was asking the two of them to be her equal partners?  He 
couldn't just agree to it, no matter what he thought of Childra.  He 
would have to talk to Zannen first, and make sure that a few facts 
were laid out.
     Unfortunately, it was very difficult to think about things like
this when Childra was blowing in his ear.  He gently disengaged himself
from her and smiled weakly.
     "Could I have some time to myself?  This has been a bit of a
surprising day for me, and I need to think about how to deal with it."
     Childra sighed sadly.  "Zannen said that too.  All right, Lobis.
I'll be right out on the porch if you need me."  She turned and began
to walk out, then stopped and faced him again.
     "This was one of the hardest decisions I've ever made in my life...
and the easiest.  I thought that once it was made, everything would
work out."
     Ishido looked into her eyes.  "Sounds like you need some time to 
yourself to think as well."
     She nodded and went out to the porch, pulling the door shut behind
her.

                                 * * * * *

     Zannen lay on the bed, attempting to figure out what to do now.
Could she even forgive Childra?  She'd thought that their relationship
had been honest and open...well, all right, she hadn't, but this wasn't
just a past lover or something.  This was years of betrayal, of deceit,
of...
     She paused, and sniffed the air.
     That scent; the aroma of musky arousal in the air.
     Childra was rutting again.
     *Oh, god, _no_!*
     She quickly rose from her bed, unconsciously slipping into a 
defensive position.  She had to stop them.  The thought of Childra having
sex in her kitchen was bad enough, but with that...that _child_.
     No problems there; he was alone in the kitchen.
     Zannen quickly saw her opportunity.  She had distrusted this boy
from the beginning, and now he was taking liberties with Childra.  The
first thing to do was separate them, probably by force.  Luckily,
Childra was out of the room, so she could be as brutal as she wanted.
However, before she could move from the hallway, he spoke out loud.
     "She went out onto the porch.  I told her I needed to think, and
she took the time to do some of her own.  But I get the feeling I've
done enough thinking.  If I'm going to stay with Childra in any sort of
way, I need to know about you and what sort of threat you pose to her.  
I suspect you're thinking the same thing about me."
Zannen glided over to the other side of the room.  She couldn't
afford to let him anger her; she needed to keep her cool and spot his 
weak points.  So that destroying him would be that much sweeter.  "You
think I'm posing a threat to her?  I've been her lover far longer than
you have.  Moreover, I'm a far better match."
     Ishido smiled wryly.  "You can guess that after just meeting me?"
     Zannen's eyes flared.  "I know boys just like you.  Young turks
who let their hormones rule their brain.  How old are you anyway?"  She
was amused to see Ishido flush at that question.
     "Nineteen."
     There was a small gasp from the porch.  Both Ishido and Zannen 
noticed it but did not acknowledge it.
     "You were seventeen years younger than her when it happened?"
     He flushed a little more.  "Actually, twenty years younger.  This 
was three years ago."
     Zannen paused.  For a moment, her job training came to the fore,
as she wondered why the mirror had taken Childra back to 1999 instead
of 1996, but then she remembered her anger.  Unfortunately, it was long
enough for the boy to get himself together.
     Ishido smiled.  "Let's take this point by point.  You despise me.  
Fine, I'm not wild about you either.  You're lucky that you're seeing 
me now, rather than three years ago.  I have enough control of my 
programming to stop myself from attacking _everyone_ I see as a threat."
     Zannen was amused despite herself.  "And why aren't you attacking
me?"
     "Because almost all of your hatred is directed at me, and none of
it at Childra.  Make no mistake about it, if I ever see you as a threat
to her, I _will_ attack you."
     Zannen's amusement was replaced one again by her anger.  "And who 
gave you the job of being her protector?  I've been Childra's lover for 
years now, and if anyone's going to protect her against...against 
_children_ like _you_, it's going to be me."
     Ishido sighed.  "Would you stop calling me a child?  Let's both 
agree that we would never do anything to harm Childra, and that anyone 
who did would have to face both of us.  Agreed?"
     Zannen nodded warily.  She was still uncomfortable with the idea of
anyone else getting this close to Childra.  Nevertheless, if he _had_
gotten this close to Childra, there would need to be some serious
adjustments.  She was beginning to realise that she might have to...
compromise.  The thought appalled her.  She looked at his face, still
set in that same impassive mask.  "You seem to be accepting this very 
well."
     He shrugged.  "I love Childra and want to be with her.  
Unfortunately, it seems that that means including you into the picture.
I'm trying to establish some ground rules so that we don't end up 
killing each other.  Because if either of us were to die, I suspect it
would destroy Childra."
     Zannen nodded reluctantly.
     Ishido went on.  "Let's see if we can establish some ground rules."
     Zannen glared.  "What, is this where we divide the week up 
mathematically?"
     "No, this is where we decide how to make Childra happy.  That is 
what you want, isn't it?"
     God, she hated him.  A lot.  "Yes."
     "Fine.  First rule is that Childra spends her time with us however
she wants.  If she spends a whole week with one of us, that isn't going
to be a problem.  Childra's relationship with you seems very strong, and
I don't want mistrust ruining it."
     Zannen raised a finger.  "One thing.  There is one exception to this
rule.  No matter how much she wants it, _we_ will..."
     Ishido visibly shook.  "No, you're right.  We will not.  No offence,
you're very pretty."
     "I know," Zannen grinned.  "And no offence, but you are not."
     Ishido smirked.  "Second, if we do end up fighting with each other, 
which is going to happen, we'll do it privately."
     "Why," Zannen asked.  "Childra isn't stupid, she'll know that we're
not getting along."
     "I know," Ishido shot back.  "However, you said it.  Childra's not
stupid.  If we fight, she might attempt to defuse it...in her way.  And 
there are times when we'll need to fight."
     Zannen imagined getting in an argument and then having Childra 
attempt to seduce her in order to break out of it.  She nodded.  "You're
right."
     It was her turn now.  "Third, you are living elsewhere."
     Ishido nodded.  "I'll see where I can go this evening..."
     Zannen waved her hand.  "This evening is fine.  Childra offered you
my hospitality, even though I would not have done the same.  We decided
a while back that my house was hers.  Admittedly, that was before the
ghosts, time-travelers, and psychotic murderers started staying the
night.  Besides, I'll be out for a while.  I still need to think about
what this has done to our relationships.  There are a lot of problems
that aren't caused by you.  I need to sort those out myself."
     "Childra has a sizeable trust fund.  I'm sure that she can arrange 
for a place for you to live.  Work, that's up to you.  Try to acclimatize
yourself quickly.  You've got a century to catch up on."  She had tried
speaking in her official voice, ignoring the fact that the man who had 
stolen her lover was in front of her.  It didn't seem to be working.
     "Try to get a place that's close enough to this one so I can
contact Childra in an emergency, but far enough away do that we don't
see each other every day...."
     The conversation died out.  She couldn't cope with this, not now.
She was looking at his calm face and getting more and more enraged.  She
had to leave or she might try to attack him.  And the one thing that was
very clear to her was that if it came to physical blows between them, she
would lose.
     Well, there were other ways to gain the upper hand.  He may have
the fighting edge, but no one could beat her devious mind.
     She quickly stood up.  "I'm going for a walk, probably until 
morning.  I'll leave you to tell Childra.  It had better be exactly what 
we discussed."
     He glared.  "Fine, don't trust me."
     "I won't."  And she spun on her heel, heading for the front door.
Her head was already spinning with thoughts of revenge.  Plots grew form,
ideas rolled into place.  She began to chuckle evilly.

                                 * * * * *

     Childra closed the screen door silently.  She'd heard enough; they
didn't like each other, but they weren't going to kill each other.  That
would do for now.
     Her mind was still reeling from what she had overheard in their
conversation.  He was _nineteen_?!?!  And it had been three years for 
him, that meant he had been sixteen when they first made love.  And 
she'd been thirty-five.  Talk about robbing the cradle...she shivered,
though she wasn't sure whether it was with disgust or desire.
     She grinned when she thought of their 'rules'.  A threesome, huh?
Those two have more imagination than I do.  Still, there were reasons
why she agreed with what they were saying.  She didn't want the two of
them to be too close.  She wanted her relationships with them to be
different.
     She loved them equally, that was certain.  But it didn't mean that 
she loved them the same way.  Both Zannen and Ishido controlled the way
that she acted, though she didn't think they realised it yet.
     Ishido let her be the strong one, the loving, wisecracking girl
with a heart of gold and a mind like a steel trap.  Being around Lobis
let her feel that she could accomplish anything.  That had been a major
reason why she had decided to risk going back to get him.  She felt that
she had left her strength behind with him.
     Perhaps it stayed with him.  This was a very different Ishido from
the one she'd met in 1996.  More mature, observant...this was her Lobis
all grown up.  Yet she still gathered strength from him.  Only this time 
she felt his strength as well, and the two combined helped to make her 
feel even stronger.
     Then there was Zannen, with whom she could bare her soul.  Zannen
knew how weak Childra really was, and didn't seem to mind.  She could
drop her guard, and not have to worry about anyone taking advantage of 
that.  Zannen soothed her.  Zannen was her rock.
     Sometimes she felt weak anyway.  Weak for needing both of them.  
She knew that if she had left Ishido in the twentieth century, he would 
have gotten her and started his life anew.  Likewise, if she'd remained 
with him in 1996, Zannen would have found the strength to carry on.  Why
was she different?  Why did she need them so much?
     Childra suspected she knew the answer.  They defined her.  She no
longer knew who Childra Jansen was, she had long since lost the ability
to find it in herself.  That was her weakness, the fact that her own 
self was created by other people.  By the person Zannen saw, and wanted 
to take care of.  By the person Ishido saw, and felt in awe of.  Neither 
of them her, but both of them enough of her that it didn't matter.
     The door opened behind her, and Ishido stepped out.  He wrapped his
arms around her neck, and Childra sighed happily; he had made his choice.
     "Zannen's gone for a walk; she said she won't be back until morning,"
he whispered in her ear.
     She nodded.  "It'll take her a while to forgive me.  I kept so many
things from her.  Mostly out of fear, but also...I think I kept some
things from her to show that I wasn't devoted to her.  To try and have
my own life."
     "And you don't feel devoted any more?" he asked.
     "Oh, no, I'm more devoted to her than ever.  But I don't feel guilty
about it anymore.  It's not as bad as I thought it would be.  I hope she
can forgive me."
     He smiled.  "No need to worry there."  He turned serious for a moment.
"Childra...Zannen and I have agreed to a few things.  You heard what they
were."
     She turned in his grip.  "You knew I was listening?"
     He laughed.  "We both did.  In any case, I hope that you can 
understand why we set those rules for ourselves.  It was to make you happy.
We may despise each other, but we would both do anything for you."
     Childra smiled, and began to stroke his chest.  "As long as you 
understand I'll be trying to make you happy, too."
     Ishido opened his mouth, but she laid a finger across it.  "No
threesomes, I promise."
     He frowned at her, but closed his mouth again.  The intervening years
had only made him more handsome; Childra couldn't take it anymore.  "You
know," she whispered erotically into his ear, "it's been a hundred years
since we last made love."
     Ishido began to get nervous.  Good, she'd hate to think that he'd
changed too much.  She began to drag him back into the house, feeling
happier than she had in months.  Life was good.

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                           "Every word you impart
                            Is as soft as a kiss
                         It's absurd, but my heart
                         Never once felt like this.
                          Was it fate that we met?
                        From that first night I knew
                            That I want to share
                            The rest of my life
                                 With you."

                             -Andrew Sabiston,
                               in 'Napoleon'

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