Deirdre has three mommies
An Amber Story for Children (or maybe not)

By John Biles

	
	Samantha took out a handkerchief and wiped the sweat from her brow.  It was 
unseasonably warm for spring; Dworkinland stayed open year round because it never got 
too cold where it was was, but usually it never got too hugely hot either.  But today, it 
was blazing hot.  Or at least it felt blazing hot if you had massive amounts of permed 
black hair and were wearing full body armor and toting a huge axe around.  Samantha 
was one of Dworkinland's character actors, to be precise, she had the job of being 
Deirdre, Princess of Amber.  

	It paid well, but she got stuck wearing heavy armor most of the year, which 
sometimes drove her nuts.  That and having to fall into the 'Abyss' with that idiot David 
every night.  If he 'accidentally' fondled her again, she was going to test her axe on his 
neck.  It was a pity the previous Brand, Thomas O'Connel, had gotten accidentally shot 
by Sandy (aka Darako) last year, then got eaten by the feral Brands the last manager had 
kept in the 'Abyss' for 'authenticity'.  His screams had been pretty authentic when they'd 
chucked him in after Thomas.  Poor Thomas.  

	Samantha decided that even though it would break character, she was going to 
have to have some ice cream or she was just going to die.  She ambled over to Main 
Street Shadow Earth, since it had the best ice cream shops in Dworkinland.  Striding into 
one of them, she began arguing with herself whether she wanted Abyssal Chocolate, 
Chaosian Tutti-Frutti, or some Lime Sherbert.  As she stood at the counter arguing with 
herself, a small kid came in and started looking under all of the tables; the child had her 
orange hair pulled back into a braid, and slightly pointed ears poked up out of them.  She 
was wearing a large paper red bishop's hat, a loose green blouse, and blue jeans.  

	I'd better make sure she's okay, Samantha thought.  She's kind of young to be 
running around loose.  She came over to the young girl.  "Hi, what's your name?  Are you 
lost?"

	"I'm not lost.  My parents are lost," the girl said.  "I'm Deirdre.  What's your 
name?"

	"I'm Deirdre, Princess of Amber," Samantha said.  "Would you like me to help 
you find them?"

	The little girl blinked.  "I thought I was Deirdre, Princess of Amber."

	"Well, we can share, right?" Samantha asked gently.

	Deirdre said, "Okay!"  She straightened up.  "I think Mommy would be buying ice 
cream and putting it down Daddy's shirt if she was here anyway."

	Samantha laughed.  "Does she do that often?"  She thought for a moment.  
"Would you like some ice cream?"

	"Okay!" Deirdre said.  "I want some Abyss Chocolate and Begman Strawberry."

	Samantha went over and ordered herself some Abyss Chocolate and Avalon 
Vanilla, and an Abyss Chocolate/Begman Strawberry for Deirdre.  Then they headed out 
into the street.  As Deirdre munched on her ice cream, Samantha asked her, "So what 
does your Daddy look like?"

	"Whatever he wants to," Deirdre said.

	"How do you recognize him if he could be anything?" Samantha asked.  
Shapeshifter, she thought.  This could complicate things.

	"Well, he wears his wedding ring on one hand and his magic ring on the other," 
Deirdre said.  "And I guess he usually is kinda the same."

	"And how would that be?" Samantha asked as they headed up the street.  Dozens 
of tourists streamed past them, heading into various shops full of tacky souvenirs.

	"He's got dark hair, and he's really big like you, and he's kinda darker skinned 
than me."  Deirdre herself was fairly tanned in complexion.  "And he's wearing the ugly 
hat today."

	"The ugly hat?"

	"Grandpa Ramon gave it to him.  It's called a...a..."  Her face screwed up as her 
brain tried to remember the word.  "Fiddle."

	"Fedora?" Samantha asked.

	"Yeah," Deirdre said.  "Mommy made him not wear his robes today, so he's 
wearing stuff like me.  Except his shirt is red.  And he has a noose around his neck."

	"..."   Not more of those lunatic Odin cultists, Samantha thought.  "Does he 
worship Odin?"

	"Is that the funny looking man with one eye?"

	Samantha laughed.  "Yes."  She started working on her own ice cream.

	"Daddy is a priest of the Serpent.  He used to be stylin', but now he sets things on 
fire instead."

	Samantha took another bite of her ice cream and cocked her head in a fit of 
paranoia to listen for the distant wail of fire alarms, but she couldn't hear any.  "Sets 
things on fire?"

	"And writes books.  And spanks Miroku when he's bad."

	"Is Miroku your brother?"

	"He's very naughty," Deirdre said.  "He isn't sweet and innocent and made out of 
sugar like me."  She licked her ice cream, then said, "It's his birthday too, but he and 
Akari got in a fight about whose daddy was better, so they didn't get to come."

	Samantha craned her head about, looking for any men wearing a noose and a 
fedora.  "So you and Miroku were both born on the Spring Equinox?"

	"No, we were born in a big bed in the Embassy."  Deirdre finished off her 
chocolate and started on her strawberry ice cream.  "Akari was born a month earlier on 
the bed, but Miroku didn't wanna come out, Daddy says."

	Samantha blinked.  "They're twins, but one was born a month earlier?"

	"I guess Miroku liked being inside Mitsune-mommy."

	Samantha decided not to think about that too much.  "So your mommy had three 
of you at once?"

	"No, no, me and Miroku have the same daddy, but different mommies.  He and 
Akari have the same mommy, but different daddies."

	Chaosians are all insane, Samantha thought.  "So what's your Daddy's name?"

	"Daddy is named Davros, except when he's Narya or when he's Special Agent 
Cooper or a wolf or a falcon or...."

	Samantha asked, "And your Mommy is?"

	She looked Deirdre up and down.  "Am I supposed to tell you her real name or 
her other name?"

	"What do you call her?"

	"Isillome."

	"Well, that'll do, won't it?"

	"I think you're supposed to call her Moonshade, though," Deirdre said.  "But I 
can't ever understand who calls her what."

	"Does she shapeshift too?"

	"My two other mommies both shapeshift, but she doesn't.  She can't spell very 
well either."  Deirdre finished off her ice cream, then began licking her fingers.

	They now had wandered into the Race Track area.  Mr. Toad's Hellride stood 
open to their left with a long line, and off to the right, lots of teenagers were driving 
round crazily on Stagger Lee's Go-Kart Track, crashing cars into each other.  Up ahead 
was a small forested area full of treaded trails; a tank stood near the gate with an 
attendant looking bored.  A sign proclaimed 'EvilMike's Tank Ride'.  

	Deirdre clapped her hands.  "Oooh, I wanna take a tank ride!"

	What the hell, Samantha thought.  It couldn't hurt.  "Okay."

	They went over to the tank, which meowed hello to them.  Samantha patted it.  
"Good kitty."  All of the ride's tanks had odd quirks.  One of them had the ghost of Jeb 
Stuart in it.  Another one only went backwards.  And this one was possessed by a cat 
spirit.  "Hey, Ritsuko, I'm using my park credit for this, okay?"

	"Okay," Ritsuko said.  "Hop in."  She clambered up on top, then Samantha hefted 
Deirdre up to her.  "What's your name?" Ritsuko asked Deirdre.  

	"I'm Deirdre, Princess of Amber and Cardinal of Catalonia!"  She patted her hat.

	"Did you eat at Burger Pope today?" Ritsuko asked.

	"Yep!"

	Samantha scrambled up after her, and sat on top of the tank, holding Deirdre in 
her lap as the tank started along with Ritsuko standing half in and half out.  "Take it 
gentle, Mike," she said to the tank.

	"Meow!"

	"Lost kid?" Ritsuko asked.

	"I'm not lost.  I know where I am," Deirdre said.  "Mommy and Daddy are lost."

	"So how did they get lost?"

	"Mole People."

	"..."

	Samantha asked weakly, "Mole People?"

	The tank rumbled down a well beaten track.  Birds sang in the trees nearby.

	"Uncle Morgy says that if you don't know what to say, you should always guess 
either Mole People or Mecha-Pope and you can't go wrong."

	Ritsuko laughed.  "Left here, Mike."

	The tank swung left, and several branches battered at Samantha's armor.  She 
asked Deirdre, "What were you doing when they got lost?"

	"We were in a  bookstore, and I went to go get a book, but I couldn't find it, and 
then they got lost.  I know Mommy was talking about going to Queen Cait's Funland For 
Grownups earlier, but Daddy said they couldn't go there because I wasn't grown up, and 
I'm wondering if they decided to go without me."

	Samantha frowned.  She'd seen parents cheesy enough to do something like that; 
especially parents who seemed to all be shapeshifting and making each other pregnant.  
"Hey, Rits, this tank can drive outside the ride, right?"

	"Oh no, we are NOT doing that again," Ritsuko said.  "I nearly got fired the last 
time."

	"I'm not talking about going after 'Super Dave'."

	"I might be willing to take my chances if we were, but no.  You wanna scare some 
sense in her parents, then you're gonna have to do it without me and Mike."  

	Mike meowed loudly and turned off down another trail.

	"No!  Bad Mike!  Bad Mike!"  Ritsuko groaned.  "There goes my seniority."

	Samantha said, "Don't worry, Deirdre, we'll find your parents if we have to level 
Queen Cait's Funland For Grownups to do it."

	"Daddy might set Mike on fire if he gets mad," Deirdre said, worried.

	"Mike's been toughened up ever since the night the flesh-eating Beatles rioted.  
He's got a nice coating of Reflectium; magic bounces right off," Ritsuko said.  "Of 
course, we wouldn't have to test it if Mike would be a good boy and not go launch an 
attack on Queen Cait's Funland!"

	Mike purred.

	"That's IF!  Not me telling you you're being a good boy right now!"

	They crashed through some trees, then roared down the streets of the Courts of 
Chaos, past Professor Gopher-Beetle's Hall of Knowledge and the Library of Pymander 
Book Store.  Deirdre pointed at it.  "We were in there when they got lost."

	Mike was speeding up.  Samantha said, "Hey, Mike, can you stop so we can 
check the bookstore?"

	Mike sped up more.

	Ritsuko's pony tail began whipping about, smacking Deirdre in the face.  "Bad 
hair!" Deirdre shouted.  "Be good, hair, be good!"

	Mike roared around a corner; Deirdre clung desperately to Samantha to avoid 
flying off.  "Aaaahhhh!!!!"

	"Mike, slow down!" Ritsuko shouted.

	They could see the gates for Queen Cait's Funland For Grownups (You Must Be 
Over 18 To Enter).   The entrance gate had a sign which read, 'Cait's Funland is not 
reccomended for the elderly, pregnant, faithfully married, those with heart trouble, back 
problems, or Dante.'  There were two black-clad men at the gates checking IDs.  They 
looked up at the tank and leaped out of the way.

	The Tank roared past Bumpy's Casino, then began whipping its 'head' about, 
'sniffing the air'.

	"Down, Mike, down!" Ritsuko shouted.

	Then Mike spotted 'Yuki's Cabaret', which had a sign which showed a line of 
dancing mice in chorus girl outfits.  He meowed loudly and charged.

	Okay, maybe this was a bad idea, Samantha thought as the tank shells began to 
blow the front door of the cabaret open.  Thankfully, it didn't actually open until dark, so 
only a handful of cleaning staff were inside as they crashed through the front wall.  

	Very faintly, they heard someone a ways back on the street shouting, "Deirdre!  
There you are!"

	As Mike rumbled about, stomping the Cabaret flat, Samantha asked, "Is that your 
mother's voice?" to Deirdre.

	"Mommy!  I'm over here!" Deirdre shouted.

	Samantha looked and saw a huge woman with long pink hair, wearing a white 
blouse and blue jeans, a large sword on her back, running down the street towards them, 
along with a frantic looking dusky man who she was relieved to see was wearing a red 
tie, not a noose.  He had one hand clapped to his head to keep his fedora on.  "Are those 
your parents?"

	"Uh huh."

	"Bad tank!  You won't get any catnip if you don't stop!" Ritsuko shouted.

	It was then that Mike turned and spotted Cait's Cathouse across the street, 
complete with many pictures of cat-girls on the front wall.  Mike gave a yowl of triumph.

	"BAD TANK!"

	Black tendrils erupted out of the fedora wearing man, who turned into a falcon 
and picked up the woman with the tendrils, throwing her up on top of the tank as it 
charged across the street.  She landed on top of the tank and scooped up Deirdre into her 
arms.  "Mommy!  Where'd you go?"

	"Where did YOU go, honey?  I told you to stay with the Children's books until I 
got out of the bathroom!"

	"Oh.  I forgot," Deirdre said.

	Explosive rounds blew out the front of the Cathouse, and Mike plunged in, 
meowing wildly.  Groggy ladies of the evening began running in all directions, having 
been woken from their catnaps.  "Why do you have my daughter on top of a berserk 
tank?" the woman demanded of Samantha.

	"Because I didn't feel like risking trying to jump off a berserk tanks!" Samantha 
shouted back.  "You need to take better care of your kid!"

	Logrus tendrils wrapped around the tank, lifting it off the ground and out of the 
now collapsing Cathouse.  Mike spun his treads helplessly, and the falcon said, "Do I 
even want to know what's going on?"

	"Hi, daddy!  This is Deirdre.  She's sharing my name," Deirdre said.  "And the 
tank is Mike.  And the other lady is Ritsuko."

	"I am Davros, Deirdre's father," the falcon said.  "Deirdre, you really shouldn't 
wander off like you did."

	"I didn't get lost!  You did!" she said stubbornly.

	"We'll sort it out later.  So where do I need to deposit the tank?" Davros asked.

	"Back to the Tank Ride, please," Ritsuko said.  "Assuming Mike isn't going to get 
any more crazy ideas in his head."

	Mike meowed mournfully.

	Soon, Mike was back in his pen, Samantha and Ritsuko were off the tank, and 
Moonshade had a firm grip on Deirdre so she couldn't get lost again.  "I'm sorry about all 
that, sir.  She asked to go on the tank ride, and then Mike sort of got some wrong ideas in 
his head and..."

	Davros sighed.  "I should have put her on a  leash again."

	"I don't need a leash!  I'm not the one who got lost!"  Deirdre insisted.

	"But I'm grateful for you taking care of her."

	"Just doing my job, sir," Samantha said.  "I end up helping lost kids just about 
every day."

	"Well, I'm grateful.  Although really, little kids shouldn't be taken on tank rides."

	"She begged," Samantha said weakly.

	"I made her do it!" Deirdre announced.  "And it's probably all Miroku's fault, 
anyway."

	Davros winced at that.  "Don't blame everything on your brother."

	"Akari does."

	"Are you Akari?"

	"One day, I'll learn how to turn into Akari, and then I will be!" Deirdre said.

	"Not if I can help it," Moonshade muttered.  

	"Mommy?" Deirdre asked.

	"Yes?"

	"Which of your names should I have told Deirdre is your name?"

	"Moonshade, honey."

	"Oops."

	Moonshade sighed.   "Please tell me you didn't..."

	"I didn't tell her what they called you on that trumpvision show you told Uncle 
Morgy you were going to kill him for showing it to me this time."

	Davros and Moonshade vibrated in union.

	"Should I have?"

	"NO!"

	Deirdre shrank in on herself.  Moonshade sighed and stroked her hair.  "I'm sorry, 
honey.  Mommy just worries about you."

	"I'm okay now."

	Samantha said, "Is there anything else I can help you with before I get back to 
work?"  Please don't sue, she thought.  Please don't sue.

	"Are you one of the actors for the nightly abyss shows?" Davros asked.

	"Yes, I play Deirdre of Amber."

	"Is it suitable for children?" Davros asked.

	"Oooh, I wanna go!  I wanna go!" Deirdre proclaimed.

	Samantha glanced over at her, then said, "Well, children do have to learn about 
these things some time.  There's no foul language, but there is some violence and 
simulated death.  Good triumphs over evil, but at a cost."

	"There is always a cost," Davros said softly.  "In real life, the heroes rarely all 
walk away from the most important battles."  He turned and looked over at Moonshade.  
"What do you think?"

	"She's just a kid," Moonshade said.  "We should take her to see the Funk Elves.  
Even if she would get to see some asskicking at this show."

	"I wanna see Deirdre fight evil!" Deirdre proclaimed.  "And I'd like some ice 
cream."

	"You already had some with me," Samantha said.

	"_More_ ice cream."

	Moonshade frowned.  "It's not bloody, is it?"

	"We had a bad incident with the fake blood coming to life and trying to kill 
people, so we don't even bother with it now."  Samantha willed herself not to think about 
that disaster.

	"Please, please, please?" Deirdre begged.

	Moonshade sighed.  "Okay.  But I'm gonna laugh at you when you have 
nightmares tonight.  And if you do, Davros gets to go sleep in the closet."

	"I won't have any nightmares!" Deirdre said.  "And I won't try to hide in the 
pantry and knock all the sphagetti on myself either."

	Davros frowned thoughtfully, glanced at Deirdre, then said, "I will have to think 
about it.  Thank you for taking care of Deirdre, and may the Serpent watch over you...."

	"Samantha," Samantha said.

	"Good day, then."  And then they left.

	"Whew, no law suit," Ritsuko said once they were out of earshot.

	"I have a bad feeling Mr. Davros is going to end up in the closet.  Or with one of 
his other wives.  Or whatever exactly is going on in that family."

	"Probably Mormons."

	"Chaosians."

	"Ahh," Ritsuko said understandingly.

*******************

	"Why exactly are we doing this?" Moonshade asked Davros again.

	"Because it's her birthday and she really wants to," Davros replied.  "And perhaps 
there's a lesson to be learned."  He looked across the open space in front of the 'Abyss', 
one of the less realistic attractions of Dworkinland, as it was just a big pit full of smoke.  
Lots of people sat restlessly, waiting for the Abyss show to start.

	"Motoko's going to kill us."

	"She's going to kill us as soon as she hears about Deirdre and the tank, so we 
might as well run up our account and get killed for everything at once."

	"You sound like Mitsune," Moonshade said.

	Davros looked embarrassed.  "I just..."

	"Daddy, is Motoko-mommy gonna be mad at us?" Deirdre asked.

	"Probably."

	"She's going to crucify us,"  Moonshade pointed out.

	"Then why are we still here?" Deirdre asked.

	"'Cause it's your birthday and you wanted to come."

	"I don't wanna get you in trouble.  She won't send you to bed without dinner, will 
she?"

	"We're going to eat here," Davros said.  "I was thinking we could try Gabrielle's 
Grill."

	"Steak," Moonshade said, sounding like a man dying of thirst in the desert.

	"I wish Miroku could have come," Deirdre said.

	"You miss him?" Davros asked.

	"Then he'd get spanked too like he needs to be."

	Moonshade laughed.  "I'm sure Mitsune's spanking him for making her get stuck 
at home while we ran off and had fun."

	"Daddy, can I ask you a question?" Deirdre asked Davros.

	"Sure."

	"Why do people always get confused when I tell them about our family?"

	Moonshade said, "'Cause people are stupid."

	Davros said, "Well, our family is very special.  Most families just have one 
mommy and one daddy."

	"Uh huh," Deirdre said.  "Like Uncle Beowulf and Aunt Lily and Telemain."

	"Yes," Davros said.

	"So why do I have three mommies?"

	Moonshade glanced across the 'stage' and wondered when the show was ever 
going to start.

	"Because when the Serpent married Motoko, he declared that she might choose 
three people to live with her forever, to be her friends and lovers, to take care of her, and 
play with her.  So she chose me and Isillome and Mitsune, because we all loved her very 
much, and because we loved each other too."  Davros' voice stumbled a bit as they talked.  
"You're going to ask me about Akari's father next, right?"

	"Oh wow, you read my mind, Daddy!" Deirdre said.

	"Moriya died saving Mitsune from being killed," Davros said.  "He was very 
brave and kind and gentle, and a good friend.  Before he died, he and Mitsune made a 
baby, Akari."

	"Like you and Mommy made me."

	"Exactly," Davros said.  "But before Akari was born, the four of us had to perform 
a very holy rite..."

	"Which made babies," Moonshade said, grinning.  "And involved someone 
squealing with a very high pitched voice."

	Davros blushed.  "Isillome..."

	"Oh yes, Mooooootoooookoooooooo," Moonshade mock moaned.

	"Isillome..."

	"Did you ask daddy to rock you like a hurricane?" Deirdre asked Moonshade.

	Moonshade turned red.  "Dammit, Motoko assured me the soundproofing would 
work!"

	Davros, who now wanted to die, asked Deirdre, "Did you hear that through the 
walls?"

	"Uncle Morgy says that Uncle Saionji is jealous because he wishes he could rock 
as many women like a hurricane as you do, Daddy.  Is that how you make babies?"

	"Uncle Morgy needs to learn what not to say to children," Moonshade mumbled.

	Davros decided it was best not to argue the point.  "Yes, Daddy makes babies by 
rocking people like a hurricane."

	"So why doesn't Motoko-mommy have a baby?" Deirdre asked.

	Davros and Moonshade sat uncomfortably at that.  Finally, Moonshade said, 
"Three babies was as many as we could handle at once."

	"Miroku didn't really eat her baby, did he?"

	Moonshade's eyes widened.  "Who the fu...who told you that?"

	"I saw that in a movie, where the bad baby ate the good one."

	"Did Uncle Morgy show you this movie?" Moonshade asked.

	"Uh huh."

	"And the brain-eating zombies one?"

	"I had nightmares for a week."

	Davros said, "No more letting him babysit."

	"But Daddy, he's lots of fun!"

	"Some kinds of fun are bad for you."

	"Like when Miroku tried to eat all the candy and choked."

	"Exactly."

	A horn played, cutting off all conversation; the show was about to begin.  They 
sat and watched quietly as the battle of the Courts of Chaos took place before their eyes.  
Far off across 'The Abyss', one could just barely make out the Duel Called Revolution 
being played out for another audience.

	The battle raged, and then Brand stood at the edge of the Abyss, holding 'Deirdre' 
hostage as he harangued his family.

	Deirdre got tense in Davros' arms.  "She's gonna be okay, isn't she?" she 
whispered.

	Moonshade muttered something about Motoko and death and bad ideas.

	Davros felt his resolution wavering.  What AM I doing, he thought.  She's just 
five, and we didn't HAVE to say yes to this.  It's a lesson everyone needs to learn 
eventually, but she's still so young...  Too late now, he thought.  Motoko's going to kill 
us, this is going to give her nightmares, and it's all my fault for being stupid, he thought.  

	A crossbow twanged.  'Brand' got hit and tumbled backwards, then managed to 
grab 'Deirdre', who tumbled in backwards with him.  They fell into the darkness, and the 
family of Amber played out their horror.

	Deirdre watched in horror.  "No!  He pulled Deirdre into the Abyss with him!  
She's going to die too!"

	"It's all just a show, honey," Moonshade said, glaring over at Davros, who wished 
he could turn into a bird and fly away.  "They're just showing a made up story."

	Deirdre said, "Can't you save her, Daddy?"

	"Honey, it's just a show.  They'll get mad if I charge out into the middle of it," 
Davros said soothingly, stroking her hair.  "She'll be fine afterwards."

	The rest of the story played itself out, and then the audience dispersed.  Deirdre 
sat tensely in her father's lap, on the verge of crying.  Finally, some of the crew brought a 
winch out, and winched up 'Deirdre' and 'Brand' out of the 'Abyss'.  Brand's face looked 
somewhat smooshed, and he was rubbing his cheeks.  "You didn't have to land on my 
face, you know."

	"You're the one who tried to roll me to one side by grabbing my breasts," 
Samantha retorted.  

	Deirdre leaped up and ran over to her.  "You're okay!  You're okay."

	"Of course I'm okay.  It's all just a show."  She picked Deirdre up and showed her 
what lay halfway down the Abyss, namely a very sturdy safety net.  "We just land on that 
every night."

	Deirdre gave a great sigh of relief.  "So you're okay?"

	"I kinda landed on David's face, so he's not all okay, but I am."

	"Okay.  You wanna come have cake with us?  Motoko-mommy said she was 
going to make a very nice one for me and Miroku, even though he's grounded."

	She blinked and looked over at Deirdre's parents.  Davros said, "That is fine with 
me if you want to invite her, Deirdre.  You don't mind, do you?" he asked Moonshade.

	"Fine by me.  We probably ought to let her get out of the armor, though."

	"Well, I've got to go clock out and everything, but...okay, sure," Samantha said.  
"I'll meet you at the West Gate in an hour, okay?"

	"Okay!" Deirdre said.

********************

	Samantha had trumped before, but it wasn't something she ever had gotten used 
to; the Dworkinland staff had a few people who could make trumps, thanks to having 
walked the Broken Pattern of Dworkinland.  Samantha had walked it herself; all of the 
staff had to survive walking it.  Some people seemed to get a little crazy obsessive with 
preserving the order of the park after they walked it, but she didn't feel like she was any 
different.  Sometimes she wondered if she was, and just couldn't tell.

	They landed in a foyer, where armed guards in Unicorn livery saluted all of them 
but her.  She waved in the cheerful manner polished by years of working for an 
amusement park.  

	She tagged along as Deirdre gave her running commentary on everything in the 
Embassy and as Davros carefully corrected half the commentary.  They soon came to a 
fancy dining room where a large chocolate cake and ice cream had been laid out.  Two 
children were there, and two elegantly dressed women.  The boy was dark haired; the girl 
was a red head.  Both of them were about the same age as Deirdre.  The taller and more 
slender of the two women had short dark hair, and wore an expensive dress in a Cathayan 
style, white cotton cloth with a phoenix printed on it in red and black and grey.  The 
shorter, stockier woman wore a shimmering green dress with a winking fox printed on it.  
She had a rose tucked in her hair over her left ear.  Both wore a ring which showed the 
unicorn and the serpent chasing each other's tails, which matched rings worn by Davros 
and Moonshade.

	The little boy asked, "Did you have fun?"

	"We had lots of fun!" Deirdre said.  "I got to ride on a tank and level a Cathouse!"

	The taller woman, who had started to cross over to Davros and Moonshade, now 
froze up.  "You what?"

	Moonshade said, "We'll tell you the whole story after the little party, so you can 
kick our ass."

	The taller woman started to say something, noticed Samantha and fell silent, 
though she took on a somewhat frozen look.  "Alright."

	Davros said, "Motoko, this is Samantha, who works at Dworkinland.  She helped 
us out when Deirdre got lost, and Deirdre invited her to come and have cake with us."

	"You lost Deirdre?" Motoko asked.

	"They got lost, but me and Deirdre and the pony-tail girl and the tank found them.  
In Queen Cait's Funland," Deirdre said.

	Motoko's flesh rippled gently for a moment.  "In Queen Cait's Funland."

	"You went to Queen Cait's Funland and didn't take me and Motoko?  I think two 
people are sleeping on the couch tonight," the shorter woman said with a tone of mock-
anger.

	"We were wandering around and..."  Davros began.

	"We did not leave her behind to go to Queen Cait's Funland without you," 
Moonshade said.  "Now, why don't we have some cake, okay?"

	Akari waggled a finger at Davros.  "You're a very bad man," she said solemnly.

	"Cake is great!" Miroku proclaimed.  He scrambled up into a chair and grabbed a 
fork.  "Hit me!"

	Motoko began to solemnly cut the cake.  Samantha sat down by Deirdre, feeling a 
little uncomfortable.   Deirdre reached over and patted her left hand, then half climbed up 
on her and whispered in her ear, "They'll kiss and make up later."

	"So you play Deirdre in the Abyss show?" Motoko asked Samantha as she served 
her some cake.

	She nodded.  "Yes, for the last two years.  It gets boring sometimes, but the pay is 
good, and the benefits are nice.   And I have to admit that having people take photos with 
me is pretty cool."

	"Oooh, daddy, you need to take a picture of me with her!" Deirdre said.  "You 
took pictures, didn't you?"

	Davros nodded.  "Yes, I did," he said, patting the camera.  "So long as no one tries 
to eat it, we'll be fine."

	"I didn't try to eat the camera," Miroku said.  "That was Random."

	"I know, son," Davros said.  

	Motoko moved on to serve cake to Moonshade, and asked Samantha, "Would you 
like some wine?  Or is the fruit juice fine with you?"

	"I'm fine, Madam Ambassador," Samantha said.  "Fruit juice is okay with me."

	"Mitsune, if you will," Motoko said to Mitsune.  

	Mitsune began pouring everyone fruit juice.  "Don't you ever get tempted to break 
the script?" she asked Samantha.

	"Oh, that's how my predecessor got fired.  She wanted to show off for her 
boyfriend and just picked up Brand and tossed him in."

	Mitsune laughed.  "That's the spirit."

	"I sure wish I could do that sometimes, but I like getting paid."

	"With your Broken Pattern imprint, you could get all the money you want," 
Motoko pointed out.

	"I guess, but I'm used to having to work for a living, and most of the time, it's fun. 
I have gone on recruiting runs into Shadow a few times, though.  And usually, I like this."

	Akari began cutting up some of the napkins into puppets as she waited for her 
cake to be served.  Mitsune started to reach over to stop her, then sighed and said, "Next 
time, ask Mommy for paper, okay?"

	"Okay, mommy," Akari said.

	The puppets began to dance as Motoko laid down a slice of cake for Akari, then 
finally cut one for herself.  Samantha watched them in amazement.  "Wow, that's really 
great, Akari."

	"Thank you," she said, smiling a little more.

	"They'd better not make a move on my cake like they did at your birthday party," 
Miroku said.

	"They don't like bad people cake," Akari said, stuffing her slice of cake in her 
mouth.

	Motoko said, "No arguing at the dinner table, children."

	The kids all shut up.

	For a little while, they all ate cake in silence, then Moonshade asked, "How did 
the meeting with Duke Koli go, Motoko?"

	"Thankfully, the Duke agreed to withdraw his request for a duel with Lord 
Loewen, so I cancelled the funeral arrangements."

	Samantha started to laugh, then realized no one else was and stifled herself.

	Davros said, "Good, good.  I'll save the eulogy for a future occasion, then."

	"Did you have to flash your breasts at him this time, Mitsune?" Moonshade asked 
Mitsune.

	"I'm not flashing anything but my pale arms in this outfit," Mitsune said.  

	"And your lovely face," Motoko said absently as she worked on her cake.

	Mitsune said, "I think he goes for tall, elegant women anyway."

	Motoko frowned at her cake.  "Not another one."

	"Hey, you have to use whatever advantage you can get, when dealing with these 
sorts of fools," Mitsune said.  "As Mom always told me, sometimes you have to stoop to 
conquer."

	"Lady Yumi is, as usual, correct," Motoko said.  "But I do not enjoy stooping."

	"I enjoy sledding," Miroku said, trying to do his part in the conversation.  "You 
should try that."

	Motoko looked up and stared at him for just a second, then asked, "Not 
bobsledding, I hope."

	"Mommy says I'm not old enough for bobsledding," Miroku said.

	"Good, good."

	Samantha opened her mouth, then shut it again.  Then she said, "Why did the 
Duke want to duel with Lord Loewen?"

	"He's a suicidal moron," Mitsune said.  

	"Duke Koli wanted to see for himself if it was true that Lord Loewen was a better 
swordsmaster than himself," Motoko said.  "As he is noted for his own skills, polished 
through years of study and discipline."

	"Which rotted his brain," Moonshade said.  "I wouldn't duel Loewen and I'm a 
damn sight better than Duke Koli.  He ain't bad, mind you.  He'd probably kick any of the 
rest of you's ass with a sword.  But Loewen would kick his ass."

	"Especially since his family insignia is that ugly dog rampant," Mitsune said.

	Motoko nodded.  "I convinced him that Lord Loewen is growing old and that it 
would be unfair for a young and healthy man to fight a convalescent.  I pray Lord 
Loewen never hears I said that."

	"But isn't he rather convalescent?" Samantha asked.  "I know little of Chaos, but I 
do know he's been a bandaged half-dead mummy for decades now."

	Motoko replied, "Sadly, yes.  But Loewen half-dead is more deadly than most 
people not dead at all."

	Samantha said, "We have a 'Loewen', but I'm sure he's not half as scary as the real 
thing."

	"o/~Loewen eats boats o/~", Miroku sang.

	Davros choked on his cake.  

"Who taught you that song?" Motoko asked sharply.

	"I made it up myself from one of Uncle Morgy's songs."

	Deirdre pounded Davros on the back.  "Don't choke, Daddy!"

	"I'll try to not choke," he choked out, then drank some apple juice.  "All better, 
see?"

	"Good, good.  I don't want you to die like Akari's daddy did," Deirdre said.

	For a moment, all of the resident adults present looked like they'd been whacked 
with hammers.  Akari paled.  Miroku quickly grabbed more cake with the look of 
someone planning to evacuate.

	Samantha leaped into the breach saying, "You shouldn't talk about dying at the 
dinner table, Deirdre."

	"Oh, okay," Deirdre said.  "I'm sorry."

	Akari said, "You just think you're special because it's your birthday and you got to 
go to Dworkinland while I had to stay here with my stupid brother!"

	"At least I don't wet my bed," Miroku said.

	"I do NOT wet the bed!" Akari shouted.

	"Now, now, Miroku, we all know that was you pouring water in her bed," 
Mitsune said to Miroku.  "It's your birthday, be nice."

	"Don't wanna be nice.  I had to stay home 'cause she was stupid and sent her paper 
dolls after me!"

	"You kept talking about how you were going to get your daddy to take you on the 
Logrus with him!"

	Davros sighed.  "Now, now brothers and sisters should love each other, and not 
fight at the dinner table on their birthday."

	"It's not _my_ birthday," Akari pointed out.  "And he started it by bragging."

	"Akari, be quiet," Motoko snapped.  "Miroku, stop taunting your sister.  
Deirdre..."  She sighed.  "Don't start anything."

	"Okay," Deirdre said.  She finished her cake. "Can we play _Fungi From 
Candyland_ now?   I wanna show Deirdre how to play."

	"You're Deirdre," Akari pointed out.

	"Sure, I'd be happy to play," Samantha said, her instincts for trying to defuse 
conflicts kicking in.  "I'm sure that would be a lot of fun.  You three can all show me how 
to play while the adults clean up and go do boring adult stuff."

	Moonshade said, "I'll go get it."

	Motoko and Mitsune and Davros quickly cleaned up the food and vanished into 
the house.  Moonshade returned with the game, and set it up, then said, "We'll be in the 
kitchen if you need us, okay?"

	"Okay," Miroku said.  "Have fun!"

	"Oh yeah, more fun than being a dog in Helgramways," Moonshade muttered and 
vanished into the depths of the house.  

	"Okay, pick a hand," Miroku said to Samantha, holding out two clenched fists. 

	"Hmm, that one," she said.

	He frowned.  "Can't you pick the other one?"

	She laughed.  "Okay."
	
	Akari pointed and laughed.  "I bet the blue one was in the hand she picked first!"

	This was proven correct, though Samantha now took the green one from the other 
hand.  Akari took the red one and Deirdre took the yellow piece.

	They all set up their pieces at the start, then Miroku said, "Okay, we go round the 
table like this," he gestured clockwise.  "Everyone flips a card over on their turn, and 
moves to the next space of that color.  If you have two squares, you move twice.  Some 
squares let you take shortcuts."  He pointed to some.  "And these squares," he pointed to 
others.  "You get partly eaten by evil flesh-eating zombie fungi from beyond space and 
time!"

	"And have to move back down the slide, like that one," Akari said, pointing to 
one of the slides.  "Where you get better and keep going."

	"Who goes first?" Samantha asked.

	"Deirdre can, since she's oldest," Miroku said.

	"I'm oldest!" Akari protested.  

	"Okay, you go first," he said.

	She blinked, then went.

	The map was basically a big s-shape.  Miroku's luck was good, and he soon pulled 
into the lead, frequently narrating his piece's adventures with the evil fungi.  "Okay, so 
the great hero Maverick sneaks past the evil green fungi."  He moved his piece a step.  
"Then, he comes to where the horrible purple broccoli monsters live!"

	"Broccoli is green," Akari pointed out.

	"That's why it's horrible monsters!  Exposed to Moonshade-mommy's cooking, it 
has become a terrible flesh-eating beast!"

	Samantha laughed.  "That bad, huh?"

	"Daddy says it's beyond good and evil," Deirdre said.  "C'mon, Miroku, finish 
moving before it's our next birthday."

	"Then Maverick leads the broccoli monsters into the giant blue squash patch.  
Broccoli and squash fight it out to the death while he sneaks off into the orange blossom 
tree fungi."  He placed his piece down.  "There."

	Samantha flipped a card over.  "Okay, the mighty heroine Deirdre is attacked by 
the purple werewolf fungi."  She moved her piece.  "But she picks them up and breaks 
their backs, because she's strong.  So then she meets up with her big-mouthed brother 
Corwin, and they go through the green fungal forest, to the yellow corn fields, where they 
encounter Julian, and have to hide from him until next turn."  She put her piece down.

	Deirdre was next; she sighed as she only got to move one square.  "Joan stops to 
buy some pizza from the red fungi, but she can't pay, so they make her wash dishes to 
pay for it."

	Akari flipped a card and smiled.  She quickly moved from one red space past all 
the other colors to another red one that had a shortcut.  "Because she's sweet and gentle, 
Mysteria is helped by all the fungi to get ahead of everyone else, and they show her a 
short cut."  She zipped her piece ahead.

	"Double Orange!  WOO!" Miroku shouted.  "Because Maverick is the baddest 
bad bad ass who ever was bad, all the fungi bows down before him and grovels for 
mercy!  Then they carry him all the way to THIS square," he moved his piece to it.  
"Before they collapse under the weight of his invincible..."

"Invulnerable," Akari said.

"Coat of Arnold!"  Miroku finished.  

	"Arnd," Akari said.

	"Whatever."

	The game went on for nearly a half-hour with many twists of fate.  Finally, 
Miroku got lucky and got the green he needed to make it to the last square.  "Maverick 
turns his arms into hedge trimmers, then trims all the evil fungi out of the way, finally 
making it back to civilization where he gets lots of cake and ice cream."

	"Then he bloats up and gets sick from too much candy," Akari said.  

	"Let's play again!" Deirdre said.

	After three more games, Miroku won twice, Akari won once, Deirdre won once, 
and Samantha was just out of luck.  Deirdre patted her hand.  "Don't worry, we all lose 
sometimes," she said kindly.

	"Maybe next time," Samantha said.

	"I'm afraid it's time for all good children to go to bed," Motoko said, striding in.

	"So when's Miroku going to bed?" Akari asked.

	"At least my bed will be dry," Miroku said.

	Akari looked at him in frustration, then ran off crying.  Miroku's face fell.  "I'm 
sorry!" he shouted.  "I didn't mean to make you cry!"  

	"Miroku, you shouldn't tease your sister," Motoko said sternly to him.

	"Yeah!" Deirdre said.

	"I didn't mean to make her cry," he said weakly, looking a little close to tears 
himself.  "She usually just yells back at me."

	"Well, you pushed her too far," Motoko said. "Now go apologize to her and get 
ready for bed."

	"Okay, Motoko-mommy," he said.  "Do I get a goodnight kiss?"

	She bent down and kissed his forehead.  "Now, go be good."

	"I will," he said, then ran off.

	Deirdre turned to Samantha, "I'd better go to bed.  You can ask Daddy to take you 
home." 

	"I will take her home," Motoko said.  She bent over and kissed Deirdre on the 
forehead.  "Good night, Deirdre."

	"Good night, Motoko-mommy," Deirdre said.  Then she ran off.

	Motoko turned to Samantha.  "I hope this hasn't been too much trouble for you."

	"Oh, no trouble at all.  They're very nice children, and really, the whole tank thing 
was my fault for not saying no."

	"Well, we straightened it all out."  She shook her head.  "I will need a psychic 
impression of where you need to go, although I could teleport you back to Dworkinland 
without one."

	"That'll be fine; I live in a dormitory there," Samantha said.  

	"I suppose our home life must seem strange to you," Motoko said.

	"It's not my place to judge, ma'am," Samantha said.  "Being a guest and all.  As 
long as I haven't caused any trouble in it, I'm satisfied."

	Motoko nodded, seeming pleased by the answer.  "Alright, are you ready?"

	"Ready," she said.

	She felt the shimmer of the magic rush over her, and soon she was standing under 
the half moon and starry sky by the west gate of Dworkinland.  Nothing like a nighttime 
walk to help me sleep, she thought.  She headed for bed.

****************

	"Mommy?" Akari asked as Mitsune tucked her in.  

	"Yes, honey?"

	"Will you sleep with me tonight?"

	"Okay.  I'll be right back once I change outfits, okay?"

	"Okay," Akari said.

	Mitsune went back to her bedroom to change; they all had their own bedrooms, 
although most nights, they usually were sleeping in pairs with someone else or even all 
four in the master bedroom.  Sometimes, they all just felt the urge to sleep alone, and they 
hadn't wanted to try to keep four sets of clothing all in one closet anyway.  

	Then she hoofed it down to Motoko's room, the master bedroom.  Barging in, she 
found Motoko topless, in the process of sliding a long white nightshirt onto herself.  
Motoko instinctively covered herself and blushed.

	Mitsune laughed.  "It's not like I haven't see you more naked than that."

	Motoko finished sliding on the shirt.  "I know, I just..."

	"It's just so cute when you and Davros do that," Mitsune said.  "I should barge in 
on him too."

	"..."

	"But Akari wants me to sleep with her tonight, so I'll be off being a human 
pillow."

	"Alright," Motoko said.  "Miroku was rather rude to her."

	"He came and apologized.  Well, he tried, anyway," Mitsune said.  "We probably 
should have let them all go to Dworkinland.  I'm afraid they'll both be in a snit for days."

	"You can't reward bad behavior," Motoko said.  

	"True," Mitsune said, then came over to Motoko and took one of her hands.  "You 
okay?  You've been jumpy all night."  She squeezed the hand.  "Jealous you didn't get to 
go to Dworkinland?"

	"Of course not," Motoko said.

	"Liar," Mitsune said.

	"You see right through me," Motoko said.  "I could not have gone even if the 
children had been good, since I had to keep a leash on the Duke, but..."

	"I saw your face when the whole Funland thing came out," Mitsune said.  "You 
know they wouldn't leave Deirdre behind like that."

	"I know.  I am just...I am just a silly, jealous woman sometimes."

	Mitsune stepped in closer, then went up on her toes and kissed Motoko on the 
lips.  "Sometimes it's nice to know someone really wants you so much, they can't stand 
missing a chance to have you."

	Motoko embraced Mitsune.  "I fear I must have seemed rather cold and distant to 
our guest."

	"No, you were a good hostess to her," Mitsune said.  "It was just her misfortune 
that we couldn't straighten it all out before then."  She kissed Motoko again.  "And now I 
have to go be a living doll."

	"Doesn't it bother you at all?" Motoko asked.  "When things like this happen?"

	"Miroku making fun of Akari bothers me.  Akari not having her own father 
bothers me.  Having Duke Koli's stupid brother try to pinch my butt bothers me.  Having 
that dress ride up on my butt bothers me.  But I trust both of them not to do anything 
stupid.  Not like that, stupid, anyway.  Stupid like deciding a five year old needs to see 
her new friend fall in the Abyss..."  She sighed.  "Time enough to gain wisdom when they 
get older."

	"It was not entirely a bad idea," Motoko said.  "But the timing was not good, nor 
do you do such things during a birthday celebration."

	"I know, I know," Davros said from the door, having changed into his usual 
pajamas.  He came over and embraced them both, one with each arm.  "She just wanted 
to see her friend and everything, and I just..."

	"Was stupid," Mitsune said.

	"That about sums it up.  It's something we all have to learn, but not when we're 
five."  Davros sighed.  "I'm sorry."

	Motoko extended an arm around him.  "I know you meant well, but..."

	Mitsune leaned over and kissed Davros, then disentangled herself.  "You two 
snuggle.  I have to go make sure Akari doesn't start making her dolls march on Miroku's 
room in her sleep again.  Motoko, you should make them do something special for you to 
apologize for making you worry."

	"Special?" Davros asked.

	"I have no right to..." Motoko began.

	Moonshade came in.  "So, what's the plan for tonight?"

	"You and Davros get to entertain Motoko tonight to apologize for making her fret 
while I go have a sleepover with Akari.  So I'll just have to rip off your clothing 
tomorrow night and have my way with you."

	Moonshade grinned.  "Bring it on, Kitsune.  I'll have my way with you."

	"We'll see."  She kissed Moonshade and headed on out.

	Moonshade strode over to Davros and Motoko.  "Something special, huh?"

	"You don't have to do anything," Motoko said.  "I jumped to conclusions and..."

	Moonshade embraced them both and kissed her.  "Yes, but we WANT to do 
something," Moonshade said.  "'Cause I love you and so does Davros."

	Motoko blushed ever so slightly.  Davros said, "You are the flower of my heart, 
my love."  One of his hands slid up her back along her spine, and she felt her back grow 
warm.  "And I must admit that even just chasing a tank through Queen Cait's Funland is 
enough to give someone naughty thoughts."

	"Now, now, a monk shouldn't have naughty thoughts," Moonshade said teasingly.  
"Or be caressing warrior hussies intimately."

	"I love you both," Motoko said softly.  "And Mitsune as well.  I feel like a fussy 
old mother hen sometimes, the way I worry about things and  I know I don't tell you all 
enough how I feel."

	"We know how you feel," Davros said.  

	"But we never mind hearing it again," Moonshade said.  "Now, how would you 
like your rocking tonight?"  She paused nervously.  "Do you want a rocking tonight?"

	"I'm not quite in the mood," she said apologetically.  

	"Then we'll just have to cuddle up to you so you can have pleasant dreams and be 
all fired up in the morning," Moonshade said.

	Davros picked them both up and carried them over to the bed.  "Goodnight, my 
loves," he said, casually snuffing the lamp with his spikard.

	"I don't feel right leaving Mitsune by herself," Motoko said softly as they cuddled 
up to each other.

	"Well, I don't think Akari wants either of us there, or you," Davros said.  "And 
she won't be alone, since she has Akari with her."

	"That's true."  Motoko sighed.

	"Feeling guilty again?" Moonshade asked her.

	"You always see right through me, Isillome," Motoko said to her.  

	"So does Davros, he just isn't willing to be rude about it like I am," Moonshade 
said.  "Akari has to know we all love her like she was our own, just like you love Miroku 
and Deirdre.  There ain't jack we can do about Moriya being dead, so don't fret about it."

	"Isillome is right, my love.  We do everything for Akari that we can, and while 
Moriya will be reborn one day, I do not think that day is yet come.  We must live for the 
living, though we remember the dead," Davros said.  

	"I know.  My mind knows your words are true, but the heart has its own reasons."

	"Rest my love, and let your heart be at ease," Davros said, gently brushing her 
cheek with one hand.

	"I should have..." Motoko began, then sighed.  "I should go to sleep instead of 
endlessly dissecting what I would have done if I had been all knowing and all seeing."

	"I always find a good wrestling match helps me sleep," Moonshade suggested.

	"I always find we have to fix the furniture after you and Davros have one of your 
matches," Motoko said dryly.  "And once you're done, you're randier than a herd of goats.  
Not to mention, I'd last only about five seconds against either of you."

	"Just trying to help," Moonshade said.

	"I know."  Motoko closed her eyes.  "See you both in the morning."

	She heard their breathing change soon after that as they both slipped quickly into 
slumber while she stared at the inside of her eyelids.  All of her doubts and worries 
chased each other round and round inside her head.  But they could not long persevere 
while she lay in the arms of her lovers, and sooner than she had feared, sleep took her.

*******************

	Akari cuddled up to her mother.  "Mommy, why did Daddy have to die?"

	Because I was too stupid to think we could ever lose a fight, she thought, feeling 
icy fingers clutch at her heart.  Because he went into the fight badly hurt already because 
Lily and Keitaro and I were mostly deadweight until I finally remembered to actually use 
my damn shapeshifting.  Because we were all too stupid to ask ourselves why one of the 
most powerful weapons in the universe would be in a place as poorly guarded as that 
place seemed before we got into it.  "Moriya died saving me and your Aunt Lily and your 
Aunt Shinobu and your Uncle Beowulf and your Uncle Keitaro.  We got trapped in a 
very bad place, and had to fight a very evil, strong man.  Your daddy beat him, but he 
died from his wounds."  She sighed.  "We all goofed up.  We never should have been 
there in the first place."

	"Is Daddy ever coming back?" Akari asked.

	"One day, your daddy will be reborn, once he's ready.  He'll be a baby, and then a 
little boy like Miroku, and then he'll be an adult one day."

	"Will you marry him when he gets old enough?"

	Mitsune winced.  "Honey, I'm already married.  And reincarnated people don't 
remember their old lives."

	"But who's going to marry Daddy, then?"

	"I don't know, honey, but I'm sure he'll find someone.  He was very kind and 
loving and strong and brave.  Probably someone much better than me."  She sighed.  I 
wish I knew for sure what he would think of all this.  

	"Mommy, why doesn't grandma live with us?"

	"She doesn't want to live down in Chaos," Mitsune said.  It was technically true, 
though she knew it was more like 'Rimururu doesn't want to live with the people the 
mother of her granddaughter shacked up with shortly after her only son died saving said 
woman'.  "But she loves you, you know that."

	"Uh huh.  And I love Grandma lots," Akari said.  "Mommy, what's a 'cheap 
floozie'?"

	"It's a bad word you shouldn't ever say or the Abyss demons will eat you," 
Mitsune said.

	"Grandma's in trouble," Akari said worriedly.  

	Mitsune sighed.  "Who did Grandma call a cheap floozie?"

	"A lot of people.  And she and Great-Grandma yelled at each other a lot."  Akari 
trembled.  "It was scary."

	Mitsune winced.  "Your uncle Damask didn't offer to try and recreate Moriya 
using Grandma and Grandpa's blood again, did he?"

	"Uncle Damask could bring Daddy back?" Akari asked.

	I'm going to kill myself now, Mitsune thought.  "It wouldn't really be daddy.  But 
he's good at making...toys that look like people."

	"Like my paper dolls?"

	Mitsune nodded.  "Yes, but he does it with...umm...blood."

	"Ewwwwwwww," she said, wrinkling her nose.

	"I can do it too," she said.  "But I haven't, because it would just be a fake Moriya, 
not a real one."

	Akari nodded, then yawned.  "Tell me a story, mommy."

	"Hmmm....Once upon a time, there was a happy little fox who wanted some 
cookies.  But the wicked queen said that cookies were only for dessert.  The happy little 
fox didn't want to wait for dessert, so she decided she'd steal herself some cookies..."  

	Mitsune rambled on, letting her tired brain spin out the story.  By the time she got 
to, "And then the fox sprouted wings and flew to the top cupboard..." Akari had slipped 
off into sleep.

	She kissed Akari on the forehead, then cuddled up to her and slipped off to sleep 
herself.



***********************
	
	Mitsune woke up, feeling flushed all over.  I'm so damn horny, she thought.  
Akari was breathing softly, one arm around her mother, the other clutching a plush bear.  
She smiled at her daughter for a moment, mothering instincts overcoming her hormones.  
She closed her eyes and tried to focus, using the techniques her mother had taught her 
long ago to tamp down on her sex drive.  

	Then there was a gentle tap on her shoulder.  She rolled over and saw a logrus 
tendril.  Groggily, she called up the Logrus herself and extended a tendril to touch it.  
[Mitsune-chan, we are all feeling very, very...umm...worked up, and would like you to 
join us before we all lose control,] Davros said.

	She replied, {I really shouldn't sneak out on Akari.}  Even though I want you 
inside me so bad right now, she thought.  

	[We will miss you, my love,] he said.  [But we're all just...We can try to wait until 
morning.]  He sounded a little guilty.

	{Well...I could link myself into everyone's minds, so at least I could be with you 
in spirit if not in flesh,} she replied.

	[A good idea,] he said.  [And an interesting way to practice our mental linking.]

	{Admit it, you're doing this for the nookie,} she said.

	[I am not just...Well, I'll admit it is a motivation.]

	{_A_ motivation?}  She smiled at him over the link.  

	[I am STILL not just a love monk,] he replied.  [I think.]

	{You'll always be my love monk,} she replied.  She knotted the tendrils together 
and turned back to her daughter, closing her eyes.  {Thunderbirds are go...}


**********************
	
	Motoko sat on a bench next to where Narya was working.  "You could do that 
with magic, you know."

	"I could, yes," he said, as he shoved the shovel into the dirt, then pressed down on 
it with his foot, then levered the dirt out of the hole, tossing it to one side.  Sweat ran 
down his forehead and his bare arms, which Motoko suddenly realized were starting to 
get pretty muscular.  

She watched, fascinated, as a sweat drop ran down out of his sleeve and down his 
arm to his hand.  Once it dripped off, she managed to say, "It's just so..."

"Like a peasant?" he asked.

	"Yes.  No.  Dammit."  She frowned.  "That didn't come out right."

	"Sometimes, it is good to get down on your knees and feel the earth in your 
hands, and let the sun beat down on you.  You could be as strong as your father if you 
spent a few hours a day doing this."

	"I'll never be as strong as father," she said, sighing.  "I inherited mother's talents, 
not his."

	"Well, you'll certainly never be strong if you don't exercise," he said.  He gently 
picked up the bush which was to go into the hole, then lowered it in and took some of the 
dirt he'd pulled out and began to smooth it around the gaps.  

	"I do sword practice every day," she said with just a hint of sharpness in her 
voice.

	"And I do magical practice with you every day, but your mind is stronger than 
mine because you do other exercises too that I don't have time for, while my body is 
stronger than yours because swinging a sword around isn't much work compared to this."

	She sighed.  "I didn't mean to have an argument with you today."

	"Neither did I, but we seem to have managed it anyway."  He rose from the bush 
and paused, then consulted a piece of paper.  He moved down another bush, then took his 
shovel and began to dig that one up.  

	"What I meant was...have you ever thought of running away, Narya?"

	"I did run away after Kentaro beat me up when I was ten, remember?  Although I 
only got as far as Amber City and then got hideously lost for days until the city watch 
found me sleeping on their roof."  He laughed.  "I might still be there if Nanami hadn't 
come down and spotted me in a Watch uniform, playing mascot."

	There was a great crack as a root severed, and then the bush came up.  Narya 
carefully set it to one side.  "Your mother driving you crazy again?" he asked.

	"Yes.  I want to know about my heritage, but she won't talk about it, and she gets 
mad when I come and spend time with you and I think she's looking for some nobleman 
for me to marry," Motoko said.

	"Father keeps making marriage noises at me too," Narya said.  He went to his cart 
and lifted out another bush, then settled it into the hole the first one occupied.  "But not 
very clear ones.  I will miss you if you go."

	"I want..."  She hesitated.  "Is there...I mean...would you..."

	He continued to work patiently, knowing from experience that Motoko would 
eventually get it all out.  "If there is anything I can do to help you prepare, just let me 
know."

	"I want you to come with me," she blurted out.  "I don't want to do this by 
myself."

	"Alright," he said.  "When do we leave?"

	"I mean, I know you like it here, and it's a long ways to go, and Mother will be 
very angry with you if you come with me, and Grandmother will probably send the watch 
after us and..."

	He smiled softly, then said, "I will gladly face any danger with you, Motoko."

	"I mean, I know I'm not always the nicest person to be around, and sometimes I 
can be pretty..."

	He finished patting the dirt into place around the new bush, then turned and took 
her hands.  "I said yes.  I will go with you, wherever you may lead."

	"You will?"

	"To the very Courts of Chaos themselves, and beyond into other universes 
through the Cave of Worlds if need be."  He leaned in closer, and she stared at his 
angular features, feeling her heart beat faster.  "When do we leave?"

	She leaned closer to him.  "I can go and book us passage on a ship tonight," she 
said.  "We could leave...tomorrow?"

	"We will probably want to prepare spells for our trip, so make it two days.  I don't 
have to work tomorrow, so we can go somewhere and get ready," he said.

	She nodded, then smiled slightly.  "Together."  She took a deep breath, then 
closed her eyes and leaned forward.

	He closed his eyes, then leaned forward and kissed her fiercely.  She pulled him 
up onto the bench with her, and laid back on it, wrapping her arms around him.  His 
sweat stained her expensive clothing, but she didn't care.


************

	"I still say we ought to just find Sauron and break him in half over our knees," 
Isillome said, as she stood by the railing and gazed off to the northeast towards the lands 
they were approaching.  

	"We are to be guides to men, and teachers.  They must overcome Sauron on their 
own, if indeed Sauron is rising again, for this world is to be theirs, not ours," Mithrandir 
said, smoking as usual as he too gazed across the ocean towards the lands they could not 
yet see but would soon approach.

	"Order and discipline," Curunir said.  "That is the key.  After all, they have cast 
down Sauron before, and that was when he possessed his ring.  Properly equipped with 
the arts we can teach them, properly organized and lead, I am sure they will be equal to 
the task.  And if not, then we can consider other courses."

	Melokewen nodded.  "Exactly.  Isillome and I will pass into the east, while 
Mithrandir and Curunir guide the west, and Radagast marshals the animals to aid us all."  
She tossed back her long black hair.  She was the tallest of the five gathered together 
upon the decks.  "I fear we will find battle enough in the east, for the shadow seems 
stronger there, further from Valinor."

	"I sure hope so," Isillome said.  She patted her sword, Sansacure.  "I didn't spend 
five years making this thing just to use it to cut cake."

	"Do not be so eager for battle," Mithrandir said.  "Though I fear there will be 
menaces which only we five can fight.  Many of Morgoth's old evils sleep, waiting to be 
found."

	Melokewen leaned over the side and looked down, subconsciously fingering her 
necklace of beads as it swung forward.  "Are you planning to swim all the way there with 
the dolphins, Radagast?"

	"You should come down and play with them, Melokewen.  It would do you 
good," he shouted up, laughing.

	"Hmm, that could be fun.  Here, hold this for me, won't you?" Isillome asked 
Mithrandir, passing her sword to him.

	He took it and leaned it against the railing, smiling slightly as he had a pretty 
good idea what was coming next.

	"Are you planning to jump over the side?" Melokewen asked Isillome.  "You'll 
ruin your outfit in the sea water."

	She grinned.  "Well, I wasn't planning on going alone."

	"I...WHAT?"

	And then she scooped Melokewen up in her arms and kissed her on the lips, then 
vaulted over the side.  "When you work in the forges, you stop caring what your clothing 
gets like."

	"Isilloooooommmmmeeeeee!!!!!"  Melokewen shrieked as they plummeted into 
the cold water.

*************

	"So where does Bumpy have the goods?" Mona Shade demanded, pounding her 
fist on the desk of Vinnie the Weasel.  

	Vinnie reminded himself that staring at her large breasts, even if they did tend to 
rise pleasingly out of her black bustier, was a good way to die.  Especially with her 
partner, David "the Wolf" Roswell standing next to her with a crowbar in one hand and a 
9mm pistol slung on his hip.  "I ain't telling you nothin'!  I got rights, ya know!"

	"It's crowbar time," Mona said to David.  

	"Ahh, no beatings!  New suit!  New suit!"

	David broke Vinnie's desk in half with one blow.  Then he bashed in Vinnie's 
sixth grade street hockey trophy.  He plucked the autographed football off the top of a 
filing cabinet and punted it out the window.  "God doesn't like people who smuggle 
drugs, Vinnie."  He plucked the crucifix off the wall.  "How can you mock him like that, 
making him watch you peddle dope?"

	"I thought priests were supposed to be non-violent and celibate!"  Vinnie shouted.  
"And put Jesus back up on the wall!  You're gonna scuff him!"

	David put the crucifix back, then took the crowbar to the autographed picture of 
Sylvester Stallone which hung below it and to its right .  "And what's this?  The thief who 
repented?  Vinnie, Vinnie, Vinnie..."  He turned to face Vinnie.  "The Order of Saint 
George is a very ancient institution, Vinnie.  Mostly we fight monsters that lurk in the 
shadows, but for you, we're going to make an exception."

	"But...I know you guys shag like weasels, 'cause we got those blackmail pictures 
through the cameras at that cheap hotel you're staying at, and I know that..."

	"YOU TOOK PICTURES?"  Mona lunged across the ruins of the desk and picked 
up Vinnie by his neck.  "Where are they?"

	"Tomoyo's still developing them..." he choked out.

	David's voice took on a lecturing tone.  "You see, the celibacy of male priests is a 
rule of the Church, but not a dogma.  It wasn't universally instituted until the thirteenth 
century, and even then it took centuries to enforce properly.  Certain groups of priests 
operate under rules which allow for changes in these rules.  For example, in seventeenth 
century Poland-Lithuania, there was an attempt to integrate formerly Ukranian Orthodox 
priests under a special regula, or rule.  The rules of our order do not require celibacy, 
because sometimes sex may be necessary for our missions in order to pass unnoticed as a 
priest until it is too late for the beasts to flee."

	"Wolf, we'll be here all week if you explain the entire canon law to Vinnie," 
Mona said impatiently.  "You're lecturing again."

	"Sorry, honey," he said.  

	"Yeah, but who did you think you were fooling in the hotel room?" he asked.

	"Oh, that was just because we're lovers," he said.  "So when is Bumpy's shipment 
coming in, Vinnie?"

	"So, you're like some kind of nun?" Vinnie asked Mona dubiously.

	"The Order of Saint Joan, of course," Mona said.  "Sister-order to the Georgians."

	"Riiiiiiggghhhttt," Vinnie said.  He tried to reach under his desk and push the 
panic button, then realized his desk had been smashed and he was in fact being held up in 
the air by Sister Mona .

	"Now, you really don't want me calling the rest of the bruthas and the sistas to 
come down here and help us tear your place apart inch by inch, do you?" David asked 
Vinnie.

	"Okay, okay!  Bumpy's getting the stuff in down at Pier 8 at midnight tonight!"

	Mona tossed him into the garbage can.  "Thanks."  She took David by the arm.  
"Let's go beat the crap out of Tomoyo and get those pictures destroyed.  And then I think 
I could do with a little playtime before dinner."

	"A good beating for voyeuristic scum always gets my engine running," he said, 
leaning over and kissing her on the cheek.  

	"I don't think she'll be going on any voyages any time soon," Mona replied.

	Vinnie reached for his cellphone to call Bumpy.  Mona spun and threw a knife 
right through it, pinning it to the wall.  "Don't even THINK about it," she said.

	"Right, right."

**********	
	
	Motoko squirmed a little as Mitsune's hands expertly eased the tensions from her 
muscles.  "Thank you, Motoko."

	"It's no problem.  So how's school going?" she asked Motoko.

	"Remind me again why I can't kill Saionji-sensei."

	"That bad, huh?" Mitsune asked.

	"Yes.  I am sick of his come-ons.  He is a very good kendo instructor, and I have 
learned much from him, but he just...he disturbs me."

	"Want me to trap him naked on the roof again for you?" Mitsune asked.

	"That was you?" Motoko asked.

	"I had help, but yes."  She smiled.  "Maybe you should challenge him to a duel."

	"I would lose," Motoko said.  "There would be no point.  I fear what he would ask 
for if he won."  She gave a little happy sigh as her back loosened up more.  "I hadn't 
realized how tense I was."

	"You need to get laid more often," Mitsune said.

	Motoko blushed.  "I do not."

	"When was the last time you got laid, hmm?" Mitsune asked, moving her hands 
up to work on Motoko's shoulders.

	Motoko said weakly, "It's not polite to ask such things."

	"Since when was I polite, hmm?"  Motoko felt her shoulders tingle, and the 
gentlest touch of Mitsune's mind.  She was using her powers directly now; Motoko felt a 
little guilty that her shoulders were so tense that was necessary.  "Let me guess, you're 
waiting for some perfect imaginary guy who somehow won't notice you scare off every 
man who shows any interest in you by glowering at them just for having a healthy 
interest in something we all need."

	"I do not have impossible standards," Motoko said huffily.  "But I do have 
standards."  She could feel her shoulders getting warm, and her body relaxing.  Mitsune's 
hands moved up and down her back, and for just a moment, she wondered what it would 
be like to kiss Mitsune.  Then she cursed herself for having such a naughty thought.  

	"Everyone has standards.  But I think you're just scared to reach out to someone, 
so you try to convince yourself that no one is worthy of you," Mitsune said.  Her hands 
ran up and down Motoko's spine for a moment, leaving a trail of warmth behind, then 
down her buttocks to Motoko's legs.  Motoko flounced slightly as the hands crossed her 
buttocks.  Mitsune touched them again and watched her jump again, then laughed.

	"Mitsune!" Motoko grunted out.

	"I'll let you touch my butt to make things even if you want."

	Motoko's hand started to come up, then she froze.  "No, no, no."

	"Has someone been thinking naughty thoughts, hmm?" Mitsune asked teasingly 
as she worked on Motoko's left leg.

	"Most certainly not.  I don't have a naughty thought in my head," Motoko said.  
"About you or Thoric or..."

	"Hmmm, so the manager's to your tastes, hmm?"

	Motoko blushed.  "I did not say that.  He's a coward and a weakling and..."

	"And built like a mountain."

	"And has very nice hair and such gentle eyes and I'm not actually saying any of 
this!" Motoko's voice became slightly shrill.

	"I could be Thoric if you need help getting your courage up to approach the real 
thing," Mitsune said.

	Motoko couldn't see Mitsune, but she could feel the power flowing through 
Mitsune where Mitsune's fingertips still touched her.  "You just turned into Thoric, didn't 
you?"

	Long green hair fell down around her head, answering that question.  The bed 
shook as Mitsune-Thoric moved to kneel over her.  She felt her whole body suddenly 
flush, and part of her wanted to just die.  Another part wished it was the real Thoric.  And 
a third part was tempted to see how far Mitsune would actually go with this.  So Motoko 
rolled over and looked up at 'Thoric'.  "I don't think Thoric would be very happy if you 
seduced me in his body."

	"I think he likes you," Mitsune-Thoric said.  "But he's scared you don't like him."

	"He is not the sort of man I should fall in love with," Motoko said softly.  

	"Sure he is," Mitsune-Thoric replied.  "Or would you rather I seduce you myself?"

	Motoko brought a hand up nervously to brush Mitsune-Thoric's cheek, then 
watched 'him' shiver as she did so.  "I want to see your real face," she said softly.

	Mitsune shimmered and became a woman once more.  "M...motoko..." she said 
softly.

	Her arms came up and wrapped around Mitsune, pulling her down.  She kissed 
Mitsune fervently, feeling her body grow warm as she did so.  Finally, she released 
Mitsune's lips, and said softly, "Have you ever been with a woman, Mitsune?"

	"Not many times," she said softly, then kissed Motoko again.  "Is that an 
invitation, my friend?"

	"You're right, Mitsune.  I am scared to let someone in.  But then I realized, just a 
moment ago, that you'd already snuck in when I wasn't looking."  She slid the fingers of 
her left hand into Mitsune's soft hair.  

	"And what about Thoric, hmm?" Mitsune asked.

	"I don't know.  Am I a wicked woman to want more than one person?"

	"Well, speaking as a wicked woman, I can say that I wouldn't mind a piece of him 
either.  So, we could both go rip off his clothing together."  Mitsune flashed a confident 
grin.

	"I'm not quite _that_ bold tonight.  I'll have to settle for ripping off your clothing."

	Mitsune said, "Sounds good to me."

	They had gotten as far as getting each other's tops off when Thoric barged in, 
holding a mop.  "Hey, Motoko, have you see...see...eeeeeeee...."  He stared in shock.

	There was a long and terrible silence.

	Motoko, in a panic, grabbed the shield off her weapon's rack and threw it at him.  
"Out!  Out!  Get out!"

	Ker-clunk!  Thoric staggered out of sight, closing the door as he fell into the 
hallway.  "Sorry..."

	Mitsune sighed.  "We need locks."

	"Very much."

*******************
	
	After a hundred years in the Big House, Stalag Shiz had almost forgotten what the 
sun looked like.  He was pretty sure he remembered what his son looked like, though, and 
unless his eyes were giving out or his son had gone to the Courts and gotten a sex-
change, he was pretty sure the busty ash-blonde waiting for him at the gates in shades, a 
black suit, white shirt, and tie, was not his son.  She looked vaguely familiar, though.

	"Yo, pops," she said.  "Looking good."

	He adjusted his suit slightly, which matched hers.  "Please tell me you ain't my 
son."

	"The Hemingways fucked him up a century ago, remember?"  She pointed to the 
sword slung on her back.  "I iced their main man and took his little toy for myself."  She 
sighed.  "Anyway, me and Moony..."

	"I am NOT A MOONIE!" the woman sitting in the driver's seat of the very sporty 
red convertible shouted, tossing her long pink hair about.  "Call me Shady, or I'll pop you 
a good one tonight instead of giving you sweet lovin'."

	"You Shaft's kid?" Shiz asked as he walked over to the car.

	"Yeah, he got killed by my damn psycho-brother," Shady said.  "'Afore I could 
whack 'im myself."

	"He still in the Asylum?" Shiz asked.

	"Yeah.  Hop in."

	He hopped in the back seat, while the first woman, whose name he still hadn't 
gotten, leaped in the front.  He asked her, "So what's your name?"

	Shady started up the engine and cruised on down the road, leaving the Big House 
behind.  They roared off across the desolate wasteland under the multi-colored sky.

	"Geez, I fucked your son's brains out and had his kid and you still can't 
remember?"

	"Well, my wife's letters just call you 'cheap floozie', so..."

	She growled.  "Did she mention she's now turning tricks in Begma for a living?  
They call her 'Bust Rimururu' now."

	He frowned.  "She WHAT?"

	"Yeah, I told her I promised Morry I'd take care of her, but she didn't like taking 
charity from a 'Cheap Floozie'.  I ain't CHEAP.  Unfortunately, she couldn't be a nun no 
more, and she didn't have any other skills, so now she exotic dances, turns tricks, and 
rolls johns."

	"..."

	"She's pretty good at it, better than you were back in the day, Foxy," Shady 
pointed out as she roared around a turn.  The land began to rise into mountains, and the 
sky filled with geometric shapes.

	"I hear she does assassinations on the side too," Foxy said.  "Anyway, where you 
want us to take you?  I can take you back to the Keep, or we can go hunt up Bustie so you 
can get together with your wife again, or if you wanna meet Carie, we can take you by 
the puppetry studio."

	"Puppetry studio?" he asked.

"Yeah, I wanted to give her all the chances we never had and shit, so when I saw 
how much she liked making paper dolls, I encouraged her to go to some special art 
schools, and now she helps run the Muppets."

	"My granddaughter's in the movies?" he asked, stunned.

	"Yeah, cool as shit," Shady said.  "Although it's her puppets people see, but hey, 
ya gotta take your fame where you can get it."  They crested a ridge and began to descend 
towards a great forest of fungi under a green sky with three blue moons.

	"Where'd you get a car this nice, anyway?" Shiz asked as it raced down the 
highway.

	"Stole it," Shady said.

	"Previous owner was a dumbass who liked to go ninety down the highway, then 
go and have sex with himself on the hood while his passengers screamed and tried to 
keep the car from crashing.  After he took Pinky for a ride like that, me and Moonie 
decided to cap his ass."

	"Don't call me MOONIE," Shady bellowed.

	"I did the 'oh look how young and innocent and seducable I am' routine so he 
picked me up, then when he went up on the hood, I kicked him in the back of the head, 
then took the driver's seat and raced off through shadow with his car."  She patted the 
dashboard.  "It's a very nice machine."  She leaned over and kissed Shady on the cheek.  
"But not half as hot as you are, honey."

	Shady seemed somewhat mollified.  "So where's it gonna be, Stalag Shiz?"

	"I think we'd better head for Begma and see about gettin' ma woman out of the 'ho 
business.  And then I'm gonna fuck up her pimp good," Shiz said.  "And her sister.  This 
is probably all Nakoruru's fault."

	"She's running a temple of ill-repute down in Therin these days, I hear," Foxy 
said.  She turned to Shady.  "You sure you wanna go through with this?  We get too close 
to Amber, and Keiko may try and blow you up with that damn rocket launcher again."

	"I ain't afraid of her or her evil Force powers either," Shady said.  "I tossed her 
down a reactor core twice, I can do it again."

	Stalag Shiz cocked his head.  "Am I hearing bad jazz spontaneously again?"

	Foxy looked up.  "Harpies!"

	Stalag Shiz reached under the front seats and whipped out two Mac-10s.  He 
opened fire on the descending flock of harpies before their hypnotic Kenny G melodies 
could mesmerize his companions too much.  Half of them died in seconds and the rest 
fled.  

	"Damn, you're good," Foxy said.  

	"Where'd you get the Mac-10s?"

	"Ain't much point in having the Pattern tattooed on my back if I'm not gonna use 
it, eh?"

	"True 'nuff," Foxy said.  "Well, put the pedal to the metal, Shady.  We've got a 
thousand miles to cross, it's the middle of the night..."

	They all put on shades in unison.

	"And we're wearing shades."

******************

	Davros sat cross-legged on his pillar, watching the sun set as he said his evening 
prayers.  He felt a little excited.  After years of waiting for a vision, some sort of 
temptation to prove himself against, anything but long days of watching the sun rise and 
set and memorizing every aspect of the desert, he'd been visited by one of the Unicorn's 
temptress demons.  She'd been good at it too.  He'd had to summon everything he'd 
learned and all of his force of will to resist her wiles.

	He hoped she'd come back.  So he could prove his strength in resisting temptation 
of course.  Certainly not because he wanted to see a nearly naked woman dance for him 
and try to take his clothing off.  Nope, this was a test, and he intended to enjoy...pass it.  
Pass it.

	He could see her flying across the desert.  She had white feathery wings like an 
angel, but he knew she was a Unicorn temptress.  She looked just like one of the pictures 
from _Ye Olde Booke of Succubi and Temptresse_.  He'd studied that in great detail; 
know your enemy, after all.

	She wore a long white skirt with the Pattern drawn on it, that sigil of golden evil, 
slit up both sides, showing off her well-muscled legs.  He forced himself not to linger on 
them more than the few seconds allowable to make sure there were no hidden spikes or 
anything.  Which there weren't, just smooth skin and well-developed muscles.  The same 
could be said of her bare arms.  His gaze stayed on them only briefly, no more than was 
allowable.

	Then he moved on to gaze upon her torso.  Her white dress pressed tightly against 
her flesh, covering most of her torso, but cut out in a diamond that showed off the swell 
of her ample bosom.  Her face was quite lovely as well, as was her short ash blonde hair.  
In fact, there was nothing to indicate she was a demon at all, except that she wore 
clothing with the Pattern on it and sought to tempt a faithful stylite to have mad 
passionate sex with her.  

	"Hi, Davros!" she shouted as she flew closer.  "I'm not late, am I?"

	"It's never too late to bathe in the light of the Serpent!  Repent your evil deeds and 
all can be forgiven!"  He began performing the sacred hand signs, hoping he hadn't 
forgotten them in the decades since his initial religious instruction.

	She laughed.  "Now, now, I'm the Archangel Mitsune, not a demoness!"  Flying 
closer, she said, "I've been watching you for a while."

	"Study me for a decade, and you will never break my resolution!" he shouted.  "I 
cannot be tempted by the Unicorn's servants!  Even cute ones!"  Damn me, he thought.  
That will just encourage her.

	Her eyes twinkled in the light of the now rising moon as she drew closer.  "You 
know, you're pretty cute yourself for someone who just sits on a pillar all day."

	"I don't just sit here," he replied.  "I have sacred prayer for an hour three times a 
day, morning meditation, afternoon exercises, and I practice my unarmed combat at 
night."

	She paused.  "How do you practice unarmed combat by yourself on top of a pillar 
with only ten feet of space in all directions?"

	"Through a series of very precisely directed katas designed to be performed on 
top of pillars."

	She nodded.  "I see."

	"And I fall off the pillar about once a week."  He felt embarrassed to admit that.

	"So, right about now, you'd be practicing unarmed combat if I wasn't here, 
'tempting' you, hmm?"

	"Yes," he said.

	"Oooh, I wanna see," she said.  "I bet your sweaty muscles will glimmer in the 
moonlight."

	He twitched.  "It's not supposed to make the Unicorn's Succubi get all..."

	"Hot and bothered?"

	"Yes," he said.

	"Oh, c'mon, please?  After all, how can you expect me to tempt you if you won't 
tempt me back?"

	He stared at her.  Brother Alexis had never mentioned anything about _that_.  "Is 
that...uhh...Am I supposed to be tempting you too?"

	"It would hardly be fair if I had to do ALL the tempting myself, now would it?  
Especially when I have to migrate to tempt you, but you won't even leave your pillar for 
me."

	It did seem fair, he thought.  "Well, alright."  He tried to focus himself, then 
moved into one of the introductory katas to steady his mind and calm his soul.

	Punch, kick, spin, punch, grab, throw, punch, kick, spin, almost fall off pillar, spin 
correctly, punch, punch, high kick, handstand, spin while kicking, handspring, almost fall 
off pillar, kick, kick, punch, elbow smash, spin, kick, punch.  By the time he was done 
with that, he could feel himself falling into the rhythm of well practiced movements.  
Well practiced against the air, anyway.  If it attacked him, he couldn't possibly lose.

	Now he began to move into the more elaborate katas; for the most part he couldn't 
see the temptress at all, though he caught the occasional glimpse of her; she hovered just 
beyond the edge of the platform in the direction the sun usually set.  She seemed quite 
appreciative of his performance, so he decided he would try one of the really fancy ones, 
to show her that she was tempting someone of high skill and grace.

	Performing the Nine Whirlwinds took years of practice.  After the first three 
years, he'd stopped falling off the pillar every single time.  After three more, he no longer 
fell off half the time.  And now he could stay on almost every time.  Not counting the 
parts where you deliberately went off the edge.  Punch, kick, leap and flip, kick in air, 
spin as you come down, kick, punch, spinning kick, advance, leap and flip, kick in air, 
spin as you come down, shapeshift feet into hands, grab edge of pillar with feet-hands, 
flip self back up into air, spin and punch in two directions as feet turn back to feet, land in 
crouch, kick out low, advance, flip backwards, kicking behind you as you land, spinning 
punch at waist, another spinning punch, spinning kick, leap straight upwards, flip in air, 
land on hands, lean 'backwards' to wrap legs around head of imaginary foe, flip 
imaginary foe and land on feet, hop back spinning, go off pillar again, catch edge with 
hands and spring oneself back up into the air, get eyeful of ample bosom of Unicorn 
temptress, use too much force and go flying over the pillar and off the other side out of 
arm's reach, no wait, that wasn't part of it....

	Davros plummeted, his body already beginning to shift to prepare itself for impact 
with the sand.  Then two arms suddenly caught him, and he found himself pressed close 
to a woman's chest as wings beat and he rose into the air in the arms of the Unicorn's 
temptress.  He could smell the scent of lilacs on her, and hear her heart beat counterpoint 
to the beating of her wings.  Resting in her arms was a very comfortable place to be.  

	"Are you alright?" she asked softly.  

	"I am fine," he said.  

	"The trick with turning your feet into hands and flipping back up was very well 
done," she said.

	"Thank you.  It took me a long time to perfect that.  I should have been more 
careful on that last one."

	It seemed to be taking an awfully long time to get back up to the top of his pillar.  
Looking around, he realized that was because they were now flying over forested 
mountains, with the desert receding in the distance.

	"Hey, my pillar!"

	"Oh, I'll bring you back later.  You have to pay attention so you'll know the route 
so you can come and tempt me when it's your turn."

	"Oh, right," he said.  "Although I can just use the Logrus to find your hellpit, then 
pull myself to it without seeing the way."

	"Now, now, I know I need to do the laundry, but don't call it a hellpit until you 
actually SEE it."

	Davros was quite surprised to discover that the vile yet warm and pleasant and 
attractive and sweet-smelling temptress of the Unicorn seemed to live in a nice little one 
story house by a cheerful beach on the far side of the mountains, surrounded by thick, but 
pleasant forest.  The thought struck him that in decades of pillar sitting, he'd never even 
looked to see what lay beyond the horizons he could see from his pillar.  "It's very nice," 
he said in confusion.

	She settled down on the back porch, where a wooden table and two benches sat 
under an elevated tent roof.  "Do you like black mint tea?" she asked.

	"Yes," he said.

	She soon came out with two mugs and a nice hot pot of black mint tea.  He 
savored the taste of it; he hadn't had good tea in years.  The thought then struck him that 
the tea itself was a temptation of the Unicorn, inviting him to revel in the pleasures of the 
material senses.  He decided that since he'd already succumbed, he might as well finish 
the cup, since waste was a sin.  

	She asked, "So how long have you been a Stylite?"

	"Eighty years."

	"That's a very long time," she said, impressed.  

	"Not half as long as Gregor the Holy or Andreas Who Can't Stand Up," Davros 
said.  "I was starting to wonder if the Unicorn was ever going to try to tempt me."

	"I take it the recruiting pamphlets say you'll be assailed by endless visions of 
delectable foods and lines of dancing maidens of the Unicorn from the moment you climb 
up your shaft?" she asked curiously.

	"Well, you do read a lot of memoirs of the more successful stylites that make it 
seem like that.  But most of the time, you meditate, and read holy texts and pray and 
practice the way of the falling hammer and hope for an earthquake or a tidal wave to 
change the landscape."  He paused.  "Pretend I didn't say that last bit."

	"What last bit?" she asked, grinning.

	"The bit...oh, thank you," he said instinctively, even though he knew you 
shouldn't thank vile, yet nubile, pleasant, friendly, and kind temptresses of the Unicorn.  

	She reached over and patted his hand.  "You're welcome."

	"So how long have you been tempting monks to abandon themselves to carnal 
pleasure?"

	"Hmm...two days."

	"..."

	"You're my first case," she said.  "I was talking to Rimururu-san about you, and I 
thought that anyone who tried to claim there were no nudity taboos in Chaos to get 
women he'd just met to bathe with him was someone I could learn a few things from."

	He twitched.  "I was young and mired in the flesh, then," he said weakly.  He 
could feel his body stir as he remembered them.  They had both been young and pretty, 
and he had been going through one of his periods of despair over his lack of exciting 
spiritual combat, and...

	"Probably not half as good looking as you are now," she said.  "Or I'd imagine 
they'd have pretended to be fooled."  She paused.  "You could try to fool me," she 
winked.  "I could imagine you'd want a bath after that workout.  Or would you like to 
show me the rest of it?  I could make you a pillar if you need it for some of the moves."

	He said, "Yes, it would be helpful," he said, savoring every drop of the tea as best 
he could, and making himself gaze into her eyes instead of her...other body parts.  They 
weren't pits of evil or even of raging lust like he expected.  Instead, he found some 
amusement and kindness and a definite lack of destroying hellfires.  
	
	She rose into the air and concentrated.  The ground shook and a fair duplicate of 
his pillar arose at the very edge of the beach.  "Whenever you're ready to start tempting 
me," she said, "I'm ready."

	"I will show you the power of my holiness!" he proclaimed.  "Once I finish my 
tea."

	"Right," she said, sipping her tea.  "I expect a pretty impressive temptation, given 
your years of experience, you know."

	"Right.  I'll have to show you the Four Pillars, then."  He finished his tea and 
scrambled up the pillar, carefully not thinking about the stories which claimed you'd fall 
under the spell of any temptress of the Unicorn if you accepted food or drink from her.  

	The Four Pillars was developed by the somewhat eccentric Saint Archibald, who 
liked to preach while he practiced the Way of the Hammer (so named because it taught 
one to hit like a hammer).  Carefully shifting his brain and nervous system, he began to 
flow through the intricate pattern of kicks, punches, elbow strikes, knee gouges, blows to 
imaginary balls, leaps, spins, flips and multi-limb attacks, while reciting a four part 
sermon on the four pillars of the Stylites:  faith, asceticism, discipline, and generosity.  

	At the end, the temptress of the Unicorn applauded.  "Very well done!  I don't 
think I've ever felt so tempted to rip off a priest's clothing and have my way with him in 
my life!"

	Davros blushed.  "It's supposed to inspire you with a hunger for holiness!"

	"I'm certainly wanting something holy," she said, winking.  "Oh, my name is 
Mitsune, by the way."

	He racked his memory of holy works, but he couldn't think of any demons of the 
Unicorn named Mitsune.   "I'd better head home and get some sleep," he said, yawning.  
"Thank you for the tea and the temptation."

	She grinned.  "I'll bring some more temptation with me tomorrow."

	"I'll be looking forward to it."  Finally, a chance to resist some real temptation, he 
thought.  He hadn't done half badly, either.  Though he'd have to do some extra prayers to 
throw off the effects of the tea she'd lured him into drinking.  

	The Logrus took him home, and he quickly fell asleep.

******************

	"Running away with Motoko tomorrow?" Romar asked Narya.

	"Yes," he said absently, as he tried to cram his shirts into the suitcase.

	"Son, when no one is supposed to know you're doing something, you're not 
supposed to tell the truth," Romar said, lightning his pipe.

	"I've still got to fit my pants in here," Narya said with horror.

	"Also, leaving the palace with suitcases is probably going to make people wonder 
what sort of trip you're going on," Romar observed.

	"Where did all this clothing come from?  I never have anything clean to wear, and 
yet suddenly, I have all this clothing!" Narya said more frantically.  "And my shovel will 
never fit!"

	Romar puffed a smoke ring into the air, then puffed a steady stream of smoke like 
a not very firey flamethrower through the middle of it, then said, "Look, tentacular beasts 
are coming through the wall to eat us all."

	"Where's my copy of _The Prophecies of the Unicorn_?  And I can't find my 
silver unicorn necklace either!"  Narya pulled up the mattress on his bed and looked 
under it.  "How did eight issues of _Practical Gardening_ get under my mattress? "

	Romar took another puff, then walked over and yanked the necklace Narya was 
wearing, which was a silver chain with a silver unicorn pendant.  "Here it is," he said.

	Narya started.  "Father, what are you doing here?"

	"Narya, this is your mother and I's bedroom."

	"..."

	"You and Motoko won't get very far if you both act like this."

	"I'm not going anywhere!  We're not running away together or anything!"

	Romar laughed, and puffed another smoke ring.  "Son, I'm not here to stop you.  
It's my duty as your father to warn you that young love often doesn't last, but I like 
Motoko, and I have no objections if you two take a little trip, as long as you stop acting 
like an idiot."

	"I'm not an idiot!" Narya said irritably.  "And you can't stop me!"

	Romar sighed.  "Narya, have you shapeshifted your ears shut again?"

	"No, I...oh, wait, you said you didn't mind."

	"Now, do you want to get out of here successfully, or do you want to leave a trail 
so large that even Jacqui could track you down successfully?"

	"We have to get out without Nanami or Keiko catching us."

	He nodded.  "Now, this is what we have to do..."


******************

	The heavens poured down rain on the city of Drakala.  Water dripped off thatch 
and tile roofs, and everyone huddled inside.  At the front gates of the palace, Belak and 
Thira, two bored out of their mind guards, huddled under a tiny awning and cursed their 
bad luck.  "We could make out to stay warm," Belak suggested.

	"Kiss my ass," Thira replied, as usual.  They'd been down this road before.

	Two horses, one a dun palfrey, the other a white stallion, rode up to the front 
gates.  A tall woman in red rode upon the dun palfrey, while a shorter, more muscular 
woman with long pink hair rode the white stallion.  Both wore dark blue fezzes with 
several elven runes on them.  

	The guards stared.  Belak said, "Hey, didn't you get drunk and tear down the 
Green Dragon Inn last year?" to the pink haired woman.

	She looked embarrassed.  "It was a victory celebration."

	The tall woman said, "We have come to see the King, having heard of the rising 
of the Dread Beast in the mountains to the east."

	Thira shuddered.  "It destroyed three dwarf holds and depopulated the entire city 
of Rillisti!"

	"They say it makes men impotent!" Belak said in horror.  

	"Anyway, the army the King sent got destroyed, so he's busy fondling his 
concubines instead of marching forth to battle," Thira said in disgust.

	"We will see about that," the tall woman said.

	"Punk ass bitch needs an ass whooping," the pink haired woman said.

	The tall woman stared at her.

	"We will convince him to reform his ways," the pink haired woman said.  
"Through our superior moral force."

	"Much better."

	King Ota the Horny was getting jiggy with his court bard, a fetching green haired 
lass, when the two women barged in through the door.  He said, "Take a number, we're 
not done yet."

	"King Ota, you must take up your sword Justice, and join us to ride forth against 
the Dread Beast," the tall woman said.

	"Also, your foreplay technique needs a LOT of work," the pink haired woman 
said.  "You're not even using your tongue."

	"Isillome, we were not sent by the Valar to be sex counsellors," the tall woman 
said.

	"We should have been, Melokewen  This sort of thing would never be tolerated 
back in Valinor," Isillome said.  

	Both of the Witches, King Ota thought.  Why couldn't I just get the horny pink-
haired one again?  I bet I could get her into bed THIS time.  "No mortal man can stand 
against the Dread Beast!  I might as well just make sure it kills me after a good lay."

	"No real woman wants to sleep with a coward," Melokewen said.

	"What about you and Esteldil, hmm?" Isillome asked.

	"Don't undercut my rhetoric!"

	"Oh, right."

	Ota said, "Hmm, here's a deal.  Have sex with me, both of you at once, and I'll do 
it."

	"Here's a deal," Melokewen said.  "Get off your lazy ass and fight for your 
kingdom, and I won't burn you to a small pile of ash."

	"We aren't supposed to burn the mortals to death if they won't do what we want, 
Melokewen."

	Melokewen grumbled to herself.

	"Well, if you'd rather it be known that you sat in your castle masturbating while 
two women went and saved your kingdom because you were too much of a pansy to do 
so..." Isillome began.

	"I am not a pansy!" he shouted.

	"Then are you going to come fight the Dread Beast or what?"

	He leaped to his feet.  "Dammit, let's go!"

	"Get dressed first," Melokewen said.  "We will be waiting in the throne room."

	The woman finally spoke, saying, "Can we finish first?"

	"Hmm, should only delay us maybe two minutes," Isillome said.  "Sure."

	"I'll show you two minutes!!!!!"  Ota shouted.

	As they left, Melokewen said, "More like thirty seconds."

	"I was trying to not be insulting," Isillome replied.

	
******************

	Mona walked into the photo lab.  "You Tomoyo?" she asked the dark haired 
woman on the other side of the counter.

	"Yes, I am," she said, smiling pleasantly.  "Are you here to pick up some photos, 
to try out for the porno movies we film in the back room, to buy some of our pornos, or to 
buy some costumes?"  She looked thoughtful.  "Oh, you're the woman we taped for 
Vinnie down at Motel 6!"

	"..."  Mona tried to say something threatening, but just couldn't manage it in the 
face of so much cheerfulness.

	Another woman came out of the backroom, dressed in an outfit that pretty much 
screamed 'Little Red Riding Hood', except for the long staff she also carried.  "This hood 
hampers my peripheral vision, Tomoyo-chan," she said.  "Oh, a customer."

	Tomoyo reached under the counter and pulled out a DVD case, which she passed 
over to Mona .  "Here's your copy.  I added a commentary track, with some suggestions 
on improving your technique.  It also has some clothing designs I think you'll find useful 
for your future sex games with your boyfriend, although you may have to tweak them, as 
I had to estimate your measurements."  She turned to the other woman.  "But it's so cute, 
Sakura!"

	"You...commentary track..."  Smoke poured out of Mona 's ears.
	
	"Anyway, let me know if you like the opening logo, as I can redesign if I need to.  
Also, for the cast listing, should I spell your name as 'Shady', 'Mona ' or 'Ooooh, Baby!'?"

	"Mona Shade," she said weakly.

	Sakura's eyes widened.  "You're Mona Shade, the Sexy Monster Slayer?"

	"Uh huh."

	"You didn't tell me we had footage of her!" Sakura said to Tomoyo.

	"Well, I was going to save it until we finalized everything, in case we filmed more 
footage or had to cut some stuff," Tomoyo said.  "Oh yes..."  She slid a piece of paper 
over to Mona .  "Sign this receipt, please."

	Mona signed it, then staggered out of the store, down to her Corvette.  David was 
sitting inside, reading Aquinas with an eye in his right hand and keeping watch for 
trouble with his normal eyes.  He shifted away the hand-eye, then asked, "Sounded like 
you got it without a fight."

	"Brain hurts," Mona said.  "We need to switch hotels, then you need to fuck my 
brains out."

	"You can't survive without a brain, dear," he said.  "You see, the brain maintains 
the..."

	"I don't need a biology lecture," she said, revving the engine.  "Oh, and we need 
to find some place to rent a DVD player."

	"Why?"

	"Gotta see if the advice is any good."

	"..."
	
******************

	Thoric sat in his room and tried to calm himself by playing his violin.  I will not 
fantasize about what I saw, he told himself.  That way leads to more beatings.  Nothing 
but nice, soothing music.

	Then he realized he was trying to play 'I want your sex' on a violin and sighed.  
He got out a piece he hadn't learned yet, and forced himself to practice it.

	Then there was a knock on the door.  "Come in if you're not here to turn me into a 
doll or beat me up or set my bed on fire," he said.

	Mitsune came in, shirt hastily buttoned.  So hastily buttoned that it was, in fact, 
inside out.  "Thoric, you have to come with me."

	"Did Jacqui and Suu set the east wing on fire again?"

	"No, no," Mitsune said, tugging on his arm.  "You've got to hurry."

	"Uh, okay," he said.  "I promise I didn't see anything earlier, and I won't tell 
anyone about what I didn't see."

	She walked down the hallway with him.  "I know you won't," she said.  

	"So where are we going?"

	"The baths," she said.

	"..."

	"Worried about getting beaten up?"

	"I once tried cleaning the baths at 3 AM on the belief they would be empty.  Naru 
and Motoko were BOTH in there," he said, sounding frustrated.  "Yet, they said nothing 
until it was too late."

	"Well, the wards we put up should mean we get some privacy," she replied.

	"P...privacy?"

	"For you and me and Motoko."

	"..."

	"We wanted to apologize for earlier, so we're going to bathe you," she said.

	"Bathe me," he said weakly.

	"Do you not want us to?" Mitsune asked.

	"Yes, I want to, I've been having fantasies about both of you ever since I..."  He 
slapped himself.  "I didn't mean to say that."

	She slid the doors of the bath open.  "But it's what I wanted to hear."

	The doors slid shut behind them, and the wards kicked into operation.    

	And across the Hina Inn, an alarm pinged loudly, drawing attention to itself...

******************

	The backstreets of Begma City are never pleasant, especially not on a foggy night 
when the air stinks of hairspray and the hideous cacophany of N'stink and the Rearentry 
Boys fills the air from a dozen temples of ill-repute.  As Shady drove down the street, 
they could see the neon sign in front of the run-down shrine they sought:  'Pimpin' Pooh's 
House of Esoteric Taoism'.  A smaller sign said, 'Yes, we accept honey in payment for 
our honies'.  

	"She's working FOR PIMPIN' POOH?" Stalag Shiz asked in horror.

	"At least she ain't working for Yummi," Shady said.

	"Hey, don't go talking bad about my mom!  She's got _class_," Foxy said.  "When 
she goes down on a  man, he stays down."

	Shady laughed.  Stalag Shiz said, "Alright, we go in, we get my wife, and if we 
see Pimpin' Pooh, we turn him into heffalump chow."

	Shady said, "We'd better get the guns out of the trunk, then."

	She and Foxy armed up, while Stalag Shiz made sure his Mac-10s were loaded 
and he got more clips for them.

	They strode into the temple; a worship ceremony was in progress, in which many 
men gave up offerings of ones, fives, tens, and twenties to a pair of dancing goddesses 
upon a dais.  For those who thirsted for something other than holiness, there was a bar 
with a bored looking bartender.  Yen-Yang signs were plastered everywhere; the two 
dancing goddesses were pretty much only clad in such by now.

	One of them froze up and stared over at the trio who had just entered.  "Shiz?" she 
asked weakly.

	Half the men turned and stared at him.

	"Rimururu, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?" he shouted.  "We're 
married, you know!"

	"Nako-chan said you'd divorced me and become a prison gigolo!" she shouted 
back.

	The other woman laughed nervously, and began to edge towards the side of the 
dais.

	"..."

	Foxy began to laugh hysterically.  Shady chortled.

	"I ain't no FREAK!" Stalag Shiz shouted.  "Just because I like to carry an 
umbrella doesn't make me gay!"

	"Hey, gay guys make pretty good lovers if you don't mind shifting into a man for 
them," Foxy said, a little offended.  "They know what tongues are for."

	"Nakoruru, YOU BITCH!" Stalag Shiz shouted.  "You done corrupted my 
woman!  DIE!  DIE!  DIE!"  He opened fire on Nakoruru, the other dancer.  She tumbled, 
plucking up a set of robes which she tossed on, and pulling out several short blades she 
used to parry the bullets.

	"Piglet, get Pooh!" she shouted.  

	A pig-man took off for the stairs up.  Shady took off after him, blazing away at 
him, but he proved very good at dodging bullets.  Meanwhile, Foxy began shooting up 
the bar, mostly out of a sense of tradition.  The bartender ignored her, except for getting a 
broom and beginning to sweep up the glass.

	Rimururu ran towards Stalag Shiz, who decided not to kill her on the spot, since it 
was all Nakoruru's fault, as usual.  "We need some ice, baby," he said.

	She slid her left hand into his pants.

	"Not an ice rod, baby, I need you to freeze up the room."

	"Sorry, force of habit."  She turned and froze up the stairs, causing Piglet to 
tumble back down them.  

Shady grabbed him by his ears.  "You're not going anywhere."

"Leggo!  I'll show you where the honey is hidden!"

In the distance, they could hear the wail of police sirens.  "Shit, the cops are 
coming!" Stalag Shiz said.  "We'll have to kill Nakoruru and Pimpin' Pooh later."

"I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE, MOONIE!" the voice of Keiko bellowed through 
the walls.  "YOU'RE NOT GETTING AWAY FROM ME THIS TIME."

	Shady twitched.  "Don't call me MOONIE, you FUGLY BITCH!"

	"Out the back door," Stalag Shiz shouted.  They ran through the panicked mob of 
worshippers towards the back door as Ramon crashed through the front doors of the 
place, a shotgun in each hand.  Behind him was Keiko, with a very large rocket launcher.  

	They dove through the doors into the storage room even as the front of the temple 
exploded in flames.  Shady tossed Piglet to one side and charged the back door, which 
crashed open.  "Now we've got to circle around to our car," Shiz said.

	They followed his lead around the now burning building, hearing Ramon and 
Keiko shouting before them.  As they came back around to the front, they could see City 
of Begma police pouring into the building.  Unfortunately, their car had a yellow bear 
hovering cross-legged over it, a jar of honey floating in the air before him.  He wore a 
bright red pimp hat with feather, a plaid jacket, plaid pants, and boots with aquarium 
soles.  A tiger-like being balanced on its very long tail next to him, as he drew a character 
on its forehead with honey, using his silver headed pimp-cane as a writing instrument.  It 
was Pimpin' Pooh, the Horny Sage.

	"I can't let you take one of my best 'hos, Stalag Shiz," Pimpin' Pooh said.

	"She's my wife!  Now get away from our car!"

	Rimururu said, "I'm sorry, Pooh, but I just found out we're still married!"

	"Marriage interferes with the Quest for Enlightenment.  We must live like beasts 
do, answering the call of our bellies, and rutting like goats, if we are to find true wisdom 
and power," Pooh said, patting his big belly.  "Have you not touched the powers of the 
cosmos as three men took you at once, Bust Rimururu?"

	"Yes!  Ooooh, yes," she moaned, then froze up.  "But I'm married.  Even if it 
means I don't find enlightenment, I'm going home with my husband."

	"Look, I don't give a damn about enlightenment, but you're dripping honey on my 
car!" Foxy said.  "Stealing that wasn't easy!"

	Pooh's voice was hypnotic.  "The Tao which can be tasted cannot be understood.  
If you hear the wind, is it not smelly?  A full belly and an engorged manhood, is that not 
wisdom?  Abandon these other things which..."

	Then the rocket launcher fired and blew up the car, flinging Pimpin' Pooh and 
Tigger into the front wall of 'OK Charlie's Dog-Breeding Emporium' across the street.  
Keiko shouted, "HAH!  TAKE THAT!"

	Fires glowed in Foxy's eyes.  "MY CAR!"  Her hands crackled with lightning.  
"DIE!"  She unleashed billions of volts at Keiko and Ramon.  Keiko fell down gibbering, 
but Ramon began to stride through the lightning, looking pained but relentless.

	Shady said, "Good thing I remember how to hotwire a car.  Everyone into the City 
of Amber Police Cruiser!"

	Rimururu hopped into the backseat of the car.  Shady got in and started hotwiring.  
Shiz picked up Foxy and dragged her over as she continued to emit electricity and 
scream.  

	Ramon said, "Hey, you're stealing OUR CAR!"

	Once Shiz got Foxy inside, Shady hit the gas, and they took off running.  

	
******************

	Days turned into weeks of spiritual struggle.  The Unicorn's servant, Mitsune, 
brought forth such potent weapons of spiritual corruption as tea, cookies, ham and cheese 
sandwiches, dresses which revealed just enough of her body to make him want to see the 
rest of it, and half-baked theological arguments which wouldn't fool even an initiate of 
the Stylite order.  Of course, she was just an initiate herself, apparently.  So he carefully 
worked with her on her theology; after all, an easily resisted temptation was hardly worth 
resisting.  After a while, they'd begun practicing unarmed combat together; it was ever so 
much easier if you actually had a real opponent.  They usually did this when he made his 
visits to her pit of pleasant beach-side Unicorn evil.  She kept trying to get him to go 
swimming afterwards, but that was clearly yet another temptation to be resisted, although 
part of his brain kept arguing that seeing her in a bikini would give him a chance to 
demonstrate his spiritual strength by resisting the sight of her nearly naked body, just as 
daily hand to hand combat let him fight his instinct to embrace her rather to toss and 
throw her.

	He could tell he was winning her over to the side of the light.  That would be a 
story for the legends.  Even Saint Markos, who once converted an anvil to worship the 
Serpent, had never actually managed to convince a demoness of the Unicorn to repent 
and join the true faith!  But he was definitely making a break through, he was sure.  
Certainly, a truly entrenched in evil demoness couldn't laugh so pleasantly and smile so 
brightly or feel so good to touch at the end of a long workout.  

	And then one day she didn't come.  He waited, and waited, and waited and waited, 
and there was no sign of her.    He could hardly sleep that night.  Was it over?  Had he 
she given up in defeat?  They'd been planning to try to thrash through Saint Willefer's 
commentaries on Saint Millifi's commentaries on the Annotated Book of the Serpent of 
Flame.  That would give them enough room for heated spiritual debate for weeks.  
Perhaps she had known its arguments were irrefutable and was hiding in shame.  But he 
didn't think she'd ever give up so easily.  She'd been trying for months to get him to spar 
with her with his top off so she could see his muscles better.  Every day she asked.  She 
even offered to take hers off too, just to be fair.  But he couldn't be tricked THAT easily. 

	The next day, he quickly traversed shadow with the help of the Logrus, finding 
himself at her house.  It seemed the same as ever.  He knocked on the door, but no one 
answered.  He frowned, not wanting to barge in, but worried that something had 
happened.  I shouldn't be worried about this, he thought.  Demonesses deserve whatever 
might happen to them!  

	But he couldn't think of her like that.  Perhaps her evil relatives had learned she 
was about to come over to the Serpent and hauled her off to torment her for succumbing 
to the Serpent's blandishments.  He frowned at the thought.  No one was going to do that 
to his temptress if he had anything to say about it.  He called upon the Logrus and tried to 
seek her in shadow.  It simply pointed through the door.  He knocked again, but still no 
answer.  

	He opened the door.  "Serpent's Blessing on this House and All that Dwell 
Within!" he shouted.  "Are you there, Mitsune?"

	No hideous beasts assailed him, though the smell of the dirty laundry stacked in 
the living room in rough piles was almost as bad.  For some values of bad.  He pressed 
onwards, shouting, "Mitsune, are you there?"

	Finally, he heard a mumbled reply through a door and knocked on it; it swung 
open, revealing a bedroom.  Looking flushed and miserable, Mitsune lay on top of the 
sheets, sweating profusely, wearing only a red shirt that went down to just below her butt.  
She said weakly, "I haven't been this hideously ill in ages.  I didn't even think I COULD 
get sick."

	He came over and put his hand on her forehead.  "You're burning up," he said.

	"Duh."

	"Still, not too hard to cure."

	"I can't think straight enough to cast spells," she mumbled.  "Or I'd have cured 
myself."

	He went and got her some water, then sat down for the three hours it would take 
to weave the spell together, while she babbled about people he didn't know and drank 
water like it was going out of style.  Finally, he finished the spell, then cast it on her.  He 
could see the redness of her skin quickly fade to its usual color, and she stopped 
sweating.  "Ugh," she said.  "I feel like I got whacked upside the head."

	She sat up.  "Thank you, Davros."

	"You're welcome," he said.  "You're going to need to rest for a few days after this, 
and get your strength back."  He started to stand up.

	"Don't go," she said softly.  "I can't tempt you much like this, but..."

	If I stay, I can work on her while she's vul...while she's open to my preaching, he 
thought.  "Alright.  I'll stay."

	She smiled.  "Thank you," she said, staggering to her feet.  "I'll get us some food."

	"Rest," he said.  "I'll make us some food."

	The next few days were very pleasant in ways he had forgotten were part of 
normal life.  He hadn't puttered about a house doing nothing since he'd gone to his 
mother's funeral thirty years earlier.  They'd laid about the house, sipped tea, argued 
theology, and done some holy reading together.  It was all very peaceful and calm, 
though he worried that he was succumbing to the subtle temptation to just stay.  After all, 
he had another pillar right here, and what was the point of them making that long 
commute?  Plus, if he stayed, he would have more time to spend with her...proselytizing 
her.  But he couldn't just ask to stay.  Not in a very nice house...hellpit.  Hellpit.  He had 
to remind himself of that.  

	One evening, she came back from putting away the dishes and sat down in his lap.  
He was about to protest when he realized this was a chance to resist temptation, and 
therefore, he shouldn't fight it, just avoid giving in to the temptation to go further, like  
kissing her soft lips.  "Davros, you've been a lot of help to me," she said softly.  "Even 
though I'm an evil temptress of the Unicorn."

	"My vows require me to help everyone, even evil temptresses of the Unicorn."  
He told himself that he wasn't saying 'evil temptresses of the Unicorn' with the same sort 
of tone of voice one might use for 'lovely woman you find very attractive' or 'girlfriend'.  
"I'm sure with a little more effort, I'll tempt you to come over to follow the Serpent."  He 
told himself he wasn't enjoying the tingling feeling he got as she ran one of her hands up 
and down his arm.

	"Hmm, well, it would be a lot easier if we didn't have to make that long trip every 
day," she said.  "You could just move onto the workout pillar here."

	"Alright," he said.  "But don't think this means I'm giving in to your temptations 
or anything."

	"Oh, of course not," she said, then laughed.  "Oh, Davros, you're one of the most 
unique priests I've ever met."

	"Is that good or bad?" he asked.

	"I've been celibate for longer than I've ever been since I lost my virginity, hanging 
around out here in the wilderness with you.  No other priest ever got me to do that."

	"You said I was the first priest you ever tempted," he said, feeling a little hurt she 
hadn't told him about the others.  

	"Oh, I wasn't trying to tempt them.  And they were all Unicorn priests."

	"The Unicorn has priests?" he asked.

	She laughed.  "Davros, sometimes you are the most incredibly intelligent man I 
have ever known.  And then you say something that shows how sweetly naive you are."

	"Well, I suppose the Unicorn would have evil priests."

	"Davros," she said softly.  "Do you really think I'm evil?"

	He ought to say yes, he knew.  But looking into her eyes, he couldn't say it.  
Couldn't believe it.  She was flirtatious, and wild, and naughty and out of control.  She 
was more of a Chaosian than he was.  But evil?  No.  Whatever the Stylite texts said 
about temptresses of the Unicorn, he couldn't believe she was evil.  "No," he said softly.  
"You tempt me to my very limits, but you are not evil.  You...you are a good person," he 
said.  "And I like being with you, and I like doing things with you, and even though you 
really, really need to do laundry more often, this isn't a hellpit.  It's just a house."  He felt 
like his mind was snapping in two.  "Mitsune, why did you keep coming back?  After all 
the things I've said?"

	"Well, at first, I just wanted to get you naked and in my arms," she said.  
"Because you were pretty damn hot.  And I thought that if I could score with you...well, 
sometimes I see something, and I want it, and I'll go to the ends of the Earth to get it.  But 
then, I just..."  She gently rumpled his hair.  "I enjoy playing our little game, and 
you...you make me feel holier for doing it.  And I like you, and I like being with you, and 
I like doing things with you.  And I'd like to strip you naked and let you have your way 
with me."

	"I'm not supposed to give in to that sort of temptation," he said.

	"Which is, of course, why you've let me sit in your lap the last three days in a row 
without saying anything," she replied, sounding a little amused.

	"One must expose oneself to temptation in order to gain the power to resist it, 
Saint Camargue said," Davros said, making no effort whatsoever to eject her from his lap.

	"So, if I was to strip you naked, then wiggle all over you, that would be a chance 
to build your ability to resist temptation?" she asked.

	He started to say yes, then said, "I don't think I could resist that temptation."

	"But you want to be tempted like that?"

	"Yes."

	One of her hands slid down to his waist.  "I think we're ready to progress to a new 
level of temptation."

	"Like the spaghetti we had today."

	"Yes."

	"Which I certainly didn't revel in every delightful bite of.  Nor did I crave more of 
it once I was done.  As that would have been yielding to temptation."

	"Exactly," she said, pulling off his belt.  "And you're certainly not going to yield 
to temptation and enjoy what we're about to do."

	"I think we'll need to try it several times, so I can resist the temptation to enjoy it 
in many different ways," he said, then paused.  "I'm rationalizing."  He could feel the 
entire mental apparatus he'd built up in his head to justify what he was doing to himself 
collapsing in the face of rising desire.  If this wasn't against what he was supposed to be 
doing, then nothing was.  

	"I'm happy to help you rationalize if we need to," she said. 

	He shook his head.  "I shouldn't do this because of deluding myself that this is an 
exercise in holiness."

	She sighed.  "So you don't want to?"

	"I'm only holding myself back from ripping your clothing off by sheer force of 
will."  He wanted her, utterly and completely.  He'd been terrified when he'd seen her 
lying there ill, terrified when she simply hadn't shown up.  She was part of his life now, 
and he wanted her to stay in it.  

	"With the right spell, you could rip my clothing off by sheer force of will," she 
teased.

	"We should pray together," he said.  "I need...I need guidance."

	She laughed.  "Of all the men I ever came on to, you're the only one who decided 
to pray before saying yes."

	He tried to stand and failed.  "We can't pray like this."

	"Well, we could, but..."  She got up and kneeled down next to him. 

	"Oh great serpent," he prayed.  "I do not understand what I should do.   I cannot 
believe my...my lo...my love for Mitsune is unholy, yet my oaths forbid us to join in 
union.  What should we do?"

	DAMMIT, GET IT ON ALREADY!  ARE YOU A BIG TEASE OR WHAT? 

	They could hear the voice echoing hollowly in their minds.  Davros started.  
"What?"

	EITHER RIP OFF HER CLOTHING, OR GO BACK TO YOUR PILLAR AND 
LOSE HER FOREVER!  NOW, I, THE GREAT SERPENT KUNDALI, COMMAND 
YOU TWO TO GET IT ON RIGHT NOW, RIGHT HERE!  

	There was a pause. 

	ACTUALLY, GO TO THE BEDROOM.  THOSE LAUNDRY FUMES ARE 
MAKING MY BRAIN HURT.

	Davros rose and picked up Mitsune, "We hear and obey, oh mighty Serpent!"

	Mitsune said, "Damn, I'd have let you convert me already if I realized the Serpent 
was that cool."

	She paused.

	"You know, the Serpent sounds suspiciously like Uncle Morgy..."

	I AM MOST CERTAINLY NOT MORGENSTERN!  NOPE!  NOW GET IT 
ON!

	"Yes, sir," Davros said.  

	They got it on, and then the world shattered...

*****************
	
	Four bodies writhed in unison, in reality and in private little mindscapes.  

	Then all the mindscapes exploded at once...

*****************
	
	Davros, Motoko, and Moonshade laid stunned and confused, a tangle of naked 
limbs on the bed.  Moonshade came out of it first, hearing her armband on the floor 
talking.  "Yo, Moonshade, did that get your attention?"

	"Uncle Morgy, did you just call all the way from another universe when I was in 
the middle of having sex, for no good reason at all again?" she asked.

	"Uhh...yeah."

	"Uncle Morgy!!!!"

	"I take it those Logrus tendrils weren't actually trying to kill you all, then."

	"No!"

	Davros sat up.  "Ugh."

	"So throwing Patternflame at them was bad?"

	"Yes!"

	"I guess this wouldn't be a good time to ask if you can recommend any good punk 
ska bands, then."  Morgenstern asked nervously.

	Davros said, "What is going on?"

	"I don't even know what 'punk ska' IS.  Can't you just find one with Pattern?"

	"Yeah, but Jacqui's Pattern has no taste in music.  There's freaking ABBA in this 
universe.  It could have been ABBA-free, but nooooo...."

	"Uncle Morgy, go watch your Summer Rites tapes again."

	"Oooh, good idea."

	Motoko snapped back to consciousness.  "You DO have tapes!"

	"Pay Per Trump, so I taped it."  There was a pause.  "I didn't really say that."

	"MORGENSTERN!"

	"I'll just be ambling on," Morgenstern said, and the manifestation went dead.

	Davros said, "In the future, his manifestation needs to stay OUT of bedrooms in 
use."

	"I know," Moonshade said, then took his left hand and brought it up to her right 
breast.  "I think I remember what we were doing."

	Motoko says, "Not quite."  She moved Davros' hand round to Moonshade's left 
breast, then twined serpentinely around him, sliding one of her hands down to his groin 
while her head advanced to let her kiss Moonshade's right breast.  "Like this, I think.  
Honey, get the Logrus tendrils back up while we get to work."

	"Yes, dear."

	But you've had enough porn for one night, or else you don't want any, so let's be 
moving along...

******************

	Much later, Deirdre woke up and went downstairs to get breakfast.  No one else 
was up.  She asked Ilimi, the three-armed cook, "Where's everyone?"

	"Still in bed, Deirdre.  Would you like some pancakes today?"

	She nodded.  "That would be great."

	The door opened, and Rimururu walked in.  "Good morning, Deirdre," she said.

	"Hi, Grandma Rimururururu."

	"That's Rimururu."

	"Okay!" Deirdre said.  "You want some pancakes?"

	"I already had breakfast.  Is Motoko up?"

	"She's upstairs," Deirdre said.

	"Not out of bed yet?" Rimururu asked disapprovingly.

	"We had a birthday party for me and Miroku.  Thank you for sending me the 
kimonos and the little white boat!"

	She smiled.  "You're welcome.  Did Miroku like his presents?"

	"I think so."  She paused.  "He and Akari had a fight, so we had to go to 
Dworkinland without them."

	"Did you have fun?"

	"I got to ride a tank through Queen Katie's Funland!"

	Rimururu very carefully said, "That's nice."

	"We had to find Mommy and Daddy when they got lost."

	"I see."

	"And I met another Deirdre.  She fell in the Abyss and died, but she got better."

	"I see."

	"And I had a nice juicy steak with lots of ketchup!"

	Rimururu made a face.  "With ketchup?"

	"Everything goes better with ketchup.  Except ice cream."  She reached over and 
took Rimururu's hand for a  moment.  Conspiratorily, she said, "It's really nasty with ice 
cream."  Then she let go.

	"I would imagine so," Rimururu said, smiling slightly.

	The cook came out and said, "Has someone gone upstairs to get you the 
Ambassador, Lady Rimururu?"

	"I sent Lucas upstairs."

	"You're a cruel woman, Lady Rimururu."

	"People who tell me to show up at a given time, then aren't ready deserve what 
they get," she replied.  

	"I suppose so."

*****************

	Lucas pounded on the door, to no reply.  "Lady Rimururu is here!" he shouted for 
the eighth time.

	Miroku opened the door.  "Grandma is here?" he asked, yawning and rubbing his 
eyes.

	"You're not the Ambassador," Lucas said.  He was a tall, somewhat homely man, 
solidly built and a bit thick in the head, but good natured.  "Where's the Ambassador?"

	Miroku said frantically, "I didn't do anything to the Ambassador!  It's not my 
fault!"

	Lucas frowned.  "Is this one of your little tricks, Miroku?"

	"I didn't do nothin'!  I've been asleep since Daddy tucked me in!  Well, I did have 
to go bathroom one time, but I didn't flush any frogs or anything!"

	"Uh huh," he said.  "Where did you put the Ambassador?"

	"I didn't put the Ambassador anywhere!" Miroku protested.  "Akari must have 
stolen the Ambassador!"

	"And where's Akari?" he asked.

	"Dunno."  He shrugged.  "Her room?"

	Lucas looked up and down the hallway, and saw a door with Akari's name on it.  
He went and banged on the door.  "Come out with your hands up!  I know you've got the 
Ambassador in there!"

	Mitsune opened the door and stuck her head out.  "Huh?  Lucas, aren't you 
supposed to be guarding the door?"

	"Lady Rimururu is here to see the Ambassador."

	"Oh, bloody hell," Mitsune mumbled.  "Miroku, honey, take Lucas downstairs 
and tell Lady Rimururu that we'll be down in a few minutes?"

	"Okay!"  He took Lucas by the hand.  "Don't worry, Mommy will save the 
Ambassador from Akari."

	Mitsune turned to Akari, who was waking up.  "Get dressed, honey.  Grandma is 
here."

	"Yay!" Akari leaped out of bed and ran to her closet.

	Mitsune ambled down the hallway, stretching.  This is just going to be the 
morning from hell, she thought.

	She muttered a few words of power and slipped past the wards on Motoko's door 
to get it to let her in.  Inside, she found Motoko lying on her back, with an arm each 
around Davros and Moonshade, who lay on their sides facing each other and her.  The 
sheets were pulled up to their waists leaving their torsos bare.  

	For just a moment, she felt a wave of jealousy that she'd been stuck with Akari 
while they'd been snuggled up to each other, though they'd done their best to include her.  
And then it passed, driven away by a combination of knowing they'd wanted her to join 
them and that she didn't have time for jealousy until after they dealt with the Rimururu 
drive-by.

	She tiptoed over, then leaned down, and gently kissed each of them as best she 
could.  They didn't wake up, so she went over to the wall and pulled two bokkens off a 
stand, then clapped them together as hard as she could, while shouting, "Help!  Taylors 
have invaded the embassy and are trying to eat our children!"

	Moonshade was up and out the door in two seconds, running butt naked into the 
hallway, grabbing the bokkens from Mitsune as she went by.  Davros rolled onto his back 
and said, "What?"

	Motoko yawned and sat up.  "I thought I killed them all."

	In the distance, they heard Lucas shout, "Ahh!  You're naked!"

	Mitsune winced.  "I just wanted to wake you all up."

	Motoko said, "Have we overslept?"

	"Rimururu is here," Mitsune said.

	Motoko frowned.  "Delightful.  I should have remembered that."

	She rose and began to get dressed.  "Mitsune, can you go and keep her busy until 
we're all ready?"

	"Ready to throw myself on the grenade, captain," Mitsune said.  She wiggled her 
fingers and her nightshirt turned into a very proper kimono, and her hair grew longer then 
did itself up in a fancy bun.  "I am the very soul of grace, elegance, and politeness."

	Once she departed, Davros said, "I will see about making sure the children are 
ready to go, as I expect you and Mitsune will be busy with Rimururu until then."

	Motoko nodded.  "Thank you."

	He quickly slipped into his robes, saying, "It was a very interesting dream, my 
love."

	"It can be tempting to prefer dreams to reality," she said, then held up two 
blouses.  "Pearl or Teal?"

	"Pearl," he said.

	She put it on, then selected a matching skirt.  "Hmm, too short?" she asked.

	"I think you should wear the mini-skirt and the leather jacket, and leave your 
blouse half unbuttoned," he said.

	"..."

	"If we are to be thought wicked, we might as well be wicked," he said, sighing.

	She frowned.  "What's wrong, Davros?"

	"There are few things worse than the disapproval of an old friend," he said.

	Nodding, she turned and fumbled through the skirts.  "I know," she said.  "I 
cannot blame Rimururu for not understanding our family."

	"Neither can I," he said.

	She pulled out two skirts, stared at them, and frowned.  "Mitsune would put on 
the mini-skirt and unbutton her blouse.  But I am the Ambassador, and I shouldn't visit 
the Black House dressed like that."

	"I know," he said, then walked over and put a hand on her shoulder.  "We could, 
however, suggest it to Mitsune."

	She turned and looked at him sternly, "Are you suggesting we strike by proxy?"

	"Yes."

	The sternness melted.  "I wish we could, but best we not drag down their opinion 
of Mitsune any further.  We will not sink to the level of their delusions.  This family is 
holy, blessed by the Serpent and the Unicorn.  We are faithful to each other, and we 
shower our children with all the love and care we can.  We are not wanton."

	"Except for each other."  He smiled in a way that reminded her of Mitsune.  

	"Exactly."  She flushed slightly as she put her arms around him.  "So that, for 
example, if we were to take this clothing back off, and make her wait a while, we would 
be doing our conjugal duties."

	"For as it says in the _Book of the Five Stars_, it is the wife's duty to cherish her 
husband, and the husband's duty to make sure she howls with delight in his arms, at the 
break of every day.  With love in their hearts, they can face any challenge together."

	They started to move towards the bed.  "Hmm, I think I need to read that book."

	"As soon as I finish writing it, you can," he said, smiling.

	"Have you been making up holy texts again to lure me down the path of 
naughtiness?" Motoko asked as she sat down on the bed, then laid back, pulling Davros 
on top of her.

	"In infinite shadow, every possible holy text exists, so I couldn't ever REALLY 
make it up."  He kissed her neck.  "Shall I come and dwell inside you, my love?"

	"Yes," she breathed, slipping off his belt with the ease of long practice.

	Moonshade stuck her head in.  "How professional do I need to look today?  Am I 
going for cool and efficient, am I supposed to be a holy warrior of Chaos or should I go 
for 'blatant warrior hussy barely restraining herself from ripping off her lover's clothing 
right now?'"  She paused.  "Normally, I'd climb on top of Davros right now, but you 
know, Rimururu is waiting for us downstairs."

	Motoko sighed.  "You're right.  I am being wanton."

	"Wanton is good," Moonshade said.  "But not when Grandma Holier-Than-Thou 
is waiting for us."

	"Rimururu is a good and holy woman," Motoko said.  "Who only wants what is 
best for her granddaughter."

	"She is a kind and gentle soul, and I regret she must be separated from her 
husband so often and so long for a crime he was tricked into committing."  Davros stared 
at the floor.  "We have to be understanding."

	"Well, I'll go be the barely restrained warrior hussy," Moonshade said.  "As my 
reputation can't get much worse with her.  She at least gives both of you some respect, 
and she tries to give Mitsune some slack for being Akari's mother.  So, I'll be the bad 
girl."

	"Isillome," Motoko said softly, "I'm sorry."

	"Ain't your fault.  Besides, I'll get to watch you two trying to hold yourselves back 
from staring at my chest the whole time.  And Uncle Shizumaru too.  Should be fun."  
She paused, mumbling 'Stalag Shiz', then laughed.  "We need to get a red convertable."

	"I don't get it," Davros said.

	"I'll explain later.  You two get _dressed_, not undressed."  And then she was 
gone.

	"Later, my love," Davros said, kissing her briefly on the lips, then standing up and 
recovering his belt.  "

	"You'd think, after what we did in the middle of the night, that we would be able 
to stop ourselves more easily."  She sounded faintly annoyed with herself as she got up 
and went to finish getting dressed.  

	"Spring is upon us, my love," he said, tying his yellow and red robes shut with his 
belt and slipping on his sandals.  "It is the season of love.  And our passion will only 
build as the rites grow closer.  You know how it was last year."

	"Trying to be celibate for a month before the rites is close to impossible," she 
said.  "We had to lock ourselves in our rooms every night that last week."

	"But it makes it all the sweeter when we do join in holy union with the Serpent," 
he replied.  "And a little abstinence can be good for the soul.  As well as making the 
pleasure sweeter when you finally enjoy it."

	She slid on a long skirt.  "Will you be longing for me to finish what we started all 
of today?"

	"Yes."

	"So will I," she said, then brushed her hands across her hair, which had grown out 
to shoulder length.  "Should I do something with this?"

	"I think it is fine."  He thought, then reached into shadow with the logrus, and 
plucked out a red rose.  "Here."  He twined it through her hair over one ear.  "Red rose 
for love."

	She took his hand.  "Time to go forth to battle, my love."

	"Together, we cannot lose," he said.

	"I certainly hope not."

****************  

	"You okay, Akari?" Miroku asked Akari.

	She looked up from her pancakes.  "I'm fine," she said.

	"Good," he said, then began pouring oodles of syrup on his pancakes.  "I love 
maple syrup," he said.

	"But would you marry it?" Akari asked.

	"Yes," Miroku said, then started cutting his pancakes into squares.

	"You're not supposed to say yes!" Akari replied.

	"No yelling at the dinner table," Mitsune said instinctively.

	"Sorry, Mommy," Akari said.

	"Breakfast should be a time of peace and contemplation as you prepare for the 
day," Rimururu said to Akari.  She glanced up at the ceiling.  "Some people seem to be 
very busy...contemplating."

	Moonshade came in the door, wearing tight leather black pants and a green 
bustier.  She had Sansacure slung on her back.  "Good morning, Rimururu-san," she said.  
"You eager to see your honey?"

	"Yes, I am," Rimururu said, blushing slightly.  "It has been months."

	"I'm sure he's pacing back and forth, eagerly waiting for you to come."

	"He's likely doing his morning exercises right now," she said.

	"Sweat running down his brow, bare arms glistening in the light of the green sky, 
revving up his motor for an evening with you."

	"Yes," she said eagerly, then turned very red and said, "We are always happy to 
see each other.  And he's always happy to see his relatives as well."

	"I wanna see Grandpa do the sword dance," Miroku said.

	"Yeah, me too!  I'm gonna be a great warrior like him and Mommy one day!" 
Deirdre said proudly.

	"I thought you wanted to be a great sorceror like your father," Mitsune said to her.

	"That too."

	"And a logrus master," Akari said.

	"Yep."

	"I thought you said you wanted to be a great Pattern master like Motoko-
mommy," Miroku said.

	"Yep."

	"You can't do ALL those things," Miroku said.

	"Sure I can," Deirdre said.  "They'll call me Deirdre the Great!  And give me lots 
of ice cream."

	"But not for breakfast," Mitsune said.

	"Aww!"

	"Is all well with you, Moonshade?" Rimururu asked her.

	"I had sweet, sweet loving with my wives and husband last night," Moonshade 
said, grinning.  "I can almost still feel them touching me."

	Rimururu turned red.  Mitsune said in Elven, 'Isillome, not in front of the 
children.'

	'Oh come on', Moonshade said.  'A little teasing never hurts.  And you know you 
want to.'

	'Teasing about what, Mommy?' Deirdre asked in Elven.

	Moonshade started.  'What...when did you start speaking Elvish?'

	'Is this Elvish?' Deirdre asked.  

	Miroku said, "Hey, no fair talking in funny languages we don't know!"

	'Tell your mother not to be naughty,' Mitsune said to Moonshade.

	'Stay good, Mommy, stay good!' Deirdre said firmly.

	'The Old Blood is strong,' Moonshade murmered, then said, "I'm sorry, Rimururu.  
I know you can't be with your husband very often, until he's set free, so I shouldn't say 
stuff like that."

	"Apology accepted," Rimururu said tightly.

	"I just have a big mouth."

	"The better to kiss Daddy with," Deirdre said.

	Moonshade's ears blushed ever so slightly.  

	Davros and Motoko now entered.  Motoko bowed.  "Aunt Rimururu," she said.  "I 
apologize for making you wait.  There is no excuse for our lateness."

	"Every family is always late," Rimururu said.  "Eat breakfast, and then we'll go."

******************

	Shizumaru whirled through the kata, wooden blades spinning about him.  
Technically, he wasn't supposed to have even wooden blades, but as with many political 
prisoners, what is and what should be were not the same.  He spun and danced, enjoying 
having an audience for once.

	Deirdre clapped her hands.  "Faster!  Faster!"

	He sped up, and she clapped more.  Akari smiled as she sat in her grandmother's 
lap.  "Yay!"

	Miroku said, "Shapeshift into a whirlwind!"

	"Grandpa can't turn into whirlwinds," Deirdre said with a tone of superiority.  
"Don't you know that?"

	He stuck out his tongue at her.  

	"Don't stick out your tongue at your sister," Rimururu said, her eyes still fixed on 
her husband.

	"Listen to your grandmother," Motoko said.

	"Aunt Motoko is right," Akari said.

	Motoko's left eyebrow twitched subtly.  Mitsune quietly reached over and took 
her hand for a moment.  

	Rimururu frowned ever so slightly, then forgot about it, rapt in watching 
Shizumaru practice.

	He finally stopped, then said to Miroku, "Did you like that, nephew?"

	"Yeah, it was great, Grandpa!" he said.

	Deirdre clapped.  "Let me try!"

	Shizumaru came over and knealt by her. "I'm afraid we don't have a sword your 
size."

	"I could use Mommy's magic sword!"

	Moonshade said, "You'll have to try it when you're older, honey."

	"Awww!!!!!"

	Shizumaru turned to Akari and picked her up.  "You're growing so fast," he said.

	"I am?" she asked.

	"Yes."

	"She hardly..." Miroku began, before Mitsune's hand slid over his mouth.

	"I can do a little dance for you," Akari said.

	"Really?" Shizumaru asked.

	She got out a set of paper dolls and tossed them about, then beat out a rythym 
with her hands.  The dolls began to dance.

	Rimururu's eyes widened and Miroku clapped, though he was off the beat.  
Mitsune and Motoko both smiled, and Moonshade said, "You're getting really good at 
that, Akari."

	Akari smiled.  "Thank you, Aunt Moonshade."

	"She's a mommy, not an aunt," Miroku said.  

	"She's not my mommy," Akari replied.

	"We all have three mommies," Deirdre said.  "Our own mommies, and two more 
mommies.  And a daddy."

	"Only one Mommy made me," Akari said.  Sadly, she said, "And my daddy's 
dead."

	Shizumaru said, "But I'm sure he watches over you, honey."

	Mitsune said quickly, "Miroku, honey, why don't you show us one of your 
tricks?"

	Motoko said to Mitsune via their mental contact through their hands, [Are you 
sure that's a good idea?]

	{Better than discussing dead people again,} Mitsune said.  

	Miroku got up and stepped forward, then ran towards Shizumaru.  As he ran, he 
turned into a cat, leaping into the air and landing on Shizumaru's shoulder.

	Shizumaru laughed and reached up to pet him.  "Very nice," he said.

	Miroku-neko purred happily, then climbed up onto Shizumaru's head and leapt off 
it, turning human again in the air, then landing at his father's feet.  "Ta da!"

	Davros smiled at him.  "Very good, son."

	Miroku said, "Thanks, Daddy."

	Deirdre said, "I wanna do something special for grandpa!"

	"Okay," Shizumaru said.  "What would you like to do?"

	She scratched her head, then said, "Oh, I know!  See, I can spell!"  She began 
waving her arms about and chanting.  This went on for several minutes, and then a half-
dozen dancing lights surrounded her and began bobbing about.  

	"Very good, niece," Shizumaru said.  "Did your father teach you that?"

	"And Mitsune-mommy and Motoko-mommy.  They taught me how to make one.  
But I figured out how to make lots all on my own!"

	"I bet you'll be a great sorceress one day."

	"I wanna be a great swordsman like you one day too!" she said.  "I'm gonna do it 
all!"

	"It'll be a lot of work," Shizumaru said to her.

	"I'll work real hard," Deirdre said.  "Between naps."

	He laughed.  "You do that."

	"I will!"

	Motoko rose.  "I'm sure you and Aunt Rimururu would like some time to 
yourselves now.  Thank you for letting us visit, Uncle."

	"I'm always happy to see you all," he said.  "Goodbye, granddaughter," he said, 
patting Akari on the head.  "Goodbye, niece and nephew," he said to Deirdre and Miroku.

	"Bye, bye!" Deirdre said.

	"See you later, Grandpa," Miroku said.

	Everyone said their farewells and departed, leaving Shizumaru and Rimururu 
alone.  "Poor Akari," she said.  "Growing up in that house."

	"Davros and Motoko have chosen their own roads, my love.  Not our roads, and I 
cannot see how they can justify their path, but..."  He sighed.  "But it's clear to me that 
they all love Akari.  They're setting her some bad examples, but at least she has a family, 
and she is loved."

	"Your mother didn't have a choice," Rimururu said softly.

	"We shall see.  I can't expect something like this could long survive.   But time 
will tell.  Now, come and tell me what all you've been up to, my love."

	They kissed, and talking was delayed a while.

****************

	Deirdre sat and watched her mother practice with Sansacure.  "When do I get to 
learn to be a mighty warrior?" she asked.

	Moonshade paused, and sheathed her sword.  "Well, I didn't start until I was a lot 
older than you, but I suppose if you really want to, we could start whenever you like."

	"Yeah!"

	She said, "I'll see about getting you a little wooden sword your size and we can 
start tomorrow, okay?"

	"Okay!"

	Moonshade began whirling about again; out of the corner of her eye, she could 
see Deirdre trying to imitate her with an imaginary sword, and she smiled.  You'll be a 
great warrior one day, she thought.

	Mitsune stuck her head in.  "Yo, Shady, Ramon's here to see you."

	"Yay!  Grandpa's here!" Deirdre said.

	She blinked.  "Uncle Ramon's here to see me?"

	"He popped by yesterday, but you and Deirdre were gone to Dworkinland."

	"Send him in," Moonshade said.

	Mitsune left; Ramon soon came in with a long box wrapped in green paper.  
"Hello, daughter," he said to Moonshade.  "Hello, Deirdre," he said to her.  

	She ran over to him.  "Play airplane with me, Grandpa!"

	He began to spin in place, holding her at arm's length as she howled with delight.

	Moonshade said, "Sorry you missed us, father."

	"I hear you had quite an adventure there."

	Moonshade laughed nervously.  "You could say that, yeah."

	Ramon stopped spinning, then tossed Deirdre into the air.  She laughed.  "Higher, 
grandpa, higher!"

	Ramon glanced over at Moonshade who said, "We've got a high ceiling in here."

	They began tossing Deirdre back and forth, a little higher each time, as she yelped 
with delight.

	The hairs on the back of Ramon's neck suddenly stood up, which he knew from 
long experience meant Keiko was giving him the glare of death.  "She asked us to do 
this," he said frantically.

	Keiko, from the doorway, said, "And of course, five year old children always 
know what is good for them."  

	Moonshade caught Deirdre.  "Hey, we're good enough not to ever drop her."

	"And leaving one of our grandchildren alone in Dworkinland?  What did you 
think you were doing?"

	"Hey, EVERYONE has to go to the bathroom sometimes!  I didn't think she'd get 
lost in the time that took!" Moonshade protested.

	"I didn't get lost.  YOU got lost, mommy," Deirdre proclaimed.

	"And now you're playing catch with one of my grandchildren!"

	"We're playing airplane!" Deirdre said.  "You want to play, grandma?"

	"Honey, I'm not very good at catching and throwing things," she said to Deirdre.

	"No, I meant they could throw you!  It's lots of fun!"

	"..."

	Smoke came out of Ramon's ears.

	Moonshade tried to speak, but only incoherent noises came out.

	"Did I say something bad again?" Deirdre asked.

	"You just destroyed some of Grandmother's brain cells, Deirdre," Keiko said.  

	"What's a 'brain cell'?"

	"It's a long, boring story."  She leaned over and picked up the package.  "This is 
for you."

	"Does Miroku not get anything for being bad?"

	"No, I already gave Miroku his present," Keiko said.  

	"Oh, okay."  She tore open the box and pulled out a small wooden sword.  
"Ooooh!"

	"I wanted to give you some nice dresses, but Ramon insisted on giving you this 
boring old sword," Keiko said.

	She swished it around, nearly whacking Keiko in the head several times.  "It's 
great!  Thank you, Grandma and Grandpa!"  She jumped over onto Keiko, who nearly 
dropped her, but caught her in time.  "Are you going to have time to go shopping with me 
this time?"

	"We can only stay a little while," Keiko said.  "But we'll be here until tomorrow 
morning."

	"We could go shopping tonight!"

	"You just want to do everything, don't you," Keiko said.

	"Yeah!"

	"Alright.  We'll see if Akari wants to go with us, and then we'll go shopping," 
Keiko said to her.

	"Woo!" Deirdre shouted.  "Did you bring Nanami with you?"

	"We..."

	There was a crashing noise in the distance.

	"Oooh, you did!"

	Keiko sighed.  "Delightful."

*****************

	"So, as you see, the trade treaty fails to discuss the entire issue of re-exported 
Akashan products.  Given that your house rather failed to ingratiate yourselves to the 
Akashans by trying to make their sun go nova, there is little choice but to use Amber as 
the middle-man for this trade, if you really want access to their bio-technology by 
legitimate means, Lord Harkonnen."  Motoko shrugged as if to indicate she was but an 
interpreter and not a maker of policy.

	"But Lord Gaav exceeded his orders!" the flabby Lord Harkonnen protested.  
"And what about these export and import taxes!  That's double taxation!"

	"That's the problem of using a middle-man.  You could, of course, approach the 
Akashans yourself," Mitsune said.  "You might not end up being 'accidentally' caught in 
the radius of a mind-scrambler like the last embassy you sent.  Or not used for 
experiments in how quickly flesh can rot like those proxies you tried to use to steal the 
information."

	"Those were rogue operatives, not authorized by the..."

	He was interrupted when a black cat leaped onto the table, scattering papers 
everywhere.  It sprinted across the table as a five year old blond girl leaped up onto the 
table, a chair held over her head.  "Come back here,  Miroku!" she shouted.

	A little blond boy clad in red and yellow ran after them.  "Stop fighting!  We're 
supposed to be playing, not destroying everything!"

	They ran on out of the room.  Mitsune rose.  "I'm sorry, Lord Harkonnen.  I 
believe I have to beat up the children and my husband the idiot who was supposed to be 
running herd on them."

	"..."

	She swept out of the room with a certain regal anger about her.  Motoko watched 
her go, then turned to the Lord, carefully keeping her face calm.  "Now, as I was 
saying..."

****************

	Mitsune grew a third arm so she could hold all three of them by their shirts.  
"Now, WHAT happened?

	"We were going to play tag, but Miroku touched my butt!" Nanami Minor said.

	"I couldn't reach the rest of her!" Miroku said.  "But her butt was big and I could."

	"And where's Akari?" Mitsune asked her still-shrunken husband.

	"She had more sense than to get into this," Chibi-Narya replied.

	"And why exactly didn't you grow back up and use the Logrus to grab them both 
with tendrils before they could run through the middle of a trade discussion?"  Mitsune 
asked.

	"Because I mindshifted myself to think like a five year old so I could play tag 
with them fairly."

	Mitsune sighed.  "Miroku, you shouldn't touch girl's butts."

	"But you and Daddy touch each other's butts all the time!  Daddy touches lots of 
girls' butts!"

	"Your daddy only touches the butts of girls he's married to," Mitsune said sternly.  
He'd better only be touching our butts.  "You are not married to Nanami."

	"Hey, Nanami, want to marry me?" Miroku asked Nanami.

	"I'd rather eat worms!" Nanami shouted at him.

	"Can I touch Akari's butt?  She is my sister," Miroku asked.

	"No!"

	"Aunt Mitsune, can I kick Miroku's ass?" Nanami asked her.

	"I'm very tempted to say yes, but no, you can't."

	"I'm going to kick it myself."

	"Aww!!!" 

	"Ack," Miroku said.  "I was just playing tag!"

	"Davros, turn back to normal, please."

	He wiggled out of her grasp and dropped to the floor.  Mitsune reabsorbed her 
extra arm and he reverted to normal, just as Deirdre, Moonshade, Keiko, and Ramon 
arrived.  "Where's the riot?" Moonshade asked.

	"Riot's over," Mitsune said.  "Davros, honey, try and keep the kids out of the trade 
negotiations, okay?"

	"Okay," he said, embarrassed.

	"Do you want to come shopping for dresses with mommy and Deirdre?" Keiko 
asked Nanami.

	"Dresses are stupid," Nanami announced.  "You can't kick in them."

	"I'll go if we go to the toy store!" Miroku said.

	"Sorry, we're going shopping for dresses and pretty jewelry," Keiko said.

	"I guess I'll just stay here and touch Nanami's butt," Miroku said.

	Nanami shrieked.

	"No butt-touching," Davros said.  "Nanami, Miroku, you two come with me, and 
I'll read you a nice story."

	"You can read us the book Grandma gave me!" Miroku said excitedly.

	"Booookkkk...." Deirdre said.
	
	"You can't go shopping and listen to the book," Keiko said to Deirdre.

	Deirdre sighed.  "Let's go shopping, 'cause the book will be there tomorrow, and 
you won't."

	"Mommy's going to die?" Nanami asked frantically.

	"No, no, I mean she goes home tomorrow!" Deirdre said.

	"Oh, okay."

*****************

	" 'So, then the evil witch picked up Gretel to put her in the oven' ," Davros read.  
He paused.  "So what do you think Hansel did next?"

	"He picked up the rolling pin and whacked her in the back of the knees!" Nanami 
said.  

	"He turned into a wolf and leaped on her and ripped her apart!" Miroku said.  

	Davros twitched ever so slightly.  "Umm...well, no."  He started reading again.  " 
'While the witch wasn't looking, Hansel threw water on the fire, so it wouldn't heat the 
oven.  Then, while she was busy waiting for Gretel to cook, he hacked into her spell rack 
and used her own spells to turn her into a toad.' "  This certainly isn't how I remember 
these stories going when I was a kid, he thought.  He checked the cover.  'Grimm's Fairy 
Tales for Junior Sorcerors'.  Ahh, right, he thought.

	"He could have pulled her out with the Logrus, right, Dad?" Miroku asked.

	"He should have shoved her in her own oven and baked her," Nanami replied.  

	"He could turn into fire and bake her with his own body!"

	"He could kick her in the balls!" Nanami said.

	"Girls don't have balls," Miroku said sagely.

	"Let's not talk about balls," Davros said.  "Want to hear another story?"

	"I wanna hear 'The Little Mermaid Plunders House Darios'!" Miroku said.

	"Yeah!  Read us that one!" Nanami said.

	"How about 'The Phoenix, the Fox, the Wolf, and the Bear' or 'The Glue Box' or 
'Cinderella'?" 

	"BORING," Nanami announced.  "Now, if Cinderella got magic weapons from 
her fairy godmother to beat up her evil step-mother with...that would be good."

	"PLUNDER!" Miroku shouted.

	"PLUNDER!" Nanami shouted.

	They began to chant "PLUNDER...PLUNDER...PLUNDER..." in unison.

	Davros sighed.  "The Little Mermaid Plunders House Darios it is."  He flipped 
through the book.  " 'There was no one who was feared so much in the Seven Seas of 
Shadow as the Pirate-Sorceress-Queen Jasmine, a mermaid from Rebma.  The daughter 
of an humble innkeeper, she had become the terror of the seas in order to get away from 
home.  There was no one who could stop her making off with all the pretty jewelry and 
lovely dresses she'd looked at but not yet purchased whenever she wanted.  House Darios 
hated her because she always raided their treasure fleets bringing them back lovely jewels 
and gold and fine cloths from their colonies in Shadow.  So, one day...' "

***********	

	"So how's it been going for y'all?" Ramon asked as he unleashed a spinning kick 
into Moonshade's gut, sending her sprawling.

	"Pretty good.  We got our butts kicked about the whole trip to Dworkinland, 
though."  She flipped back to her feet, then charged him with a barrage of punches.  He 
blocked them all, then caught the last one and rolled backwards, flinging her over him 
across the room into a wall.  "Man, trying to run herd on kids is like wrestling monkeys."

	"Yeah, I know," he said.  "Have any of yours broken through the wall in the 
middle of the night yet?"

	"Not yet," she said.  "Thankfully."  She peeled herself off the wall, then moved in 
more cautiously.   Ramon took this chance to unleash a flurry of kicks at her; she blocked 
them as best she could, then managed to sweep one of his legs, landing him on his butt.  
"They're all starting to pick up a little magic, though.  And Miroku is already picking up 
some shapeshifting."

	As she tried to stomp him while he was down, he rolled out of the way, and pulled 
her stomping leg out from under her.  She went down on her butt as he leaped to his feet, 
then flipped away before he could kick her head.  "You spar much with Davros?" he 
asked.

	"Yeah, every day if we can," Moonshade said.  "We're going to start teaching the 
kids to fight soon, too."

	"Good.  Start young and you grow up strong," Ramon said.  "I'm glad they're all 
so healthy."  He ducked under a kick and tried to sweep her legs, but she jumped out of 
the way.

	"Yeah, me too," Moonshade said.  "Though I sometimes wish they'd get tired 
quicker."

	"All part of the joys of parenthood," Ramon said.

	She came in strong, unleashing more waist-level punches, then suddenly switched 
to a kick just below the groin.  It got through Ramon's defenses and he went flying.  "It 
gets kinda weird sometimes."

	"Well, you seem like a good mother to me," Ramon said.

	"Thanks," she replied.  "I hope Dad would be proud."

	"I'm sure he would," Ramon replied, then leaped over her and kicked her in the 
back, knocking her down.  "Until he saw me get away with that, anyway."

	She spat gravel out of her mouth.  "You do that to him much?"

	"All the time.  I couldn't touch him with a weapon, but he couldn't hardly hit me 
with a fist unless he got me drunk first," Ramon replied.

	She leaped up, then wiped her mouth.  "I think that's enough getting my ass 
kicked for one day."

	"Alright.  I'll go check in with Davros and the kids, then."

	"Okay.  I'm off to the baths if anyone needs me."

*****************

	" 'House Darios burned in the distance as Jasmine led her fleets away.  It would 
take her months just to try on all her new jewelry.'"  Davros looked down at Nanami and 
Miroku, both of whom had curled up asleep.  I hadn't realized it was naptime already, he 
thought.

	Ramon crept in and mimed incomprehensibly at Davros, who got up, put the book 
down, and slipped out into the hallway with him.  "Did you have fun sparring with 
Moonshade?" Davros asked.

	"Yeah.  She's getting pretty good.  Keeps you on your toes, I bet."

	"Yes, she does, in many ways," Davros said.  "She and Mitsune both have rather a 
knack for keeping Motoko and I in line."

	"Everything going good with you and Motoko?" he asked.

	"I often find it hard to believe I could be so fortunate as to be loved by someone 
so magnificent as her.  All is well with us," Davros replied.

	"Good, good," Ramon replied.  "So when are you two going to have a kid?"

	"When the Serpent wills it.  We could probably force a pregnancy with all of our 
combined resources, but we think it best to wait until it happens on its own."

	"You are...uhh..."  Ramon blushed slightly.

	"In ways which non-shifters can't even try, at times," Davros said.

	Ramon turned more red.

	"To feel her twined about my body like a garment, like a second skin..."  He 
paused.  "But I suspect you do not wish to hear the details, and I know she would not like 
me telling them, so I will stop."

	"Thank you," Ramon said.
	
	"Although I would expect that if you tried enough, you could probably learn 
shapeshifting yourself, given your mother knows how.  In which case..."  Davros shook 
his head.  "I sound like a servant of Kundali."

	"So, is all the Diplomatic stuff going well?" Ramon asked.

	"Let's go to the kitchens and get a drink, and we can talk all about it," Davros 
said.

	"Thanks, a drink would be good."

******************  

	Deirdre laughed and clapped her hands.  "You look pretty, Akari!"

	Akari twirled in front of the mirror, green chiffon whirling about her.  "You think 
so?"

	"It's a very lovely dress," Keiko said.  She turned to Deirdre.  "Honey, you should 
wear a gold top with the purple skirt, not a green one."

	"Oh, right!"  She ran off to find a nice gold top.  

	"I'm going to try the blue one now!" Akari said, ducking into the waiting room.

	"Hello, Mother," Motoko said from behind Keiko, who started.

	"Hello, Mother," Mitsune said.  "Mind if we join you?"

	"Done with Lord Harkonnen?" Keiko asked.  I will never quite get used to 
Mitsune or Moonshade calling me 'Mother', she thought.  

	"Lord Harkonnen saw the light of reason," Motoko said.

	"The trade agreement has been renewed, since he never really had any room to 
wiggle.  Which didn't stop him trying," Mitsune said.  She made a face.  "You'd think 
House Tremere would choose a less repulsive envoy."

	"Politics makes strange bedfellows," Motoko observed.  

	"Look, mommy, mommy, grandma!  It's gold!" Deirdre said, proudly holding up a 
blouse, then running into the changing room.

	Motoko blinked, and Mitsune smiled.  

	"I told her she needed a gold one," Keiko said to Motoko.

	"Ahh."

	Keiko looked off thoughtfully the way she'd gone.  "So why do Miroku and 
Deirdre call me grandma and Akari calls me aunt?"

	"Because Deirdre and Miroku have three mothers, but Akari only wants one," 
Mitsune said.  "Perhaps because they are children of the Rites, and Akari is not.  
Sometimes, I think Deirdre and Miroku have a little bit of all four of us in them, and 
that's why."  

	"I think of them all as my own children," Motoko said.  "As best I can."

	"So do I," Keiko said softly.  "Well, grandchildren.  Though I'd like to see you 
have one of your own, Motoko."

	"Three children is enough for the four of us.  If the Serpent wills that Davros and I 
have a child or that I...father...a child upon one of the others, then so it shall be.  It is not 
as if any of us don't have eternity to have children in, and prophecy does speak of my 
children to come, so..."

	Keiko shook her head.  "Well, I can understand not wanting more children all at 
once.  They can be a bundle of trouble."

	"Or a sweet joy," Mitsune said.

	"Or both at once," Motoko said.

	"Exactly," Keiko said.  "Well, now that you're here, I can get your advice on some 
outfits."

	"Fire away, Mother."

	We will now flee this scene, as none of our fair readers wish to see fifty pages of 
trying on dresses, I hope.

***************
	
	"Oh, great Serpent, bless this meal, this house, and all who dwell within.  Hold us 
in your coils and let us bathe in the light of your grace as we go about our daily lives..."  
Davros was blessing dinner as everyone sat with heads bowed.

	"Daddy, hurry up, I'm hungry!" Deirdre said.  Miroku snickered.  

	"And do not come and eat small children who can't be quiet during grace, even if 
they deserve it," Davros continued.

	Motoko kicked his leg under the table, so he switched gears as Deirdre eeeped, 
"May we always seek your wisdom and follow the tracks you have left for us.  Let us eat 
of your bounty."

	"Mmm, Serpent booty," Miroku said as he started eating his roast beef.

	"Ewwwww," Deirdre and Akari said in unison.

	Nanami said, "Roast snake is pretty good."

	"We are eating of the 'bounty' of the Serpent, not his booty," Davros said.

	"Yeah, snakes don't have any booty, anyway," Deirdre said.

	"Let's not discuss this at the dinner table, okay?" Keiko asked.

	"Okay, grandma," Deirdre said.  

	Miroku began turning his mashed potatoes into a fortress for his peas.  Nanami 
glanced over, then decided she'd build herself a BETTER fortress.  So did Deirdre once 
she saw what the others were doing.  Akari, on the other hand, simply ate her peas.

	"Did you have fun shopping?" Moonshade asked.

	"Yes," Motoko said, smiling.  "Father will just die when he sees Mother in one of 
those outfits."

	"Motoko..." Keiko said, embarrassed.
	
	"He'll probably faint," Mitsune said.  

	"Oh, I could see Keiko in a sack, and still be impressed," Ramon said, then 
paused.  "That's not a hint to start wearing sacks, though."

	Keiko laughed softly.  "I'll keep that in mind."

	"It's not half as risque as what we talked Motoko into buying, though," Mitsune 
said.

	Motoko now turned red herself.  "Mitsune..."

	"I'd have jumped on her myself, but it would have been rude in front of Keiko," 
Mitsune continued.

	"Will she be more of a hussy than me?" Moonshade asked.

	"I'm going to be a hussy too, one day!" Deirdre announced, while trying to prop 
up one sagging wall of her fortress with some carrots.

	"Deirdre..." Motoko said.

	"You'll be a great hussy one day," Moonshade said.

	"Davros, say something," Motoko said.

	"Honey, do you even know what a hussy is?" Davros finally asked.  

	"It's a kind of cavalry, right?" Deirdre said.

	"..."

	"NEXT Topic," Keiko asserted.

****************
	
	Miroku curled up, arms around his Serpent plushie.  "Daddy, I love you," he said 
softly.

	"I love you too, Miroku," he said, kissing his son on the forehead and pulling up 
the covers.  "Sleep tight."

	"You're not going to die or anything, are you?" Miroku asked.

	"I'm not going to die.  I have walked the Logrus, and the power of the Serpent 
dwells inside me.  I will live forever.  And so will you, one day."

	"Daddy, why do you always tuck me in instead of Mommy?"

	"Because Mitsune always tucks Akari in."

	"Because they're both girls?" Miroku asked.

	"Because Akari's father can't do it."

	"Why don't you tuck Deirdre in, then?"

	"I can't be in two places at once," Davros said.  

	"Oh.  Okay.  Why doesn't the Serpent ever come and tuck us into bed?"

	"He's very busy, and there's too many children for him to tuck them all in."

	"Why doesn't he ever come eat with us, since he's married to Motoko-mommy?"

	Davros smiled.  "The Serpent is busy watching over everyone.  But he comes 
when Motoko needs him most.  And he will come when you need him most too."

	"Do I have to marry him?"

	"You could be a priest like me.  I'm sort of married to the Serpent."

	"Cool." He paused.  "I bet Deirdre wants to marry the Serpent when she grows 
up."

	Davros laughed and stood up.  "Probably.  Sleep well, my son."

	"Good night, Daddy."

*******************

	Motoko sat on the porch with her mother, looking out across the Courts of Chaos 
under a purple sky.  She sipped her wine.  "Yes, I believe we should be able to come up 
for several weeks before High Summer, mother.  There are many members of the family 
I'd like them all to have a chance to know better."

	"Good," Keiko said.  "I want a chance to dote on them all.  And spoil them 
rotten."

	Motoko sipped her wine again, and said, "They all love you very much."

	"You need to do something about all the strange ideas they get in their heads, 
though.  Although all children are like that."

	"I wish the word 'hussy' had never been invented," Motoko said.
	
	Moonshade came out to the porch.  "Well, Deirdre's squared away."

	"Come out to assure me you didn't try anything with my husband?" Keiko asked 
Moonshade.

	Moonshade blushed.  Motoko said, "Mother, please, not another fight."

	Keiko said, "If I really thought you would marry my daughter and then chase my 
husband, I'd be electrocuting you by now."  She sipped her wine.  "This is heady stuff, 
daughter."

	"House Nurgal makes very fine wines, and insists on giving us large amounts 
free," Motoko said.

	"I can't imagine how you four make this work," Keiko said, flushing a little for no 
reason.  "Ramon is mine, mine, mine, and I'd rather be turned into a mind-controlled 
zombie again than to share him with anyone else in the universe."

	"It isn't easy, sometimes, especially with the children," Motoko said.  "Sometimes 
we fight.  But we always make up."

	Keiko poured herself more wine.  "The spices of this are very enticing."  She 
chugged another glass.  "I never really entirely realized what jealousy really feels like, 
until you showed up, Moonshade."

	"I...uhh...sorry," Moonshade said, pouring herself a glass of wine.

	"Mother, you shouldn't drink the wine so fast," Motoko said, worried.

	"You never really appreciate what you have until you're worried about losing it," 
Keiko said, slugging down more wine.

	"I never had a chance," Moonshade said firmly.  "He loves you _very_ much."

	"I was terrified," Keiko informed her wine glass, before filling it again.  "I'd never 
had any real competition.  And what little there was, I knew I was smarter, prettier, and 
better."

	"Why are you telling me this?" Moonshade asked weakly.

	"Because...two people work fine by themselves, but with four...I can't see how 
you wouldn't worry about others being loved more than you."  Keiko sipped her wine.  
"Don't you ever wonder if Motoko loves Davros more than you, Moonshade?"

	"Mother!" Motoko said.  "That's enough wine for you."  She reached over and 
took her mother's wine glass.  "Don't ask such questions."

	"Love isn't about who loves who more," Moonshade replied.  "And even when 
you just think about one person, you love them more some days than others."  She came 
over and wrapped her arms around Motoko, who stiffened slightly.  "I love Motoko, and 
Davros, and Mitsune each in their own way, and I'm sure they each love me in different 
ways.  There are things each of them can't do for me and one of the others can.  So I don't 
worry about it.  I don't know if we'll be a love for the ages or what, but I intend to grab all 
the love I can with both hands."

	"Moonshade, flower of my heart, you are squeezing my breasts while my mother 
is watching," Motoko said ever so faintly.

	"Oop, sorry about that," Moonshade said, pulling her hands down lower to cross 
round Motoko's stomach.
 
	"I can't believe you don't ever get jealous," Keiko said to Moonshade.  "And 
gimme more wine."

	"Oh, I do sometimes," Moonshade said, "But every love affair has some jealousy, 
right, Motoko?"

	"Exactly," Motoko said.  "And no, Mother, you may not have more wine."

	"Hmph.  It's your duty as my daughter to give me more wine," Keiko said 
petulantly.

	"It's my duty to make sure you stay sober," Motoko replied.  "I think you'd best 
get to bed to sleep that off."

	"I am NOT drunk," Keiko protested as they dragged her inside.  "Look, I can still 
do magic."  She tried a spell, which flung flowers everywhere.

	Motoko sighed.  "I had forgotten how potent that wine can be."

	"You just shapeshifted it all away, I bet.  Or stored it in your magic hollow leg," 
Keiko said.

	"Damn, that wasn't Jesby Brandy she was drinking, was it?" Moonshade asked.
	
	"Nurgal's Best Spiced Cinnamon Wine," Motoko said.

	"It's got a nice kick."

	"I've got a nice kick too!" Keiko announced, kicking the wall.

	Motoko knocked at the guest room.  "Father, are you in yet?"

	Ramon came to the door.  "Yes, I..."  He sniffed.  "She's been drinking?"

	Motoko sighed.  "I forgot Mother has poor alcohol tolerance and how potent 
Chaosian wine is."

	"Well, I'll take care of her," he said, taking her from Moonshade.  "See you in the 
morning, I guess."

	Motoko said, "I will see you at breakfast, Father."  She kissed her father on the 
cheek and departed.

	As soon as the door closed, Keiko straightened up.  "I see I can still fake being 
drunk."

	"..."

	"Sometimes, you have to be blunt, but you can't afford to be, so..."

	"Were you asking them rude questions about their love life?" Ramon asked Keiko 
disapprovingly.

	"I want our daughter to be happy," she said.  "And, I have to admit, that wine is 
pretty strong, so I suspect I did say a little more than I planned to."

	"I think she is happy," Ramon said.

	"That's because you're an incurable optimist who only sees the best of people."

	"And you always put on your dark glasses before you look at things," he replied.

	"Someone has to," she said.  "But sometimes, I'm glad you only see on the 
brighter side of things."

	"Why?" he asked.

	She twined her arms around him.  "Because it means you see only the brighter 
side of me, my husband."

	He picked her up, embracing her.  "That's because I love you."

	"I know I am not always the easiest woman to love," she said, kissing his neck.  

	"You are the easiest woman to love that ever was," Ramon said, carrying her over 
towards the bed.  "The only woman I could ever want."

	"And you are the only man I have ever loved," Keiko replied.  "Or ever will.  My 
husband, I want you to make love to me tonight.  For as long as you can."

	"So we can't hear them through the walls because we're making too much noise 
ourselves?" Ramon asked, laying her down on the bed and beginning to unbutton the top 
of her dress.

	She laughed loudly.  "Ramon, sometimes you are the thickest block of rock I have 
ever known, and sometimes, you surprise me like that by seeing the truth I dance 
around."

	"Well, last time I made sure to seduce you so that _I_ couldn't hear anything, 
so..."

	Distantly, they heard, "ROCK ME LIKE A HURRICANE, BABY!" echo through 
the walls.

	Keiko said, "Mad passionate sex AND I'm putting up a sound-proofing spell."  
She started casting as he continued undoing her top.

	After he buried his face in her bosom, she never finished the spell, but she didn't 
need to, because he was the only thing that mattered to her.  Everything else, she could 
ignore.

	Until one of the pipes burst the next morning and showered them both with hot 
water, but that, as they say, is a story for another day.


The End



Isiewen – Mist Maiden (for Mitsune)

	
	"Water:  manipulative, flexible, adaptable, emotional"
Shin says, "Air: free, unchained, imaginative, intellectual, flighty"
Shin says, "Fire:  passionate, destructive, hot-tempered, energetic"
Shin says, "Metal:  rigid, logical, ordered, resiliant, unchanging"
Shin says, "Wood: peaceful, patient, staid, slow, dedicated"