STORYTIME!!! --- THE KUGAR AMBER THRONE WAR

As told by John Biles (Anthy), and recorded by Philip Moyer.  Addtional
comments by the usual band of Keep Hangers On.  --- PJM

=========================
=========================

Anthy says, "Okay, we'll begin with a Dramatis Personae:"

Yenll, daughter of Rei, admiral of the Fleets, Steward of the City,
Blessed of the Serpent, daughter of Rei and Gendo, eldest of the line of
Amber

Friend to Sparky, Spymaster of Amber, Favored by Rebma, Wielder of
Grayswandir and Merehallow, Chosen of the Narwhale, and owner of the
Golden Warrior and the Deck of Destiny.

She had Pattern Imprint and a refuge shadow named Zephyr.

Miki, NPC Master of the Revels, and Kozue, NPC pain in the butt, were her
younger siblings.

Gabrielle waves little 'Go Rebma!' flags.

Next came the mysterious Touga, son of Sakura, NPC in exile, intriguer
extraordinaire.

For House Monde, we had Saionji, NPC playboy

For House Harad, two PCs and one NPC--

Eldest of Harad was Leoness, Warden of Arden, Favored of the Nobility,
Chosen of the Unicorn, Possessor of the Jewel of Judgement and Werewindle.

Oh, note...Yenll = Kelly.  Leoness = Barbara (our two female players)

Corrine says, "Whoo."

Oh, further note...doh.  Kelly had Bill Vincent, owner of the secret of
Amber Gunpowder on her side. Leoness has...Makoto the MAD as her ally.

The middle child of Harad was Harpo.

Gabrielle says, "... Harpo."

Harpo was the master of Marx, a flawed Amber which combined elements of
Amber, the Marx Brothers, and Karl Marx.

Harpo was a brilliant Advanced Conjuror and Advanced Trump Artist

He had little flies all over Amber trumping him spy info, and he had a
Horde of Agents in Amber, Ember, Rebma, and all the Golden Circle shadows,
set up in a cell structure, armed with items with multiple 8 point
properties and Trump Walkie-Talkies on secure Trump comm channels.

And he had Keiko as his lover.

Alan beams.  "Flies are useful.  ^_^"

He made a lot of shadow spikards, like those of Bleys.  He had one, Keiko
had one, and he made others, as we shall see...

Gabrielle nods. "Your conjuration rules, as I have said before, John, are
stupidly powerful for a cost of about fifty points."

Anthy says, "Fifty points is as much as Pattern, which can obliterate
entire universes."

Anthy says, "But an item with 12 million 8 point properties can still be
erased by one Magic Negation :)"

Anthy says, "Anyway..."

Gabrielle says, "Unless it's been Ture conjured and has Magic Sink in it."

Anthy says, "Then you use Pattern and turn off Magic."

Gabrielle says, "Meh. Keep on witht he sotry."

Anthy says, "Any intelligent use of Powers can overwhelm reliance on raw
Power.  Anyway."

Finally, Juri, the youngest Harad, recently retired NPC Marshal of Amber

Corrine boggles at the thought of Juri being the -Youngest-. *pause*
Anyway.

Then came Nanami, bitchy younger child of Sakura in her second identity. 
NPC known to be rather 'close' to Touga.

And then came House Tenjou, children of Anthy and Gendo

First of those was Tenchi, played by Dave [Oh, Harpo was played by
Travis].  He was the Psyche god supreme...except the only power he could
afford was Sorcery.

But he was favored by Gendo, who gave him Justice and Mike Loader, tea and
coffee purveyor as an ally.

and favored by Anthy, who aided him with Trump and psyche and the
Demi-Jewel of Air.

Gabrielle asks, "Was Mike's character actually named Mike?"

and favored by Fuyutsuki, who provided him with many nifty gadgets.

Yes, Mike played Michael Loader.  As seen on the Throne War cast page :)

Corrine asks, "Scary, huh?"

Rod addes 'Mihael Loader' to his list of NPCs to be killed/bribed heavily
on sight

Tenchi had control of Lord Baen, the Castellan of Amber, and of Lady
Nabiki, the Lord High Chamberlain.

He possessed the Mysterious book, De Vermis Mysteriss

He was the chosen of the Pyricorn, thus King of Ember

And the Chosen of the Alicorn, who gave him the Bag of Winds

And, thanks to buying the shadow Graceland, he was Elvis Reborn

Corrine says, "..."

Gabrielle says, "..."

With the Graceland Zeppelin Fleet at his command,secreaming hordes of
Fanboys, and an elite squad of Black Op Elvi, armed with Broken Pattern
Sonic Attack Guitars made lovingly by Fuyutsuki

And finally, he had Sean, the Royal Librarian and Sean's wife Firefly (aka
Sailor Saturn) as allies

Rod says, "and thus lots of sailor moon porn...."

and lots of Frank Zappa

The final PC was Kagoyasha, played by Arthur Parker (who looks like a
red-haired Travis.  Played Rhianna in the Squid Gumi game long ago). 
Kagoyasha was the Warfare God, with 66 points of warfare.  His resources
were few but potent--The Pattern Blade Withywindle.  The Spoon.  His
intelligent sock.  His role as Marshal of Amber.  And Davros the Chaos
Stylite.

The Intelligent sock, btw, was an intelligent device capable of using the
Spoon for him to tap its power words and the Demi-Jewel of Wood to defend
him and zap his enemies with Power Words in battle.

Finally, Utena and Wakaba were the youngest NPCs.

As the curtain rose, Harpo had Keiko raid the evidence lockers of the City
of Amber and found many things

Including a torn trump sketch of Sakura, a high powered rifle, a dagger
with a hollow space inside it, the remains of dead chaosians, a map of the
castle with everyone's rooms and the royal quarters marked, the sword
Tyrfing, anti-Shapeshifter poisons,  and a black metal sphere with
something rattling inside it.

Had Harpo made the necessary deductions, he could have prevented a great
tragedy, but as it turned out...no, he didn't.

However, by the sheerest of chances, he, acting in his own interest,
accidentally saved his sister from the Bedside Slaughter, only to doom her
to murder by Kagoyasha later.

Perhaps Fate cannot be denied...

But he too paid the price.

Anyway, later that morning, he met with Juri, convincing her to lead a
Slave Revolt in Therin, for Harpo truly desired to help the slaves gain
their freedom, and he knew Tenchi and Mike Loader planned to exploit the
slaves to provide a diversion to pin down the Therinese army during the
crisis to come.  She accepted a Shadow Spikard from him.  It proved a gift
of mixed utility...

Then Mike Loader met with Juri, trying to convince her to join him and
Tenchi, but she refused, telling him she was going to Therin to free the
slaves.

Then Leoness met with Juri, and Juri berated Leoness for her support of
the Therinese nobility, and told her she was leaving so she didn't have to
fight her siblings, but if either of them killed the other, she would come
for them.

Meanwhile, Yenll prepared her Eregnor terrorist supporters for use later. 
And Kagoyasha prepared his armies for battle.

And then they came to the bedside.

All the siblings but Touga arrived, and a mysterious cloaked figure,
Ulthar the Unlucky, revealed to be a child of Gendo they'd never met, was
there as well.

The will was read, and many presents were given out.

Some were never used, such as the Sipping Logrus given to Harpo, or
Yenll's Ship-in-a-Bottle

Some were destroyed like the set of Fine China and Silverware that the
Spoon originally CAME FROM, which was given to Kagoyasha.

Saionji just got a boot to the head.

In fact, just about all the items got destroyed or not used or stolen,
but...

And then Gendo announced he wasn't actually dying; he just wanted to
retire, and leave for Shadow with Anthy.

Right as he was about to name his heir, the room went dark.

Everyone's powers failed them.

And then, in the dark, Sakura stabbed Gendo.

And shouted, "Your Whore is Next!"

So, being a dutiful child, Tenchi drew Justice and charged in the dark to
his mother's defense, while everyone else hid or ran out of the room. 
Harpo got Gendo and got him out of the room.

Sadly, Tenchi had only 1 Warfare

And so he took the blow meant for Anthy.

And inside his body, Primal Chaos began to expand.

In the hallway, Gendo annoucned he was going to explode soon, so Harpo
trumped him off into the countryside.

Meanwhile, CATS tried to kill Kagoyasha, Harpo, and Leoness in the
hallway.  Yenll handed Greyswandir to Miki, and he cut a hole in the wall.
 Miki, Kozue, and Yenll leaped out the hole, then trumped to safety.

Tenchi called upon the Outsiders, trying to save himself.

This knocked out Anthy and Fuyutsuki

But it broke the darkness and the power block.

Tenchi then trumped to Ember with Anthy, leaving Fuyutsuki unconsious at
the mercy of Sakura and Nanami, who was on her way to kill him.

Saionji, under Nanami's mental control, engaged Utena.

Wakaba panicked for a few crucial seconds.

Juri impaled Nanami with Eternity's Rose, but it got stuck in Nanami for a
few crucial seconds.

Ulthar the Unlucky cackled and tried to use his Golden Skull of
Soul-Draining to kill them all.

And then Sakura stabbed Fuyutsuki with the last of her daggers.

BOOM

Primal Chaos erupted.  Juri, panicked, used her Shadow Spikard to teleport
out.

Primal Chaos rolled over Utena, Wakaba, Saionji, Sakura, Ulthar,
Fuyutsuki, and the already mortally wounded Nanami.

Killing them all.

Fuyutsuki began to regenerate a new body back at the Primal Pattern, but
would be out of it for hours.

Up in Ember, Dave managed to save himself from Primal Chaos...sort of.

Tenchi now consisted of a right hand fused to the bottom of his head's
neck.

And the head, wearing the Pattern Fez, given him by Fuyutsuki.

Gabrielle says, "I believe I speak for us all when I say 'Damn.'"

Corrine just nods, dumbly.

This was one of the funniest moments of my life.  Even Dave fell down
laughing, and it was his character who got messed up.

Gabrielle asks, "Was he skittering around the place liek Thing? "

Kagoyasha, Leoness, and Harpo called Lina, who identified what little was
left of the dead.

Pretty much, Gabby.

They then scattered.

Yenll set her fleets in motion, then went to see Sparky, and learned
someone had been burying guns in the garden.

Harpo also learned this through his spies.

Mike had buried the guns, which were loaded with blanks, as a way of
flushing out other people's spy networks.  He then leaked the news of the
guns in front of people he hoped were spies for other players.

So Harpo built a tunneling device.  It dug around, then replaced all the
guns with ones loaded with blanks.

Yenll told Sparky to go play in the gardens.

So Sparky starts trashing the gardens and the guns.

During all this, Mike was down in a secure room, lining up alliances for
Tenchi with Begma, the Sea Peoples, Talma, Uila, and the Isle of Emeralds.

His spies report the explosion, Juri heading for the Pattern Chamber, and
Sparky on the rampage.

He orders the guards to keep Juri out of the Pattern Chamber, orders spies
to check the explosion, and sends Guards and Black Op Elvii to deal with
Sparky.

Meanwhile, Leoness is trumping her relatives, tryign to find out who died.

She talks to Thing-Tenchi, and much to my GM disgust, doesn't take the
most perfect opportunity in the game to kill Tenchi.

It was the best chance anyone besides Sakura had to kill the man, and she
lets him go.

I cried.  I suspect the GF factor was at work here.

Corrine patpats.

As Barb and Dave are dating.

Shortly afterwards, Mike Loader contacts him, and grafts Dave's remains
into the Robotic Michael Jackson

Gabrielle asks, "May I pose a question, John?"

Tenchi now has a robot body that can raise the dead by dancing and has the
WOO attack.

Anthy says, "Sure, Gabby."

Gabrielle asks, "How did said grafting affect his stats?"

Anthy says, "He got the robot's Strength and Endurance, while keeping his
own Warfare and Psyche"

Gabrielle nods. "Thank you. It'd been buggin me."

Anthy says, "This meant he LOST a TON of Endurance, but his Strength
quadrupled."

Rod says, "and he could moonwalk."

Anthy says, "He also got 4 point armor, even for his head, because his
REAL head was inside a Michael Jackson head helmet"

Anthy says, "He now had a lot more Rythym too."

Corrine says, "this is just... just.... aieeee."

Harpo goes off to spy on stuff.  Leoness wanders around fairly mindlessly.
 Kagoyasha decides it's time to go check on the Pattern.

Rod wants to have shaft's head grafted onto Robo-Jackson now o.o

He finds Juri arguing with the guards.  Only Juri's strong sense of duty
is keeping her from chopping the guards to hamburger.

He uses his Mad Pattern Skillz on Juri and spots her Spikard.

He decides he's going to have to kill her and take it.

I cheer.

But for the moment, he just goes in, checks the Pattern, then leaves. 
Juri is still arguing with guards.

out in the garden, Sparky is slaughtering castle guards and Black Ops
Elvii

Miki, Kozue, and Yenll go out, making an illusionary Tenchi to calm down
both groups, as Yenll knows about the whole 'Elvis Reborn' thing thanks to
her spy network.

The guards and black op Elvii go back to their posts, Sparky goes back to
the stable.

Kagoyasha contacts Davros, they begin to plot.

Meanwhile, Harpo tries to trap Yenll.

He and her decide to go down to the Pattern Chamber.

Rod says, "an'now if you'll pardon me, drive to work"
Rod has disconnected.
>> A joke is the epigram on the death of a feeling - Nietzche

He offers to trump them down.  Being a foolish Whitey, she accepts.

He trumps her into Marx instead, in an Ampitheatre full of hundreds of
Amber ranked Psyche Sorcerors with Wands that contain Power Word Burst of
Psyche, all mind-linked.

Mega-Psychic Onslaught begins

Yenll goes for a Trump.  1.5 in Warfare Harpo knocks it away.  This
happens three times.

Ranked 1.5 with 66 points Harpo, that is.

So, then she launches the Golden Warrior at him.

Harpo's sword bounces off him, and he one punches 5 strength Harpo into
the stadium seating.

Then hordes of muscular wrestlers with items conveying 8 point Vitality
attack the Golden Warrior, making him waste time fighting them.

and Harpo trumps over to Kelly.

But he's too late, as she escapes using the Deck of Destiny, and ends up
at the Beach, where her Cabana boy already has a drink ready for her.

Meanwhile, Harpo rapidly discovers the Golden Warrior is going to kill
everyone in Marx if not stopped, and that he himself isn't up to the job
of stopping said Golden Warrior

So he Alpha-Niners The Golden Warrior, using his control of the shadow to
simply eject the Golden Warrior.

Meanwhile, Leoness goes to the library.

She decides, for no discernable reason, to invade Sean's mind.

Being second in Psyche with 45 points, she easily overwhelms him, but not
before he calls for Firefly.

She learns he works for Mike and Tenchi as a spy.

Firefly charges in, and tries to rain down death on Leoness.  She dodges
the black ribbons.

and then puts her second in warfare (65), First in Strength (30), Eight
Point Force Damage Hammer (The only present given out by Gendo which
actually got used much), and Pattern Blade, Werewindle, to work
slaughtering Firefly.

Pretty soon, the library is burning as bootleg Frank Zappa concert tapes
play in the background.  Leoness grabs a Trump Deck from the library and
tries to trump to Arden.

Only problem...Anthy made four trump trap decks which look like real ones
and Sean put them in the library in place of the real ones.

Leoness and knocked out Firefly and Sean trump into the shadow of infinite
flesh eating beetles.

Alan says, "Not flesh-eating Beatles?  :)"

Leoness abandons them there to be eaten and tries another trump, ending up
in the shadow of infinite nuclear flame.

Another trump--an infinite Void which tries to psychically eat her brain.

A lake of acid...

Battering winds...

Only her 54 points of endurance and her armor have kept her alive.

Finally, she ends up in the shadow of infinite crushing rock.  she holds
her breath and uses her first in strength, then uses Werewindle to cast a
Teleportation spell and gets to Arden, which she fast-times so she can
heal.

This works because she has the Jewel of Judgement as well.

We turn now to one of the most beautifully executed plans of the game.

Kagoyasha scanned the entire castle with his Advanced Pattern, looking for
Tenchi and Juri.

He found De Vermis Mysteris, hidden away in a secret room, so he stole it.

Then he found Juri.

He and Davros used Withywindle's powers to Trump into the room.

Davros sealed the exits with Logrus and Sorcery, then focused on keeping
Juri from using her spikard effectively.

Meanwhile, Kagoyasha, first in warfare, armed with Pattern Blade, went
after Juri, who had roughly the same Warfare, 4 point armor, and a 8 point
force weapon, Eternity's Rose.

Kagoyasha might not have won, except...

His intelligent sock, armed with the Demi-Jewel of Wood and the Spoon,
rained down power words on Juri.  Neural Disrupt, Offensive Luck, Burst of
Pain, etc.  Juri twitched and spasmed like an epileptic.

Kagoyasha killed her, but was gravely injured.

So he and Davros took her body, hopped to Chaos, dumped her body into a
trump-barred shadow, then rested up and quickly returned to Amber.

Meanwhile, Harpo quietly sent a trump trapped letter to Lord Baen, the
castellan

This dumped Baen into Marx, where Harpo ate his brain.

Baen was now Harpo's toy.  He sent Baen back.

Mike finished operating on Tenchi, and the two of them trumped Baen and
told him to meet them at the vault with the keys so they could loot it.

They tried trumping Juri...she was dead.

Baen then trumped Harpo and told Harpo he was going to vault with Mike and
Tenchi

Harpo dressed up an elite Marxian squad in Castle Guard Uniforms, trumped
to the castle, and tried to move to show up once they were all in the
vault.

Oh wait, I forgot one crucial thing...

Let's rewind to when Mike was still operating on Tenchi.

Harpo's spies in Ember told him about this.

So he molded Marx to include a huge meteor the size of Pennsylvania.  Then
he trumped it to the skies over Ember

It began to immediately burn up and plummet towards the castle.

Mike threw Anthy on the operating table (she was still knocked out), and
trumped them to Graceland, where he finished the operation.  The Pyricorn
was notified and did its best to minimize the damage.

So the meteor only destroyed the city, the castle, and about a thirty mile
radius.

Mike and Tenchi decide Touga must have done it.

Okay, back to the Vault...

Tenchi/Baen/Mike began grabbing stuff from the vault, including the
control statuette for the Giant Cow of the Atlan Tepes, a Folding Boat
(VERY important later), some force weapons, and a Pattern Potato with the
word 'reality' etched in the side (Very important later)

But they're only part way through looting when they hear 20 or so people
coming (Harpo and his fake guards)

Dave makes Baen forget what he saw and sets up an explosive magic trap
outside the vault, then he and Mike Trump back to Graceland from outside
the vault, telling Baen to get out before the explosion.

So Harpo finds Baen, and trumps out with him when his Spikard spots the
magic trap Dave set.

About half the Marx squad blows up.

He gets Keiko and returns to the Vault, takes Baen's keys, goes in, and
finishes looting it, and...

He finds a niche with a wall that combines Pattern/Trump.  So he and Keiko
touch it.

This sends them to the Master Vault.

Where he finds the Demi-Jewels of Fire and Metal, the Seed of Hope, and
the Cup of Life

And thus, Fate quietly rises to the ascendent over Destiny...

He takes the items, and he and Keiko return to Marx.

He attunes himself to the DJs

And then he redraws the Marx Flawed Pattern with both

Transforming it into a Pattern of Fire and Metal.  Not just an Elemental
Pattern, but more powerful than an Elemental Pattern, indeed, on its way
to becoming a Primal Pattern.

Kolvir shakes and cracks open

The Metal Pattern shrinks slightly.

And Amber begins to slowly sink

Corrine says, "...."

And the ocean rises over the Port of Amber, kept out of the city only by
the City walls.

Gabrielle says, "..."

The sun rises...at 2/3rds its usual size.

The Golden Circle and the Lava Circle begin to boil away

Corrine whimpers, and sniffles.

And it is a chilly day in Amber.

Kagoyasha returns and basically declares himself Regent, then starts
trying to figure out what is happening.

Fuyutsuki finally wakes up and tells Mike and Tenchi what is going on;
they begin a search for the new Pattern(s)

Meanwhile, Mike and Tenchi begin contacting the generals of the Armies of
Amber via Trump and eating their brains.

The Nobles of Amber are attacking the two naval bases at Leoness'
command..flying the flag of the Marshal of Amber.

Mike and Tenchi contact the heads of the two Amber fleets, eat their
brains, and hand them huge magical bombs which blow up about 2/3rds of
each fleet.

Leoness discovers Yenll's Terrorists planting bombs in front of all the
Princes' rooms.  She kills the ones setting the bombs in front of her
room, and lets the rest work.

Meanwhile, Mike and Tenchi track down and take control of the head of
Yenll's Eregnor terrorists.

The Pyricorn is withering, and screaming in agony.

Corrine exclaims, "Whaaaaaaa!"

Meanwhile, in fast-timed Marx, Harpo is sleeping, having nearly killed
himself with his Pattern redrawing.  Only his endurance boosting item and
his Shadow Spikard saved his life.

Leoness and Yenll encounter each other in the hallways of the Castle. 
They chat, then Leoness tries to kill Yenll.

Yenll loses her left arm to Leoness' Pattern Blade, but trumps out again,
this time to Rebma.

She tells Miki about this, and Miki and Kozue begin plotting to avenge
their sister, and take her to a fast-time shadow to heal.

Kagoyasha, Lina, and Davros begin trying to find a way to deal with Harpo.

Meanwhile, Leoness decides she will use the JoJ to find the new Pattern
and whack whoever made it.

She calls upon Makoto the Mad, and together, they Jewel Teleport to the
center of Marx's Pattern, where Harpo is pattern scrying Ember.

Harpo now has ALL THE BAD STUFF IN THE UNIVERSE.  All of it.

This is what happens when you have 4 good stuff, then attune to two
Demi-Jewels, redraw a Pattern, and acquire Advanced Pattern all in one
shot.

Appropriately, it was the moment he did this that all the other players
suddenly began turning against him.

Ivan says, "Hey, that's only 60-100.  That's not *all* the bad stuff. :)"

Leoness tries to kill Harpo.

Corrine says, "Well, he clearly paid the price."

Harpo spins, thanks to his Mad Warfare Skillz (She's 65, he's got 66
points), and only takes a small wound.

then he blinks out of the Pattern, and turns off Magic.]

Makoto begins to cry like a Baby.

And Leoness realizes she's trapped at the center of a Pattern which Harpo
controls completely.

but she outranks Harpo in Psyche and has the JOJ.  And Makoto the Mad's
psyche backing her up.

After an intense psychic battle, ehr superior Endurance enables her to
last long enough to Jewel Teleport back to Arden with Makoto.

Meanwhile, Fuyutsuki tells Mike and Tenchi that Touga sent the Sakura
Clone

Mike and Tenchi, the Pyricorn, the Alicorn, Fuyutsuki, and Anthy combine
psychic strength and eat Touga's Brain.

They then use Touga's Chaos contacts to get the services of two advanced
shapeshifters who take the forms of Mike and Tenchi

Chaos-Mike is implanted with a MASSIVE Pattern Bomb built aruond the
Pattern Potato.

They then contact Kagoyasha, sending the Chaos-Mike and Chaos-Tenchi to
aid Kagoyasha's planned assault on Marx.

Makoto the Mad and Leoness join them as well.

Meanwhile, Yenll, off on her own, walks the Rebma Pattern and tells it to
send her to the new Pattern.

Oh wait...forgot an Important point...let's rewind slightly.

Before Leoness and Makoto go to join Kagoyasha, they build a huge magical
bomb with the Jewel of Judgement as the central Power Source.

They rig it so the Jewel will Jewel 'port the bomb next to Marx's Pattern,
detonate it, then 'port back to Leoness

This blows a 250 mile radius crater, fifteen miles deep around the
Pattern.

With the Pattern up on top of a fifteen mile high pillar of stone,
surrounded by a thirty foot wide walkway of stone.

Harpo begins using his Mad Pattern Link to repair his shadow.

So when Yenll, Leoness, Makoto, Lina, Kagoyasha, Davros, Chaos-Mike,
Chaos-Tenchi, and 20 Black Ops Elvii arrive, the crater is 'only' 150
miles in radius, and only ten miles deep.

Eudial wakes up.

Eudial wavies

I cheered, as this would make for a grand finale.

Harpo sat in the middle of his Pattern.

LET MORTAL KOMBAT BEGIN!

The plan was simple.  Everyone else covers Leoness while she walks the
Marx Pattern with the JoJ, erasing it as she walks.

Harpo initiates by turning off all powers, even Trump, except for Pattern.
 Davros, Makoto, and Lina curse wildly.

Gabrielle asks, "They never thought of using Blood?"

Anthy says, "They would have needed HARPO's blood, since he redrew it."

Gabrielle says, "Ah."

Now, Chaos-Mike and Chaos-Tenchi had some Tenchi blood with them, but this
didn't do much good.

Then, as Leoness begins to walk the Pattern, Harpo rains down Acid on
them.

Makoto and Lina fall down as acid eats at them.

Corrine OOCly says, "ahwell,... must head out, but I shall leave this
connection here for when I return, so that Logging can continue.  Later!
^_^"

Chaos Dave/Chaos Mike/Davros all use Shapeshift to adjust to the acid.

Kagoyasha saves himself with his Mad PAttern Skillz, then follows Leoness
onto the erased area of the Pattern.  This is important later.

Yenll saves herself with the Demi-Jewel of Water, calling up Water to
dilute the Acid.

Chaos-Dave tries to follow Kagoyasha, but the Pattern eats him, as it is
throwing up sparks wildly.

Then massive rain washes Lina, Makoto, Chaos-Mike, Davros off the
platform.  Ynell presses forward, protecting herself with her D-J.  She
uses it to aid Leoness, as Water defeats Fire.

Rod has connected.
>> How weary I am of my good and my evil!  - Nietzche
Rod says, "oi"

Leoness/Kagoyasha/Ynell now form a sort of Pattern Conga Line

Travis throws Tyrfing at Leoness and wounds her.  He gets it back and does
it again; this time Kagoyasha deflects it with his P-blade.

Meanwhile, Davros and Chaos-Mike sprout wings and save themselves.  Chaos
Mike even flies down and saves Makoto the Mad.

Yenll deflects the next Tyrfing throw and it flies up to Makoto the Mad.

So Chaos-Mike throws Makoto the Mad at Harpo.

And in the sky, music begins to play, and the Unicorn comes charging down
from above.

Makoto the Mad flies over the Pattern, and sparks rise up, consuming him.

Only his hand survives to land, empty, on Harpo's forehead.

Chaos Mike then flies down the pillar a bit, carves himself a fox hole,
and makes tea.

Gabrielle asks, "EVIL tea?"

Naah, just normal tea to relax.   While Davros circles shouting at
Kagoyasha about how he isn't being paid enough for this job, and Kagoyasha
is going to have to give him half the universe as compensation.

Harpo invades Kagoyasha's brain, trying to control him.

Kagoyasha fights back desperately, aided by Yenll.

and then, out of the pit, as the Unicorn charges to Leoness' aid, the
Commiecorn rises up out of the pit, a red unicorn with the Hammer and
Sickle on both sides of his torso in black.

They crash together in the sky.

And begin to battle.

I turn to Travis.  "You don't think you can win.  Do you activate Option
Zero?"

Travis nods.

Option Zero = Cause the remaining unerased part of the Pattern to explode
violently.

Killing Harpo, but taking everyone else with him.

Gabrielle says, ".... except fo rTenchi and Mike, who aren't actually
there."

As things begin to shake, Chaos-Mike sets off the Pattern Potato.

This destroys the pillar the Pattern is resting on

And kills Chaos-Mike.

The sliver of rock the Pattern is on begins to tumble in place, end over
end.

The Explosion is still building.

Yenll decides to help the Unicorn

She summons the Narwhale, and launches it upwards at the Unicorn and
Commie-Corn

They are dwarfed by its bulk.

And then its horn impales them both.  They tumble down the Narwhale's
face, and it eats them.

And then Pattern 'ports out.

The Marx Pattern is tumbling faster, building to explosion.  Kagoyasha
loses his footing, falls on the Pattern, and dies.

I turn to Kelly.  "Activate Option Zero?"

She holds up a note, which says 'yes'

She whips out her Deck of Destiny Card of the Serpent

And because the Deck can't be Trump-Blocked...she trumps the Serpent,
pulling him through.

He uses Davros' body to manifest, becoming Quetzacoatl, the Winged
Serpent.

And then he says to Leoness, "GIVE ME MY EYE BACK AND I WILL MAKE YOU
QUEEN OF CHAOS.  ALL OF REALITY WILL BE PUTTY IN YOUR HANDS.  FOR YOU KNOW
THAT OTHERWISE, YOU WILL SURELY DIE WHEN THIS PATTERN EXPLODES AROUND
YOU."

And Leoness says, "Sure thing."

And the Serpent reclaims his long lost Eye.

The Primal Pattern evaporates.

Fuyutsuki bursts into flames in Graceland and dies.

Anthy keels over and dies.

The subordinate Patterns evaporate.  Harpo dies as his Pattern goes poof.

Makoto's hand falls into the void...(important later)

Gabrielle asks, "There's a LATER?"

The Serpent saves Yenll (His Blessed One of Prophecy) and Leoness (Who
will rule Chaos for him)

And he lets Rebma live while the other Patterns boil away, out of
consideration for Yenll.

Gabrielle asks, "And Kelly, who summoned him?"

Yenll = Kelly, so yes.

Gabrielle shakes his head. "my bad."

Meanwhile, Tenchi survives because he doesn't have Pattern Imprint,
through Graceland is boiling away.

He and Mike activate the Folding Boat, and with the last of his life
force, the Alicorn gives forth a mighty wind to blow them to Chaos.

Yenll is annointed Queen of New Rebma.  Leoness is taken to chaos, and the
Serpent casually eats Ishmael and crowns Leoness as Queen of Chaos.

Shizumaru says, "This...was an absolute bloodbath. X.x"

Devan the Horrible says, "... John's still going on? o.o"

The Folding Boat arrives in Chaos.

Mike and Tenchi make their way to the royal court.

And bow before Leoness, asking if they can be her official procurer of Tea
and Coffee and assistant procurer of Tea and Coffee respectively.  Quoth
Mike:  "I figure in Chaos, there's probably new blends of Tea every DAY."

And then a huge pillar of flame bursts up in the throne room.

Makoto the Mad steps out of it and shouts, "I AM THE BADDEST OF BAD ASS
MOFOS THAT EVER WAS!  HAHA, TAKE THAT REALITY!"  He jumps in the air and
shakes his fist, and we iris out, game over.

Shizumaru says, "Crikey."

Gabrielle exclaims, "What??!?!"

Gabrielle says, "You can't end liek THAT."

Leoness is now Queen of Chaos, Yenll rules Rebma, Kagoyasha and Harpo are
dead, and Tenchi is now Assistant Procurer of Teas and Coffees for the
Queen of Chaos.

Makoto the Mad becomes the new Keeper of the Logrus.

Seamus says, "If it hadn't been so late, I'd have made Dave fight it out.
But we were all dropping."

Gabrielle asks, "Why did Anthy drop dead?"

The Spoon quietly drifts to to the far end of the universe, as far from
the Logrus as it can get.

This version of Anthy was the Unicorn's Daughter.

No Pattern/No Unicorn/Anthy dies too.

Gabrielle says, "Gotcha."

De Vermis Mysteris is lost in Shadow.

Gabrielle says, "John, this was fucked up."

Shizumaru says, "This was depressing. o.o"

And the Golden Warrior continues to hunt for Harpo to kill him.

Regardless of him already being dead...

And this sets the stage for our next Throne War, which will end the
Semester

=========================
=========================

Anthy says, "Mike and I will Co-GM a Chaos Throne War as Leoness' children
fight for her throne."

Shizumaru says, "Cool."

Shizumaru says, "But again, I say, this was bloody depressing to think
about. o.O"

Anthy says, "We had goatloads of fun."

Gabrielle asks, "will they have the optin of digging the serpents eye out
with the SPoon and making a new PAttern?"

Anthy says, "And it's the only Throne War I've ever seen where Amber was
destroyed, Fuyutsuki/Dworkin died, and the Serpent got his eye back."

Shizumaru says, "Probably."

Seamus says, "The Serpent would take a dim view of that."

Anthy says, "All of the Supporting cast is going to be all the characters
from all the games we've run at KUGAR"

Shizumaru says, "So? Better to reign in Order than the serve in Chaos, if
someone else is all but certain to get the throne. :)"

Shizumaru says, "than to serve"

Gabrielle says, "It would be easy. First, you get the Serpent drunk.
Really drunk. Then out comes the Spoon."

Anthy says, "So the NPC siblings will be the D&D 3E characters, various
other chars and notable NPCs will be members of the court...Like Euthy the
Court Mage, who uses his powers over Fate to rob Vending Machines :)"

Shizumaru says, "He'd probably be wise to that tactic now, Merc. :)"

Shizumaru o.o;;

Gabrielle asks, "Will Malcolm MacFinndo be High Priest of the Serpent?"

Rod says, "well, that was long and messy."

Shizumaru says, "Indeed."

Shizumaru chuckles.

Shizumaru says, "Anyway, John, can you game Corrine and Shizu tonight? :>"

Anthy says, "He'll be a Priest of the Serpent of House Wotan"

Anthy says, "I think so, Drew."

Rod says, "!!NATOW"

Shizumaru says, "Cool."

Shizumaru says, "!OH-OT-OJ-IH"

Shizumaru says, "I messed that up, but oh well."

Anthy says, "BBL.  Have to get food."

Shizumaru waves.

Rod says, "hm"

Rod says, "the cult of Natow"

Rod says, "god of ass-backward destruction"

Gabrielle asks, "Rod, are you still hell-bent on a nihilistic cult of
destruction?"

Rod says, "not really"

Rod says, "i've decided to just take a new approach to everything"

Gabrielle says, "Ah."

Rod says, "like hiding behind everyone else's skirts"

Gabrielle waves out to do stuff.

Tybalt falls asleep.

Autolyca has connected.

Autolyca exclaims, "Howdy!"

Shizumaru says, "Hey."

Windir wakes up.

Shizumaru says, "Hey, Prof."

Dancing Ed says, "Heyo, Droo."

====================
====================

And now, Our very special guest storyteller, Travis (Dancing Ed), with the
precis version and memorable quotes of the KUGAR AMBER THRONE WAR!  Once
again, recorded by Philip Moyer and comments by the usual hangers on.  --
PJM

====================
====================

Shizumaru says, "John told us about the Throne War. What a bloodbath."

Dancing Ed asks, "You hear the carnage report yet?"

Autolyca says, "I haven't heard it"

Dancing Ed says, "Hoooo, yah. o.o"

Autolyca says, "But I'm only gonna be on another ten minutes, so it'd have
to be the short-short-version"

Shizumaru says, "Amber was destroyed. All the Patterns are gone."

Autolyca asks, "Did Mike win?"

Dancing Ed says, "Let's see... 3/4ths of the NPC siblings got killed in
the first 5 minutes."

Shizumaru says, "The Serpent got its eye back, and Barbara rules Chaos.
No."

Dancing Ed says, "Nope. This was Barb's first throne war, too. o.o"

Shizumaru says, "Wow. She pulled an Andrew. ;)"

Dancing Ed says, "Actually, it was a joint win between Barb (who gave back
the JoJ) and Kelly (who summoned the Serpent there in the first place)."

Dancing Ed says, "Actually, I'm a bit surprised that it didn't toast
Kelly, as she had the water demi-jewel and also controlled the Narwhal."

Shizumaru nods.

Seamus says, "It was cool. :)"

Shizumaru says, "It's definitely one for the history books."

Seamus says, "John and I have already plotted out the sequel."

Dancing Ed says, "Sez You. Evil puppet-master of an arch-traitor. ^_-"

Dancing Ed says, "The... sequel? O.O"

Dancing Ed says, "Dear Ghu."

Seamus asks, "Arch-traitor?!?"

Dancing Ed asks, "What else do you call someone who attacks Amber --
*which he's just been named regent of* -- with forces out of Shadow? And
then goes in to loot the castle vault?"

Dancing Ed grins.

Seamus exclaims, "YOU looted the vaults!"

Autolyca says, "Sounds like they beat Brand at the whole traitor business"

Seamus exclaims, "And we never got a chance to attack Amber!"

Seamus exclaims, "You blew up an entire city!"

Dancing Ed says, "Nope, I came in to find the vault open and a lot of
magical items stolen. Since the security of the vault had obviously proven
ineffective, I worked with the Castellan to move the contents to a safer
place."

Dancing Ed says, "As for attacking... what do you call the
energy-guitar-firing Elvii? ^_^"

Seamus says, "... you neglect to mention that you controled his mind and
were leading a bunch of Marxist to kill us in the vault. The Elvii were
reenforcements for the guard."

Seamus exclaims, "Ooo, Dave's send quotes!"

Dancing Ed says, "Nope, I undid the mind-controls you put him under, was
tipped off that you were going to loot the vault, and moved to stop you."

Autolyca asks, "Will John be idle or can he be gotten?"

Seamus says, ""I want to Shine like the Sun!"  - Admiral of the Shalomar
Fleet, RIP. "

Dancing Ed asks, "D'you think Dave and Kelly would mind if John puts up
the diary entries and quotes on his TW pages?"

Seamus says, ""The New fleets?" "We kind of broke the old ones... But all
that water and those fish gave their lives for a good cause." - Kelly and
Mike talking about the nuking of her fleets. "

Seamus says, "Ask em."

Seamus says, ""Nobody EVER expects the Blonde to get hurt..." "Dear,
you're a redhead." "Oh yeah, I keep forgetting that..."  - Barb and Dave
talking about various traps."

Shizumaru sniggers.

Dancing Ed says, "Will do. I'm annoyed that I didn't get to try and use
the Cup of Life to sink the Ren-go-ku in Amber harbor, though. Really --
sailing a ship in to threaten the city with nuclear destruction? o.o ^_^"

Seamus says, ""Has he asked you to tempt him with dancing maidens yet?"
"Why do you think he owed me a favor?" - Mike and Arthur, talking about
Davros the Chaos Stylite."

Dancing Ed mock-pouts. "I wasn't able to come up with any good quotes.
<rueful g>"

Seamus says, ""And if you can't trust Mike Loader and 20 Elvis
Impersonators, who can you trust?" - Mike, assuring people we wouldn't
double-cross them at the Final Showdown. "

Devan the Horrible says, "... We can't trust Mike Loade. o.o"

Seamus says, ""We're gonna kill you deader 'n Disco, man. BECAUSE YOU DID
TOO WELL..." - Mike, to Travis. "

Autolyca exclaims, "Night all!"

Autolyca has disconnected.

Dancing Ed says, "Seeya, Jeff."

Seamus says, ""Kelly, your Option Zero SUCKS!!! Why the hell did you
summon up the Serpent of Chaos!?!?!?!"  - Dave, upon the avatar of Primal
Chaos making an appearance..."

Dancing Ed says, "Except I don't think I did that well at all. I wasn't
able to take care of a single player... they all managed to escape."

Dancing Ed says, "And I didn't even make an attempt on Arthur."

Seamus says, "Travis, you outdid me in sheer evil."

Dancing Ed says, "How so? I wasn't successful in any of my fights."

Seamus says, "Man... the entire rest of the group ganged up on you for the
finale, and if it weren't for the bloody serpent you would have killed
everyone but me and Dave."

Shizumaru says, "...when Mike says someone else outdoes him in sheer
evil...and this someone else is Travis, of all people...."

Seamus says, "I just didn't bank on the universe getting destroyed. -.-"

Dancing Ed says, "Well, assuming Barb didn't survive to the end of her
PatternErasure. If she did, she would have erased me."

Ivan gets the image of Travis' torso scrabbling around after Barb, as a
giant eraser comes out of the sky and wipes him away bit by bit.

Seamus asks, "Anyhow, did you get told my role in the game?"

Dancing Ed says, "Didn't work quite like that. ^_- I was standing at the
center of the combined metal/fire Pattern that I'd turned Marx's flawed
Pattern into. Barb had the JoJ and was walking the Pattern, erasing it
behind her with the JoJ. I threw everything I could think of at her and
stabbed her with my thrown sword, and it was a question of whether she'd
bleed to death before she finished the PatternWalk."

Dancing Ed says, "I'm still impressed that Dave *survived*. Getting blown
down to his head and right hand by a Primal Chaos explosion, then having a
meteor dropped on your stronghold..."

Dancing Ed says, "And I gather he had at least one other attempt made on
him."

Seamus says, "We got out before the meteor hit."

Ivan says, "I know.  John said, Travis.  But that's not stopping the image
of you getting rubbed out like a cartoon."

Dancing Ed says, "Too bad it wasn't the Warner Bros' studio. <wry g>"

Anthy returns

Dancing Ed says, "Heyo, John."

Anthy says, "He survived the meteor by leaving before it hit."

Dancing Ed nods.

Seamus says, "I'm impressed. It beat the KUGAR TW for sheer destruction."

Shizumaru asks, "KeepCon, you mean?"

Seamus says, "Whoops, yah."

Shizumaru says, "I don't think this can be beaten for destruction level.
Unless someone manages to eat the Logrus and destroy ALL universes."

Ivan says, "That's the goal, Droo. :)"

Shizumaru whimpers.

Anthy says, "That's our goal.  We're including several items which, used
properly, can destroy the Logrus :)"

Dancing Ed says, "Aiieeeeeeeee. o.O"

Rod asks, "your goal? for what game?"

Shizumaru says, "Good heavens. X.x"

Shizumaru says, "The sequel to this Throne War."

Alan says, "The first one being a handy can of new, improved, Logrus-Off."

Shizumaru says, "The Chaos Throne War that they're having at the end of
the semester."

Dancing Ed says, "If I miss the auction for this one, Dave's gonna kill
me. o.o"

Devan the Horrible kills Ed anyway.

Anthy says, "We'll make them fire from your job if we have to :)"

Shizumaru pokes Phil. Come back, I wanna game.

Rod exclaims, "IA! IA! ARTWORK! ARTWORK! IA!"